Wow... that was intense... o.O
*gulps*
Very good work!

Good story. That was really interesting!

Interesting idea and execution! :D I think you've captured Jonah Prowse quite well. :)

Awesome, loved how you reflected Jonah in this, you had him down pat. I could see him rolling the cigarettes between his fingers, eyeing Collie's matches until she lit one, each time he spoke.

What happened to Emily was so sad, but it certainly did give Jonah reason to kill Tomarchio. It kinda makes ME want to kill him, and she's not even my daughter!

Nice mentions of the major plot for the TV series, especially with tying them into the piece.

Maybe you could do more, with Collie finally tracking down Hawkins or Jake? Or even something to do with Stanley/Mimi?

Hoping to see more. :) Great work!

Wow. This was not what I was expecting. I have to confess that I was expecting a Jake/Heather story. Even though this wasn't what I thought it would be, I've got to say what a fascinating story. You never disappoint.

This is, hands down, the best interpretation I've seen of Jonah Prowse in fanfiction. You don't dumb him down or turn him into some romantic hero. He's there, glaring faults and all. He owns his faults, doesn't apologize for them, isn't misunderstood. He is what he is.

The premise you used for this story also was suprising. I always thought of Tomarchio as a figurehead, but I like this take on him. I was shocked by what happened to poor Emily. No one deserves that. I think I understand why you had it happen in the story, but that was brutal.

Now I'm left wondering so many things. Who was Jonah's informant? Why would that person help him? Will Collie (love that name) ever find out who it was? Will Jonah help? Will Jonah get his cigarettes? And will there be a sequel?