Woah, did Sylux die? Or did she make him pass out?

Woah, did Sylux die? Or did she make him pass out or something?

Hey, I didn't update my story for months, while I was still hooked to EA's Spore. I, for one, am just glad you're updating.

I take it Samus and Dark Samus are going to get in this big power struggle for control of the body. Intense!

I have to ask: is this Dark Samus the same one in Metroid Primes 2 and 3, the re-incarnation of Metroid Prime? Or a new entity entirely? Or are you waiting for the "right time" to tell us?

Once again you do not disappoint. You keep the pace flowing nicely, yet leave so many questions for us to ponder.

I didn't like the (presumably) Federation superiors chatting about retaliating against Samus. It was rather jagged, and the fact that they go 'Ooh, Samus just attacked us, we've got to kill her' instead of 'Samus just attacked us? WTF?' didn't seem reasonable.

I did like Dark Samus' little reveal. I suppose that was the idea: the treat on the stick won't work if we know we won't get the treat.

So Spire's found more of his species, Samus is being targeted by the federation (probably) as well as the Space Pirates, Samus is now corrupt,Sylux seems to have allied with her, they're heading for the Alimbic cluster, probably to get Gorea, The Space Pirates are trying to translate some newspapaer that is hiding some secret. A very Nice Chapter Inoctutaile. Very Nice.

This kind of reminds me of a fic idea I've been toying with myself for the past few months or so. In it at the end of MP3 instead of waiting to see Dark Samus explode into blue as she has two times before, Samus deciding that there's no way in HELL she's gonna let her escape another thing, hooks her with her grapple beam and sucks all of DS' power right out of her and into a storage crystal that then at some point later gets buried in Samus' chest, and ends up causing a lot of mayhem.

Gripping chapter, and quite well written. So much suspence!

AAh I'm VERY SORRY about my review for ch.4

Uuh? I dont want something to happen like last time but the first few sentences I read said "her homeworld Tallon1V". Please dont get mad at me again but that could confuse people who have potentially not played the game. In other words her homeworld isn't Tallon1V

Interesting first chapter, I like the fact that you used the weaknesses to affinty weapons displayed in MP:Hunters. Sylux with two arm cannons? Now that would have been handy in Hunters O_*

Very high quality, and very enjoyable.

I should proofread before hitting that "Submit Review" button down there. I meant "3".

I'm thankful I didn't have to suggest an improvement in proofreading. That would have been a humorous embarrassment.

The ending of chapter one was interesting. Phazon rearing its ugly head within Samus was a nice touch, and it opens up several possibilities in my mind. I'm really curious as to which direction you are going to take that little detail, and I can't wait to read more regarding that.

A self-aware Adam program is also interesting.

As a character, I don't think Samus would have so readily believed Sylux about his connection with her father.

I also find myself agreeing with Guiltyslayer - a neck shot isn't greatly different from a head shot. Your writing made it sound like her shot it hit him square in the adam's apple (assuming that species has those). You could point to differences between the physiology between humans and Space Pirates (a stretch of the imagination, but it could work), but even then...

As for the writing itself, I can find no real issue with it. You crossed all your t's and dotted all your i's, as my English teacher would say (even when I missed a t or two). I now await chapter 2.

I mean when they were in the caves and samus sniped him in the NECK! That should have by all rights been the same as a headshot and done the same job

I am interested.