what the fuck was this!?

if it is a woman then reright to the point were wolfrom never become a man again or stop saying she and skirt and such please and say man and pants

Do you have a sequel for this

For VK (Guest),

First off flames I don't mind but you obviously are too scared to show who you are when you go to review someones stories so this will just pull cowardice to your side. Also, don't call someone stuck up in a review when you have no clue who they are in real life or read any of their other stories. And the third strike you are out would be the fact that you knock my spelling and grammar, please take another look at your review then start badmouthing someones grammar and spelling. I really hate hypocrites since they think they can "bitch" and moan about what an author puts in their story but when they are right up face on they cannot take the criticism their selves and hide behind their petty masks. So if this was baseball you would be struck out.

No offense but I couldn't get through te first chapter. You sound like a conceited person, you jump around so muc when writing te story, and your lack of vocabulary makes me think a 12 year old wrote this.

You know, I would really enjoy this story now that I'm really halfway but I am starting to feel that this is becoming too OOC, to the point wherein the fact that KKM is nearly ignored. I like the protruding characters and the created ones but they're becoming way too dominant in the story. If you could, for future references, tone it down a little bit. It's a great plot, but I don't like stories with characters that nearly dominate the whole story. The whole point of a fanfiction is to create fanfics of your fandom.

u/3926020/ This person here has been giving me a problem and even used her "sister's" account to try and in my opinion "cuss" me out. Sorry girlie but your way of apologizing kinda didn't impress me much but since I'm the older one here I will accept your apology and be the bigger person. I'm right now going through the stress of having my stories being put through the press right now and it is always stressing when they first go through them to be put on shelves. But the thing is you did wrong calling someone a liar in the first place. Because of the fact that people can change their ID names on here and I don't know if you know it in the first place. But to be honest I've gotten tons of messages by all of those that read my stories and they have all said that all of you Three that have been giving negative reviews on there shouldn't be on this site in the first place. Now I'm not going to say you should be removed from this site I'm giving you a good bit of doubt that you learn more when you practice your writing on a site in the first place. Negative reviews are always a bain to everyone's who is a true grit writer in the first place and since I've been writing for more than ten years not counting the ten where I've been an actual published writer I can tell you it takes time to get yourselves published. But negative reviews like what you and BlackMagicThing have been giving to the NEW writers on here can be a good reason why those stories didn't get finished in the first place. You thought they were a good story so start off saying that it was a good story. Then you ask them if you could give them pointers and a little bit of tips and point out what they could change. But the simple review is always what a new author is looking forward to. They are always doubtful about their writing and until they have been at it for years it could make it worse for them in the first place. I look forward to reading all NEW authors works. Do you know why? Because there is a chance any of those writers could be put on the top. And the stories that I write are one of the most toughest because they are sci-fi/fantasy/romance. And one good thing all authors should have a high dose of is imagination. That's one thing I love seeing even in the younger generations. Because the world of the imagination has no bounds nor anything can destroy it or shouldn't. But anyway, I am glad you actually apologized to me even though it sounds like you were trying to explain exactly to everyone why you put it on there with a tint of hostility though you shouldn't even be having that in an apology. I love all of my reviewers and the fact that they love my stories in the first place boosts me even higher when I'm working on my own stories and not my fanfics.

Hey everyone can I get someone to laugh with me on something? I did a little reviewing of the "little girl/boy" and noticed that she favorited her own self on the other account! What can you say about others besides being scared that they are too into themselves. So chase3136 and YukiKagami are one and same person who thinks others are stupid and don't know how to look at them. Sorry little "thing" but you are 1 million years too soon to try to even get to where all of us are.

