It's Sir Gigous, back to review another chapter.

As always, everything was good. The grammar was good, characters were themselves, and the structure was good as always. There were a few mistakes, though, but nothing too major.

The only real advice I can give at this point is to keep everything organized. Know your scenery, your characters, and above all, your plot.

All in all another wonderful chapter. Update soon!

-[Sir Gigous]-

It's me, Sir Gigous, back for the second time today to review another one of your stories.

I really liked this chapter, actually. Everything fit together rather nicely, and there was just a hint of romance to spice things up. Good job.

Overall, this was also a good chapter grammar wise. Sentence development was good too, along with dialogue and character development. Yep, it was a pretty good chapter.

One thing, though. I thought ax was spelled 'axe'. Maybe it's just a preference thing, which if it is, please just ignore me. But whatever, enough with the rambling.

All in all a great chapter, update soon.

-[Sir Gigous]-

Sir Gigous is here!

Another awesome chapter, as always. Grammar was good, dialogue was good (though slightly unrealistic at times :P), and development was good.

There are a few negatives, however. This chapter felt slightly rushed, probably due to the fact that you wrote it all in one night, and the action just didn't have the 'exciting' feel I was looking for. Don't feel like you have to publish your first draft, we can wait the extra day or so while you edit.

Anyways, it was another great chapter, well done.

-[Sir Gigous]-

Another awesome chapter. Man, it's just been a continuous stream of good chapters in the Rune Factory genre lately. Wow.

Anyways, onto the review. This chapter definitely replaced last chapter as my new favorite. I love dialogue based stories, and the grammar so far has been top-notch all the way through. I salute you.

Onto the negative. The speech was a little unrealistic at times, and I felt some of the personalities a skewed a little, but otherwise everything's ok.

Overall, a great chapter, especially the romance with Tabatha. Keep up the good work.

- Sir Gigous

Yay, another chapter, and not a moment too soon.

Man, I absolutely LOVED that chapter. The dialogue was good (as usual), sentence structure was good, and grammar was good. Overall it was a good chapter.

Also, don't you dare say your writing is bad. Whoever says your writing is bad will get a stern talking to from me.

Onto the romance. There was certainly a diverse mix, including Mist, Tabatha, and Uzuki. Brendan just doesn't know who he wants...

Anyways, hurry up and post the next chapter. I'm dying to see where this is going.

- Sir Gigous

A very solid second chapter. A little bit of character development and a little action and a nice cliffhanger. Very tight and well written, just as I knew it would be. I do like you story, but from your author's note I would like to give a bit of friendly author's advice.

Always remember that is is YOUR story. Don't feel pressured by anyone to change what you want to do or who you want to have in it, portrayed in the manner with which you feel is right. This is why I didn't put a pairing notice in my own stories. I do have intentions for a pairings, but they will be mine and will come as a surprise to whoever reads them. I believe any pairing can be made believable, if the relationship presented in your story is done believably and to your own satisfaction.

It can be a great tool for creating tension by presenting sevenral choices and having your OC make a choice down the road. Perhaps he weights who he likes and agonizes over who he wants to be with and how it might hurt the feelings of someone else. Don't be afraid to play with their emotions or those of your reader. It'll keep them coming back just to find out what happens next. Always remember it is your story to write and if someone else wants to see a specific pairing, they can write their own.

Keep on writing, my friend. It's good and well structured beginning and I'm anxious to see where oyu're going ot go with it.

It's Sir Gigous, back to write another review for this fantastic story.

Onto the review. The chapter was definitely better this time, though it still felt a little rushed. Oh, and the chapter wasn't too short, it was just right in my opinion. I would much rather have multiple short chapters than one big chapter.

The dialogue was better too, along with the sentence structure and character development, but it could still use a bit more work. But who am I to speak when you already surpass me in both speed and skill?

Anyways, onto the romance. Thank you for listening to me on to Anette issue, I'm sure that people will enjoy the fresh change (although don't forget, it's your story, you can do what you want with it). Plus, I'm glad that feeling won't be confessed too soon, because no one likes romance stories consisting of 3 chapters.

Anyways, enough rambling. Update soon, because I'll be waiting.

- Sir Gigous

P.S., what's with the 'Due to a suggestion' part? I wouldn't mind if you used my name, or even my nickname, in your story. I think of it as free advertising :D.

Good introduction if a little hasty. Don't feel so rushed to introduce everyone to Brendan. Take your time and flesh out your OC and over time, once he gets to know everyone, his character will come through.

I'll be keeping an eye on this story. I hoe you've got some good twists and turns planned. You've got a good grasp of writing.

The Rune Factory community has gotten quite a few new writers lately, myself included. It's pretty exciting.

Anyways, onto the review. I loved the beginning, it was fantastic. Great sentence structure, evenly paced, and the dialogue was superb. But as soon as I read past the beginning I ran into some problems.

First off, the story rambled on way too long. I eventually found myself just skimming the dialogue while I waited for something exciting to happen.

Second off, the chapter was way too long. I eventually got bored and had to take a break around the mid-point before continuing.

Third off, the whole chapter seemed rushed. It felt like you tried to cram multiple chapters into one for no reason. We didn't have to have Brendan meet his neighbors, learn his powers, and learn his background all in one chapter.

Lastly, the dialogue structure could use a bit of work. I won't go into detail, but I notice quite a few problems.

Don't take this the wrong way, it's a great story, but I want to help you make it better.

Anyways, onto the romance. I would really prefer if Brendan didn't hook up with Anette, mostly because there's already a dozen Anette stories out there. Tabatha would be a good choice, or maybe Eunice (spelling?), due to the fact that they both seem to like him slightly, but not Anette.

Anyways (I know I use this word too much ;D), overall a great chapter. Can't wait to read more.

- Sir Gigous