HAHA. Fai WOULD be able to concoct an entirely improbable but believable lie like that one. XD And of course the rest of it was funny too. Lovely slice of life fic.

THIS STORY IS SO DUMB IT'S ALMOST FUNNY.

Ah, how sweet! I adore the family aspect of the manga. Very IC and with a nice flow. Your language is quite "picture-esque"; it really gives you the feeling of being there and watching everything that happens rather than just reading about it. Just keep in mind that one should never write like this:

"Character A says. Character B does," but rather:

"Character A says.

Character B does."

Namely, in this sentence, there is a momentarilly confusion on who actually speaks:

“Ah, Kuro-pi’s smiling.” Kurogane scowled. One two-second lapse and trust the mage to be there to witness it.

Other than that, this was a very enjoyable read!

awsome i love it

"from anger of course, not total mortification" Of course, Kuro-rin, whatever you say! x3

Nice one-shot! So canon, too...

That was seriously adorable. Totally IC so no worries about that! I love how simple and comprehensive your style of writing is. It really gives you the feel of being in that mansion with them, watching their moments of 'family time'. . Just too sweet for words! You can expect more reviews from me if you keep up this sugary style of writing. Great job! And I understand your obsession...-nods in agreement-

Love,

RIn