Okay first off and yes I have the word counts of BOTH of your "reviews" and will call you a hypocrite because you wrote more than I did on mine combined on both of yours and yes I have notified tons of the other readers in this section about your negativity and they came to an agreement with me stating that those that give bad reviews on here shouldn't be criticizing other people's works. MissAdorkable's ID was changed only recently from the look of it you do not realize that and for another she didn't give any negative feedback so I never said anything offensive towards her. The lack of intelligence you are showing others puts me in mind why I stopped reading the only one I did read of yours to boot. If you are going to boast about knowing her then you should have known that but then looking at how old your account is shows me that you do not know about her since when she replied if you want to criticize someone then expect it in turn and don't go all "I know big words but don't know the way they are used" on people. Giving you a tip here you may say you are an author on here but there is something called spell checker that all of us know about but apparently you do not. By the way contradiction much? You say starting out you have never read any of my stories then you say that they are OOC and out of context? Sheesh you must realize that some authors change their status message for their stories to let them know what is going on in the new chapter. So um durrrrrrr. There is also another thing that makes you even more pathetic to my eyes and probably to the others... You change to a different account or name and try to get at me that way. Really? Seriously? God you are so pathetically naive and you don't realize that I don't give a crap one way or another if you didn't like it or don't like me or what I say to my readers. I tell the honest truth to them and if they don't like it they can stop reading. They listen, what about you? Oh wait that is because you are pathetic right? Thanks for showing everyone here that you are and I'm making sure that they see this just to know how pathetic you are in your sportsmanship of being an "author". Enjoy it while you are at it because if they see this they probably will do like a few others and block you and your stories from their eyes. Please let me know when you grow that one important thing that brings the reality to your eyes and that would be a brain or just let me know when you have the operation to remove your rose colored glasses because reality is a whole lot harsher than you realize little "girl" and then you should just learn who would actually give a crap because in all honesty I DO NOT! By the way I know I will probably get a laugh from this from my other "readers" since they have already seen me cuss a few others out and this one didn't realize that this person doesn't care about her idealistic beliefs in how someone should write. Those that just read it for their own pleasure is who we should be thinking about not some stupid petty little girl/boy (can't tell if you are just gay or just a little girl anymore). I love all of my readers stories and believe me there isn't many I have turned away from on the first page but yours is mostly because yours is a fractured story that is showing incomplete research on it. Start researching then you might actually have more who would "review" since you are review starved.

Chase3136's Reply to Aerianna69's rude response to Chase3136.

"Okay, first of all" her actual pen name (MissAdorkable, was it you called her?) was BlackMagicThing, I at least actually read all your "reviews" before I wrote mine.

Yes, my review was long and I had a lot to say but if YOU are going to then tell me that I am "long-winded" then maybe you should shorten YOUR response instead of looking like a hypocrite. In fact YOUR response was SO "long-winded" that I didn't recieve all of it. Oh, well. From what I DID manage to read of your reply I now have no harsh feelings towards myself for posting what I did, because I MEANT EVERY WORD.

Like I said, I don't CARE if you've published something before, people who think highly of themselves usually fall the hardest, and I PM with two writers who have published more works then your "one" and they do not boast about their "talent". They are NICE people. I didn't much care for your story, true, however I stressed in my review that I wouldn't have said ANYTHING if you had not offended me with your, and yes it was arrogence. And I suspect you offended others as well, although no one has said anything, and I believe that is because they could tell just by your comments before and after many of the chapters of your story that you are a naturally vicious person. As you have proven by your threat to me; "Do you want people to start going onto your stories and doing the same to you? Because I can make that happen real quick." Again, you claim to be mature and above sending bad reviews and yet you respond with this and other omments which I will not mention here.

THIS WAS THE FIRST EVER NEGATIVE REVIEW I HAVE WRITTEN, and I don't plan on writting any more because I am NOT a malicious person. HOWEVER, YOUR REPLY WAS EXACTLY WHAT I EXPECTED FROM YOU, AND THAT IS WHY I DO NOT REGRET MY OWN OPINION. Keep on writing Aerianna69, I will never begrudge ANYBODY that, even when people like you use it as a weapon against others.

And IF that is true what you said about Zihuhu; "Okay and the Zihuhu review was given to me by someone I know in real life by the name of Jorge Pedraza who stalked me even though I tried to get him to go away." Then I take back what I said in defense of him. IF! -HOWEVER, I will stand by everything else that I have mentioned, because I told the TRUTH. Take what you want from this, if you don't want to learn from your mistakes (like how your words came across, which is easily fixed. Write it differently, it's only your comments after all, but whatever.) and grow as a writer, then that's up to you. Nothing I can do about that.

