really good.. just wish you included more dialogue between them.. but still really good. pearlshipping forever..

For motivation, read lots of fanfics. I searched up "Ash and Dawn" on this site for Pearlshipping fanfics and have had the inspiration for many long adventures.

You should make more pearlshipping fanfics if you do I will too

This was amazing.

I love the way you wrote out the scene leading up to the kiss. It was just something special, and makes you feel good, just reading it. :D

This story was the best hoping you let us see chapter 2

I want you to write more. The Second chapter was good but this time you had more errors the your imagination is something that has to be expressed and cherished something that need to be set free even if I am in a way putting you down by sigting your errors I am alsotring to help you because of your promise in this. I myself never want to write I never want to waste my time making things like these because personally I dont think I can change anything with what I can write but instead I can encourage other people like you to embrace your talents. Thats all I got to say thats all you need to know thats all you need as an inspiration

Your first chapter was interesting, it all turning out to be a dream should create a few problems for your story like since Ash did'nt really confess. Well I still did'nt read the second chapter but when I do I hope to see that you made it all work. Anyway fix your grammar alittle you have alot of tense shifts.

Awesome chapter :D

This isn't really constructive critisim lol, but it could have been better if Ash asked her what was wrong first . lol

But it was still cute and fluffy :D

-AshXDawn4Ever-

a thunderstorm to bring them together huh cool i wait to see how this ends up

That was beatiful.*sniff*(maybe its because I'm tired?)

This chapter was nice warm and fluffy . Now time for the constructive critisism well it's not critisism more like an idea to like complete it a little. You could do a part like only for a few seconds of Ashs POV in the part where she said that he looked at her astonished well in his part you could have put something like he thought that her eyes where beutiful in the dim light or something like that...well that's just me . Don't worry it was just an idea your story was cute...did I already say that...lol thus is the longest review I have ever wrote. I'll stop now bye !

Wow I can't belive that was a dream! This chaper had me on the edge every second. Great first chapter by tha way! Can't wait for chapter 2!

Hmm was a dream? who knows? but ya got my attention, i'll be following this story for sure

This is a really good chapter for your first one :)

There was no mistakes, and the plot looks good. I can't wait for the next chapter :)

-AshXDawn4Ever-