Good story!

I love how you work with foreshadowing. It's truly brilliant!

Oh! I just realized what's going on. That took me a while . . . anywhoo, that's brilliant!

Poor Jobal. I am sad...

I read this...

Padmé Nabberrie. Nice ring to it...

hghihfdqcgfudge? Da fuq

Find the 6.
222222222262222222
Find the frowning face.
:):):(:):):):)

I hate episode 6 [Epi.3] but I love how people always puts the hospital first so people understand whats going on. :]

Hi,

I knew Sabé (or what ever her name is sry) was padmé since you mentioned the pendent that Anikan(sp) gave her but I suspected it from near the begining

This is a great story.

Continue the great job!

Bye. :)

This looks like a great story! I look forward to reading it!

:)

Kamai6

Okay! Interesting. I thought that you should have spent more time on other character's reactions. Leia would have been much more welcoming to Anakin; Luke probably would have convinced her to do so.

You need to show and not tell. If you're going to make Jar-Jar be even more clumsy with age, don't tell us. Just show us in a lot of ways. Like in Chapter 3, you told through another that he was clumsy whereas you could have simply had him clumsily get onto the kaadu.

I did like how you put Sabé into this. It's really nice to get away from just the Original Trilogy for you!

-Winterluna

I thought your Gungan was really good, but it was a bit exaggerated at times. Just make sure that you don't overdo it so the reader can understand it.

Otherwise, I'm looking forward to seeing if you will put Jar-Jar in there...

-Winterluna

that was amazing. hurry up and get the sequel up.