Chase3136 was blocked from responding to Aerianna69's PM about her review.

"Although it is my first time to write a fanfic I have been writing my own stories and drawing my own manga for some years now. So yes I do have a lot of talent in writing since everyone loved my stories while I was going to school." This makes you sound like an egotist. I really hope that you are not as conceited as this gives the impression. And I'm not normally very critical about the fics that I read because it's all in good fun and everyone is equalled in enthusiasm as fans, even when some are more hardcore then others, this is a space where we can share ideas and learning with those who share our passion for fiction.

HOWEVER, this statement of over confidence, verging on arrogence, really got my back up. You self-proclaimed YOURSELF "talented" because people you went to school with loved your stories...

So what? Have you published something? "Everyone" whose read MY stories loved them, that doesn't make ME a talented writer! Far from it! And I'm not just saying this to "burn" you, really I'm not. I've NEVER writen a negative review in the full five years that I've been reading fanfic on this website. And I wouldn't have mentioned ANYTHING if you had COME THROUGH ON YOUR BOAST. But your fic is not perfectly writen, or even all that "talented". The ideas are inventive and well researched I'll give you that, but they have nothing compatible to the Kyo Kara Maoh! series. ALL the characters (except of your own creation, of course.) are Out Of Character and the whole Wolfram turning into a girl -thing, although not impossible in the KKM! series (note: Maxine or Cropped-Pony who falls under a spell that changes him into a female), it does nothing to this plot (except allow Wolfram the abilities to give birth to babies, but if you wanted that then you might as well have played off the MPreg hints within the series). Also there is no development of Yuri and Wolfram's relationship, this chapter (only the second chapter in) feels rushed and trigger-happy, too eager to get to the smut to build a foundation for any romantic feelings other then lust.

I am angery with myself for even commenting on my undoubtedly harsh thoughts, however your "reply" to the ONE negative review that you recieved really irked me, ESPECIALLY since you had claimed (again in pretence) in an earlier reply that you would be the "bigger person" (To Zihuhu in chapter 13, who by the way didn't write ANY negative comments in his/her review and even Favoured this story.) and not respond like you eventually did, anyway. MAYBE you would take down your own comment and allow others to see for themselves whether you are a talented writer or not instead of issuing a challenge as such. Admittedly, I've never read any Manga you have written so I hope they at least live up to your own assertion. I'm a HUGE fan of KKM! and I hate that I felt I needed to write a comment like this to anybody, but arrogance is one of the few things that really offends me and I don't care if you HAVE published something, somewhere, you made a huge promise in the FIRST CHAPTER of this story and you DID NOT deliver. THAT is why people should not self-advertise. And yes, my opinion is just as good as everyone who reviewed your story with praise, whether you want to see it that way or not. Criticism is not only a part of life but a substantial part of growing.

And expanding on BlackMagicThing's comment, (whom you dubbed "MissAdorkable33501", yeah really mature THAT is.) having the characters communicating with the writer ONLY works if it's FUNNY. And since your story is NOT a biography your counterpoint is moot. It's very entertaining when it's humorous, but in this it was NOT.

However absolutely do NOT give up on the sequel to this story (no, that's NOT what I want to come across from this!), you DO have the right to express yourself in your writing and to that I have NO objection. Only aim to become better like ALL OF US that visit fanfiction. net, even if that someone DOESN'T write stories and only reviews. We are supposed to support each other and I want to be supportive, so please don't put yourself above others. Let others do that for you, and if you are as talented as you say you are then there is NO NEED for you to advertise yourself, anyway. Like I said; we are ALL equal here. That's all I wanted to say.

Little trouble makers! LOL just love the kids! Hope Conrad & Yozak make up soon...

i am loving your story. One thing that i noticed is that you misued the word bequeath, to bequeath is to pass something onto someone. I think you ment to beseach ask pleadingly or to beg

Wolfram had the elemental first and one of the twins is born! Can't wait to read about the rest of the birth and what the twins and elemental look like! Hurry with the next chapter!

yay! they're finally married! hahaha and gwendal is always shy like that even though he doesn't show it...