Shit

The story is getting intense. I don't know much about Ray Earth Knights as I only saw the movie when I was a kid... but this is turning out to be pretty awesome.

Kakashi... "YOU DID WHAT?!" So priceless!

I love this story so far. The capitalization is driving me a bit nuts, but otherwise, keep up the great work.

fucking. I just read the first chapter and I already know it's gonna be bad. Your grammar is way too bad to keep continuing. Revise it, please.

Damn Ero-sannin, you say your a super perve, you just gotten played by the legendary sucker.

Did you know what the first thing I did was? I downloaded your story, opened it with my word editor and then I proceeded to do a search for all the character names and replace them with a starting CAPTIAL letter. If it happens only a few times I wouldn't mind, or care but some names don't have a capital letter HUNDREDS of times. Seriously. At least you don't write bushin that's something at least. Or thru. Because then I would really dislike it. Not only that but you write/wrote your suffixes with capital letter. Big mistake. Also... Do you even USE a spelling checker? There are so many words I spotted while I was editing it that a spelling checker SHOULD and WOULD have seen.

There's something called an auto replace feature, and what it does -as the name implies- it auto replace words with something else. That's why I insert names like naruto and have it automatically replace it with Naruto. That way I have much less of a chance for a naruto to sneak by me. I do the same with i with I

You have an amazing imagination, and this story idea is absolutely superb. But you are missing a very fundamental rule of grammar, ALWAYS capitalize proper nouns. Personally, I would be too happy if someone wrote my name with a lower case letter. Please fix this.

Too much info.

SLIGHTLY OP NARUTO FOR THE FREAKING WIN

Hinata never stuttered THAT much, even when talking to Naruto. Otherwise, pretty good! ;)

Well, interesting start, makes you wonder what happens in the actual story. I'm interested! ;)

You must CAPITALIZE!

first time i started reading this the grammar was so bad my eyes were spinning then it got better its still there but only every now and then. now the story if genius no joke i don't know if you got it from manga crossover cause its to detailed not to be but the mix is very good if i hadn't read the original naruto manga i would have said this was how the story was meant to be, also i like hinatas character shes she made me laugh

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