I like it. You really captured the Seven Deadly Sins well.

ash was greed and pride and...and...possibly envy...?

my god you are good at this. *is a little overwhelmed*

i loved the gluttony one, especially. maybe cuz that's my vice, along with sloth. doesn't make for a very good combination, but then again, who cares?

well, i probably will. in a few decades, when it all catches up to me...

good job. you've got me all depressed. i'm gonna read the rest of your angst/horror and then go find something stupid and mindless and funny.

How sad and interesting sins that I ever heard before and I do enjoy it!

COOL! The last one is sad. -cries- Ash sucks. It's a fact. Update on See You On the Other Side please!

-Pwnful Chaotic Dork

Sort of spooky. But good. The pride bit is my favourite. But the lust bit was not so much a lustful trainer as an uncaring, partially envious one. Lust is generally, more a M rating thing.

My pokemon are staring at me. One asks, “Don’t you love us?” I shake my head. “No. I want the beautiful pokemon. You can’t possibly compare.” My Kirlia shakes her head. “As you wish.” She pirouettes, and walks away from me, beckoning to the others. But she turns. She has my Shuppet in her hands.

He’s crying.

...I don’t care.

Her eyes alight blue. “But beauty comes with a price.” She turns, and I never see her again.

Something about that just seems beyond beautiful.

Evil Kirlia..Not her pokemon!

This was good, except for some mistakes here and there. The 7 sins are usually more mental in nature, since the physical forms of the 7 sins are more expressions than the actual sin, so...

In Greed, 'They’ll all mine' sounds a little odd. I think you mean 'they're'. Also, Mewtwo's name isn't capitalized anywhere except the M.

Envy isn't jealousy, and pure envy doesn't usually go beyond the mind's longing, so the implication of the trainer killing to be better doesn't exactly fit in with the theme.

With Wrath, it seems more like blame or shirking responsibility. The root of anger isn't always a mistake.

Lust is a little odd, and while it's pretty much acceptable, it seems a little out of point, more like greed and wrath (trainer and Pokémon, respectively) combined than actual lust...

Pride seems more naiveté in nature. Being proud is believing that one is better than others... I think... and the "OMG I AM SO A GIFT TO THE WORLD' effect was slightly overdone, makes the trainer seem delusional, not prideful...

Gluttony was well done, if slightly morbid...

Ah, Sloth. The trainer isn't exactly lazy, since you use 'couldn't' instead of 'wouldn't' which implies that the trainer was restricted in some way other than choice and was thus unable to wave his/her pokemon... but 'never wake up' is a strong note on which to end the fic. Good job there.

Overall, try to cut down on the paragraphing a little, the disjointed-train-of-thought effect gets a little distracting at times. Also, keep tense consistent. Otherwise, good. :)

Keep writing.

omg... the ending was soo sadd... DD:

very well-written. I wonder who each of the Trainers mentioned are? I'm pretty sure Wrath is Paul, though...

Anyway, GREAT JOB. :D

[rayquaza]

This is one of the best oneshots I've read! I wonder who might be in the Envy part. Ash will have a lot to confess...

Feel sad for the Gardevoir, especially due to the fact that I'm a Ralts fan. Though I'm glad she died sacraficing herself for her trainer. Her trainer actually felt sad that she died, unlike the others. Can you tell me which trainer it was?