This was by far THE BEST ff I ever read! I really loved it! Congratulations!

I hope you complete this beautiful piece of work. Can't wait to read the sequel. I have already read the story numerous times.

Hi!

I know it’s been a long while since the last time you updated something, but I really hope you see my review.

The first thing I have to say is simply this: Congratulations! You created one of the BEST third generation fanfics I have read in my whole life, and believe, that’s saying a lot given how many of those I’ve read before. Not only your storytelling is wit and awesome in many ways, but I think your language and tone are also something to flatter, especially because I know how difficult it can be at times to capture a unique voice while respecting grammar and stuff when you’re not writing in your mother tongue (I’m Venezuelan, so English is not my native language neither). In fact, your writing is much better than that of many native English-speakers I’ve seen round there.

I think it’s fair enough to say this is the second time since I read Harry Potter Fanfiction that I run into a Scorose fic that I actually believe, if you know what I mean. The thing is, even though Scorpius/Rose is by far one of my favorite pairings ever because of all the potential I think they have when it comes to having a good love story, I honestly dislike a lot how they and their circumstances are portrayed in most fics. There are so many subtleties that most authors never capture in their stories and, in fact, both the way they depict Scorpius and Rose’s personalities and that of their parents show a lot of misunderstanding of Rowling’s characters. Just to bring a very quick example to the table, many people are seriously convinced Draco was a bit of a playboy Slytherin king and they show it with an incredibly popular, charismatic, and handsome Scorpius.

But whatever, let’s get into your story now, because there are many things to say and I’m sure this review will be quite long. First, I liked pretty much how you mingled the love story with a mystery and a possible future adventure. I think using these kind of tropes in third gen fics without being corny or unbelievable is not at all an easy task; you see, I’ve always thought that putting Rose & Co. into a brand new adventure is kind of odd, like those sequels that use a “stronger” yet weak in terms of storytelling villain just for the sake of… well, having a sequel. But the way you did it feels very well-thought, believable, and also pretty interesting. I was seriously up until six in the morning just to keep reading your story… girl, I was DYING to know who the heck was sending the letters to Rose and what was going with the Malfoy and the Death Eaters! I think your villain has a good motivation and I like pretty much how neither Voldemort nor a lost offspring or something like that was brought to the equation. So, in summary, you handled mystery very well and I loved you how used it in a love story without making it feel forced, you present an interesting villain (one that leaves me wanting to know more about him), and you set the base for a future story that, I’m sure, would be just as amazing (sad I saw in your profile you haven’t worked more on that, but who knows? Maybe you’ll come back one day?)

The second thing I’d love to discuss is your characters. I think you did it brilliantly here; all of them feel very tridimensional and deep. Do I need to say that I loved your Scorpius? Well, I did. I think you created one of the best Scorpius I have read out there and he’s pretty close to how I always imagined him in my mind, as a matter fact. I love his shyness and spookiness, his sweet side, how he has a hard time expressing his emotions, how he has all this dark past and still is such a cute guy. I definitely made the emotional trip alongside Rose (especially when I was looking for explanations too to his behavior during those holidays). And talking about Rose, I think you did an excellent work with her too. I especially loved her dynamics with Albus and her family. Oh, and that conversation with Ron at the end just went smooth: You captured very well their father-daughter bond, you gave them these realistic dynamics and personalities, and Ron never felt OOC. Even more minor characters like Anya, Lily or Annemarie felt well-built.

This leads me to Scorpius and Rose’s relationship. I loved how you created this bond between them first. You see, I firmly believe all good romantic relationships are based on well-developed friendships first, and I’m so happy you gave that to Scorpius and Rose. You gave them the time to get to know to each other, to talk, even to be a little silly around each other and have fun. And I think that’s the key reason why they feel so realistic in this story. Their relationship feels very intense, yeah, but also true and caring. The guys don’t want to simply go and snogg their heads out; they share a real, emotional, and beautifully portrayed bond. From the conversations they have (which always feel very fluent and natural), their more “sensual” moments, the way you describe Rose’s thoughts and feelings… it was all beautifully done.

Another thing I’d like to point out is foreshadowing. I think your foreshadowing was brilliant here. You know, I had a couple of suspicions here and there (not going to mention them here in case a new reader sees my review and gets spoilers), and it somehow shows how well done you handled little hints and clues. Discovering the true at the end felt incredibly satisfactory, as if all of that matched perfectly. It’s obvious to me that you gave much thought to this story and that you planned it out pretty well.

