This seems like a wonderful idea, but your characterisation of Harry, Ron, Hermione etc. puts me off. A lot. A hell of a fucking lot, actually.

The conversations and interaction between Harry and Hermione seems OCC, overly light-hearted—strange, with how the mood is supposed to be pretty angsty and ‘determined’ or whatever you want to call it. Hermione didn’t seem very regretful, hurt or emotional, and as far as I saw, there wasn’t any indication Hermione was hiding her feelings of angst either. Her POV seemed to lack Ron-mourning in exchange for Harry-studying.

The strain wasn’t there either—you know, with how Harry thinks Hermione is pretty boring without Ron, and how she only pours over books all the time and never jokes around to make everything fun and worth it. It’s either that or it’s emotional—Hermione nagging him over talking about feelings, or over homework, stuff like that. This seemed rather absent in your fic—I, personally, wouldn’t think it that strange if Harry and Hermione actually hooked up. You made Hermione too fun, is what I’m saying. Ron’s absence isn’t all that noticeable when she’s fun and all that—all that Ron is and was supposed to take with him.

Then the situation with Ron and Hermione’s reunion: it looks pretty sexist and OCC.

1) If Ron and Hermione’s roles were exchanged, then things wouldn’t have gone that far. Oh my, a woman curled up on the floor with a man attacking her! CALL THE AURORS! Oh, wait, it was the /woman/ that was att—sorry, yelling at and berating the man, then that’s okay. Just laugh, because a /woman/ wouldn’t be able to inflict any harm upon a /man/!

2) Why would Mrs Weasley just stand by in horror? Where’s the fiercely protective attitude? She’d have chopped Hermione in half for hurting her son in her own home, and then rounded on Ron and chopped him in half, too, because he left his friends in a sticky situation, and then rounded on the twins (presumably), Charlie (again, presumably... was he even there?) and Ginny for laughing and egging her on. She’d not just stand by in horror!

I’m severely disappointed, Mutt.

You really need to work on your characterisation. I advice you to reread Deathly Hallows and analyse their behaviour and make all... /this/ seem more in character, if you ever want to rework it or something.

I’m not done, however. Because of this: Harry walks in, and thinks Hermione attacking Ron is HILARIOUS and DELIGHTFUL? (It’s like the bird scene in the HBP: Rowling subtly—maybe even unconsciously—screws the text to seem like Ron’s fault for being attacked; it’s just that, only this was very much /less/ subtle), In Deathly Hallows, Chapter 19 (I actually opened my book for this), he acts completely differently: the moment Hermione mentions a wand—three second into her and Ron’s argument or so—he puts up a shield, and otherwise he’s sympathetic towards Ron, which is kind of their thing, remember? Since he mourns the loss of Ron here, too, why wouldn’t this situation be the same? Instead, all he thinks about his how much he wants to shag the girl who’s laughing while watching her brother get attacked by a currently rather dangerous person because the person is LIVID and UNRESTRAINED. Put loads of emphasis on that and it’s probably not enough, even then.

But Ginny and Harry are so lovely, aren’t they? I really root for those two... mhm... nah.

Anyway. Sorry for the rant—I just wanted to get it out there, since no one else seemed to mind. Guess I’ll just have to be /that/ person. Otherwise, your writing is wonderful and I can’t complain; it was just the characterisation that was very off and it made me angry. A few awkward sentences here and there is all I can think of besides that.

I haven’t seen the dates on this yet, so you may never see this review, but that may be for the best.

Have a great day.

Good

I love your books do you have your own website?

This chapter was so incredibly sad and so incredibly moving. I never thought I would read a story with a nice Walburga, but I really like the way you portray her and am curious to find out why she changed so much.

Okay

Interesting

I loved the story right up until the "accident" at chapter 16 that caused them to reveal everything. I have seen many time travel fan fictions and so many of them have the characters reveal the truth which is so cliche and so annoying, I'm sorry if I sound rude but why do so many writers constantly "reveal" the truth when they do time travel fics?

Oh wow. Love how you jumped from old past to new present! but the ending, why would Ginny do that? rather jarring but just gets us ready for the sequel. Damn, it's been so fun reading this! I'm happy I discovered it.

Sherry

ooo yeah, a smack down, well deserved smack down for Dumbledore! And now everyone knows. it's so wonderful.

yay. remus knows who the traitor is. so happy.

Oh good grief. what's wrong with her? They should want to know everything so they can change it. and she was so mean to Harry and Ginny. and they need to tell someone about the secret keeper. maybe they can kill peter when they kill riddle. I'm glad the truth is out, but I'm appalled at the reception. You'd think they be overwhelmed with emotion and awe that someone could care enough to risk all that Harry and Ginny have risked.

whew. the last couple chapters were so exciting, with the ritual and all. I love how you dealt with Harry's horcrux. now he's free of it. oh can he finally admit who he is now? Why hasn't anyone recognized him anyway? Doesn't he look like James?

I nnever have gotten the whole thing about toilet seats. why should we women care? Don't sighted women look at the toilet before they sit? Anyway, yay, more Harry time with Sirius. I love it so much. and yay for Ginny yelling at Dumbledore. I didn't care much for him by the end of the series, so I'm having a blast watching someone give him hell.

oh dear. and in this chapter, I think Ginny is being hugely insensitive. Harry's attitude in the cave, considering what he'd been through there not so long ago, is completely understandable. Now one horcrux is gone. and we got to see Sirius. My favorite HP character other than Harry himself.

oh, Dumbledore was kind of a jerk in this chapter, wasn't he? and why Regulus? sorry, I so desperately want Harry to prevent his parents and Sirius death and want him to know them. I'm all for doing whatever they can to change the bad things and to hell with the consequences. I would not make a very good hero. Just in my little humdrum muggle life, if I could change history and my dad didn't die of cancer in 1997, I'd sacrifice anything of my own for that. so, I'm kinda on ginny's side in this chapter.