This is quite interesting.

Love this story can't wait for another chapter and it looks ok to me

oh man I need to know how this ends. Update please?

UPDATE!

UPDATE!

UPDATE!

UPDATE!

UPDATE!

UPDATE!

UPDATE!

UPDATE!

The pacing seemed good to me. The only problem is your chapters are super duper short!

THIS CHAPTER IS TOO SHORT

(only read 2nd chapter)

You spelled "curb" wrong.

It made me laugh :)

It's looking good so far

I'm enjoying your story but for me, it's a bit short each chapter. I'm not sayinbg that it's bad but it would be nice

Thanks

TwilightHaseo

hmm, interesting development. and yes, the pace was a bit slow but that's alright. the story and plot is very good so it makes up for it. update again soon please!

I think the pace of the story flows rather nicely. It reveals a new piece of the puzzle each time that leaves me guessing and coming back for more. I loved Gary's explanation of Ash's clothes; it was a great save on his part.

I wonder what will come of the phonecall, how Ash got all of those pokemon, and if meeting them will help him remember. Sounds like the story is getting exciting. Your best chapter yet.

loving this so much so far! Keep going, prez! I really wanna know how this works out!

I simply love your writing style. I do. Your descriptions are amazing and there are lines that are just the perfect fit. "...It's everything you ever were." Awesome.

This is excellent so far.

The way all the pieces fit, but only roughly makes it fun to read. I can't wait to see how it progresses.

I have one question though.

Will we ever find out what happened exactly that made Ash want to walk in front of a car?

Man I really like all the chapters and they always end in a way that seems perfect but it always leaves me wanting more and to see what happens next. I like how were getting clues and hints about how it used to be and what went wrong and the dynamics of the relationships.

Good job! I'm excited for the next one!

this story is so sad! but, i like it...