On the other hand, I think you are very good describing emotions. You capture very well all the intensity yet sweetness of Rose and Scorpius’ love, the pleasing and still rather childish feelings Patrick gave to Rose, the terror produced by the letters and how that frightening feeling naturally evolved, Rose’s feelings towards her family’s overprotection, finding out more about the Malfoys and her own family past, all the doubts with Scorpius, etc. You had an excellent balance between “show, don’t tell” and character insight. And what I loved the most, you knew how to be subtle at many times, which only gave more power to your story. Oh, and as a side note, the scenes where the owls came in were frightening as hell. Well done, there, I loved those scenes.
I liked your humor too. Your story never felt too serious or too humorless. It just had the right amount of both things. By the way, I don’t know why, but I just laughed so much with the “Oh, I forgot you were Mr. McPotions” thing and when Lorraine said “Maybe he killed his pet as a potions experiment or something”.

However, there is a little bit constructive criticism I’d like to add too. Minor things, to be honest, but still. The very first thing is that I have to admit I felt a bit disappointed when I saw Scorpius invited Rose to Slytherin’s common room. I’ve always disliked how people forget that entering another house’s common room can even lead to expulsion from Hogwarts. I would have preferred another method for them to have that moment of bonding out there (because besides the fact that they were in Slytherin’s common room, it was a very well written scene). The second thing is that I feel Patrick was quite too much of a simple plot device. I think I would have liked to see him as a more tridimensional character; like that cheating thing could have been built up differently, in a deeper way that made me care more for the character or the Patrick/Rose subplot in general. I don’t know, I just feel that when Rose ran into him and this girl he was kissing, it felt a little odd and too convenient for the plot, so I couldn’t believe it at a hundred percent. And third, I think you somehow made some foreshadowing when Scorpius and Rose were discussing Romeo and Juliet and I think not having them discussing the book and relating it to their own life was a little bit disappointing.

So, I again hope you read this review and I apologize if it’s quite too long. It’s just that I’m so excited with your story, as I haven’t been in a long while, and I felt the need to leave an exhaustive review. Thanks for writing this, because I know it takes its time to write these things. Thanks for giving me these emotions, for leaving me ‘til the morning wondering who the hell was the writer, for characterizing Scorpius and Rose in such a beautiful way. Thank you.

I hope everything goes fine in your life and, who knows? Maybe one day I’ll be able to read your sequel. If you have the time/guts to write professionally, I think you could seriously consider that possibility (in case you’re not doing so already). I believe you have a thing for storytelling and, with hard work here and there, I think you could write brilliant original stories.

So, finally, that’s it. Hope the best for ya and thanks again for writing this fic.

Kisses!

Ok, I loved it but... I was kind of expecting a conversation about Romeo and Juliet and the similarities of their positions. I mean, the Wesley/Malfoy rivaly started even before Ron and Draco, and probably even before Lucius and Arthur. It’s a striking exemple of « two housse, both alike in dignity » (even though not quite, but some are Slytherin from birth and the others are equally loyal to Gryffindor, so they both have feuding families of opposite loyalties, and that kind of makes them alike in « dignity ») That is why I was looking forward to seeing an interesting conversation between the two about the similarities of their situations and perhaps have them wonder about whether or not Muggle Shakespeare was actually a seer.
Other than that, I found it really enjoyable and want to thank you for taking the time to write it.

This is so well written! I like this soft, but weird, but very caring Scorpius, for he is so different from the way other authors depict him. Same as Rose, she is not a bookworm here, and the dynamics between these two are built up well, slowly but surely. I also like the interaction between Ron and Rose. I am always fond of Ron hehehehe! Good job!

Amazing! One if my fav rose fanfics

Isn't it just 'exceeds expectations' not 'exceeds the expectations' (sorry, I'm being reaaaally nit picky, but just...yeah)

Really interesting story . I wish u would have written more ... And if you have time can u write a sequel plz

Yeah, happy new year! In 2017 haha what a coincidence

Read all chapters in one go! Great story :D

I FEEL SO PROUD TO SHARE THE SAME NAME AS Hermione's mother (even if it is just for the story.) but Hey! idc. :)

Patrick is gonna be jelouuuuuus!

Wow! I love the first chap!

Great story, great characters, I will read this again.

I kinda like this. I've read better. I like it that scorpius isn't thick and rose isn't a swot. You show the characters for who they are not who they are expected to be.
Xxx