Lani, what you did to Alice in Chapter 43 was so sick, gross, and nasty that I am inclined to quit reading right here. What you wrote was NC-17 violence p*o*r*n of the sort that shows up in "Saw" movies. When Professor Spooky had Hatter drill a hole in Alice's head, I posted what I'm sure was only the second public flame I've ever posted. Now you're getting the third. I've been on ff dot net since 2007. This was sick. This was gross. This was unnecessary. With this chapter in the story, I would not recommend reading "Behind Sanity" to anyone. I'm astounded that the story is famous with this in it. I can only hope that you had the good sense in the rewrite to remove this horrible scene. Adios, Lani. I'm gone.

I've finished Chapter 41 and the shared hallucination plot is still holding together. I'm quite surprised. The only real missteps so far have been the Cheshire Cat scratching Tommy in Chapter 11 with everyone awake, the idea that a Wonderland resident could be dead in the real world and still alive in Wonderland, and Lani's failure to give the Wonderland residents quirks or characteristics that would make them identifiable in the real world. It's absolutely essential that Alice can identify the Red Queen in the real world to make the plot work.

There has been an over-reliance on coincidence in the plot. The scene in which the Hatter shows up in the school struck me as utterly contrived and out-of-place. The escape from the ambush in the school auditorium, however, was so clever that I'm amazed that American McGee didn't "borrow" it for Alice Madness Returns. Lani obviously has some knowledge of how theater sets work.

In Chapter 41, Lani reveals explicitly why the Wonderland residents believe Alice is "The Champion" in spite of her bumbling. She is the only resident of Wonderland outside of the Red Queen's control. If other residents of Wonderland die in Wonderland, their characters are replaced with new souls. This is not true of Alice. Alice always returns completely healed.

The first Jabberwock fight was a big disappointment. Alice didn't fight at all. Rescued by Gryphon as in the game. In this story, however, Alice doesn't even throw the jacks once. At this point, I wonder why any of the Wonderland creatures believes that she can defeat the Red Queen. They have to keep rescuing her just to keep her alive. The only big battles Alice has fought so far are the Duchess and the Centipede.

On the other hand, the scene with Humpty-Dumpty was a big improvement over the game. Humpty speaks! Alice gets the first piece of the all-important Jabberwock Eyestaff in this area.

Gryphon is completely in character. The same proud and fearless beast as in the game.

I found a continuity error. Alice left the croquet mallet behind in the funhouse and never went back to retrieve it. Yet the croquet mallet shows up in a later inventory of Alice's weapons.

I'm downright disturbed at the casual way that Alice leaves weapons behind. She left the ice wand behind in Hatter's domain and the oversized hammer in Wonderland Woods. She comes across as a real dimwit to me. Probably to Cheshire, too. Later she leaves behind the jackbomb, too, but I suspect it was a one-use weapon in this story.

One of the Wonderland residents is dead in the real world, but alive in Wonderland? This pushes the shared hallucination concept past its breaking point. Not buying it.

Now in the funhouse. The funhouse part is fascinating. Alice has two new weapons: the cards and the jacks. I like how Alice obtains weapons more logically than in the game. Alice gets the jacks from two insane children instead of just stumbling into the jacks behind a broken mirror. The nightmare spider attack was well-done although, as usual, Alice was caught off-guard. Interesting revelation about her body when her consciousness goes back to the real world. Also interesting was how her wounds heal in Wonderland. The rape scene was horrific. FF dot net would definitely now consider this fic to be MA material. Good that anything they'd object to was removed. Nobody in their right mind could object to the first six chapters which are still up.

The chapters between Alice's meeting with Caterpillar and arrival in the funhouse were not so good. There were several rough transitions in which Alice blacks out and reawakens somewhere else in Wonderland. Alice doesn't know how she got there and neither does the reader. The worst was the transition from the Red Chess Realm to the funhouse. That was the worst transition in the game as well. I still think there's a missing second Red Chess level that takes place in the area where the White Queen lost her head. The chapters between the Caterpillar meeting and the funhouse look as though they were written in a rush to get to the funhouse section.

