Great story! There were a few things. There would have been more if I didn't read the fact that you wrote this before BD...

The first thing was that you called it a Preface in stead of a prologue. A preface explains why you wrote a book, and a prologue tells what happens before the book itself starts.

Renée and andy's last name is Dwire, not Sparks.

The story about what happens to La Push in chapter 5.2 is interesting.

Something I noticed in general is that you kept writing "to" in stead of "too".

... I think that's about it.

Keep up the great work! :) (:

Tarah xXx

Why did you kill the pack? i luv all of them :( this better be a joke

Hi Sarah. I'm one of your listeners. I've e-mailed you a few times. I'm only just finished chapter 15, but I just wanted to let you know that your fanfiction is pretty awesome! I absolutely love it! It's amazing.

However you might want to get a little more descriptive, especially when the POV is from a vampire.

You also might want to be careful about which adjectives and adverbs you use. Some don't seem to fit vampires. Like Carlisle's "itchy wig". It just doesn't seem like stuff like that would be realistic for these vampires... or as realistic as vampires can get :) lol.

I really love it though. I wish I could read every day! Busy life with finals lately and end of the year school stuff. You know how it goes. Love your fanfiction and love the podcasts! Keep it up!

-Gen

Great ending!

great!

but im confused, doesnt it say in breaking dawn that charlie knows kind of what happened? with all the "need to know" stuff? and what about renesmee? the pack all died? sad... cant wait to read more!

omg that was a good chapter and I can't wait for the ending because I'm just about dying with suspense now

you're right, it was weird the way the volturi were taken down, but you're also right about the irony.

Still, it is impractical and SM would never write something like that, but I will not complain nor argue. After all, it is just merely fan fiction.

Can't wait for the next one

yay! ilove my power! i might use it in my fanfiction. i wasn't sure what Bella's powers should be, but that could eb an awesome idea! lol, but i can't wait to find out what happens to andy and nicole! update soon plz!

I like this story, I do. I like your characters, and you've a good sense of suspense. But, can I just, well...it's just that you seem to get "your" and "you're" mixed up a lot. "Your" is for the possessive: it's your turn, are you wearing your shoes, etc. You should use "you're" when what you really mean is "You are". It's an easy test - just see if "you are" would fit in the sentence, and then you know to use "you're" instead of "your".

Best of luck! Looking forward to see how this turns out!

I was never very good with riddles. Well I think that Nicole is having a hard time choosing sides. She likes Andy but then the Volturi will kill her if she betrays them. The Bella thing is hard. Mabe somehow Jane got into her brain and was torturing her. Well I'm not sure about the seperation thing and wats gonna happen to Andy. Um mabe Kahona will fall in battle. I don't want Nicole to. I think she is cool. I'm not sure if u wanted me to put up wat i thought would happen but i did anyway XD. You did great on this chapter! PLZ UPDATE SOON!

How can you do this to me! It,s not fair all of the cliff hangers!

I love the story but you are being a very mean person :)

Yo are an amazing writer and is that who will fall in battle question perhaps a trick question meaning Kahona will fall?

I can't wait until you update!

Sam Cullen, if only that were true! :)

I think Nicoles on the good side

i tired going through these questions, and it made me realize how complexx this plot really is! You're really good at this, and i can;t wait for you to update!

his story is awsome!

AH!

he's gonna meet bella!

you're story about how the pack died is really creative and i love it although it's super sad.

keep up the awesomeness!