The chapter with the meeting with Caterpillar was fascinating and well-written. I appreciated finding out what the rumbles in Wonderland were. I suppose finding Caterpillar marks the half-way point in the story.

The chapter with the Centipede fight struck me as rushed. Alice still has only two weapons - the knife and croquet mallet - and she still seems a weak character who relies too much on dumb luck and being rescued by Cheshire. The Centipede fight came too early. Where are the cards and the all-important ice wand?

The "shared hallucination" plot is still holding up.

Sometimes it pays to go scavenging through old backup disks. I found two disks with a complete copy of the original "Behind Sanity." I had painstakingly downloaded each and every chapter as an html file. The files all have a date of 12/25/2006. Yes, Christmas Day in 2006. Back then I had no e-reader, and it was hard to read such content on a computer.

Now I have an ancient Aluratek Libre with no wireless card on it. A retro throwback that you have to connect to your computer with a USB cable. I created a folder on my e-reader and loaded all of the html files without their attachment folders into it. The html files work much like TXT files. It is so much easier to read on an e-reader. I'm up to chapter 20 already, and it has been a fascinating read. Highly atmospheric and reminds me of Kount Xero's writing.

The first creak I saw in the shared hallucination plot was in Chapter 11 when Cheshire slashes Tommy on the face. Everybody is awake and Tommy has no connection to Wonderland. Logically, this scene is impossible unless Wonderland is "real." I let it pass as Alice hallucinating and scratching Tommy in the face herself. Nevertheless, this is the first creak in the plot. I haven't seen any more creaks in the plot, but I'm sure there are more coming in the original version. I'm glad Lani realized that this story was worth the effort of a rewrite to correct the old plot flaws. I wish the rewrite were available somewhere that would let you download a file to load on an e-reader. On Wattpad, I can only read on a computer as I do not own a tablet or an internet-connected e-reader with a web browser. I'd pay for a printed copy of the rewrite of "Behind Sanity."

If anyone is wondering why Lani keeps this story up with just a few chapters shown, it's because when she moved it to WattPad, she needed to keep the original up to prove that she was the original author of the story. This is the oldest copy posted. "Behind Sanity" has been plagiarized several times, and WattPad has greater protections against the theft of a story. I don't blame her for moving the story. Why anyone would steal a story that is being given away for free, however, has always been a mystery to me.

I first fully read this story when I was 13, back in 2007. Now, I'm 18, and just finished the story again. This is one of my favourite fan-fictions and one that had such a profound impact on my writing. Thank you so much for teaching me about perseverance, patience, the art of storytelling and the will to see your projects through to the very end. You've been very inspirational to me. Thank you, Lani Lenore. Best of luck with whatever you do in the future.

nice

Well done my friend. The story really do surpassed being as a fanfiction. Just well done!

I'm quite pleased for the completion, the brilliant content and the length. The words flow really well like a novel that I may not be able to let go after I finished it. If there is one.

I don't like it at all. In fact, I'm in love with it. No not even love, words cannot express how I feel about this.

Right on! I expect more well-plotted, excellent, breath-taking stories like this one, from you. Go on and write as you please. I may have learned a thing or two from you.

I'm so pleased you've finally completed this story! I read it ages ago (and honestly thought it was the best fanfic I'd ever read) but you stopped updating and now I can't for the life of me remember where I finished off.

Oh well, I guess I'll just start at the beginning!

holy shit christmas came early

Wow, thanks for writing this awesome story! I truly hope that this will not be the last of your writings I see.

Found myself barely skimming this chaper and the previous. Didn't hold my interest at all.

Just thought you might like to know - this story has always been about Wonderland for me. 2 chapters outside of that? Boring to be honest. I find myself not caring a whit about Robertson or the nurse. They aren't very intersting.

Other than that...the story has been great. :D