What happened to Marcus, you forgot Fox and Krystal's son!

So i finally finished reading this... and it's a masterpiece... *SPOILER* and the thing with fay... shit man... that hit hard... *END OF SPOILER*
tho you should put a patreon or something, let us know where we can follow your work because you are one good damn writter

I feel I owe it to you, Vexed, to review this fic for all the effort you clearly put into it, but I'm sorry to say I did not enjoy it. The plot and characters were interesting, but I felt the whole thing was excessively detailed and very slow to develop- I chose to leave my review on chapter 31 because I feel it is only at this point that the story has really moved beyond the beginning- that is to say that despite how much has been written, not much has actually happened. I enjoyed how the characters developed emotionally and mentally, but it took so long to get threw each individual scene in the story. I'm sure I'm in the minority here, but this fic just didn't do it for me.

This story gave me everything I wanted from a Star Fox story and then some, many times over. Now that I've read "Chaos Effect," other stories just don't seem as good. I can't think of anything I'd change or anything I would want to be different. When I finished the last page, I got that slightly bittersweet feeling one gets when coming to the end of a really satisfying book, game, or movie. One of my favorite stories that I've ever read, fan fiction or otherwise. 10/10 FFOTY.

Wow... what a ride. I read the whole thing in a few sittings over the course of about a week, finished yesterday, and I'm still a little shell-shocked. I won't review any plot points because I don't want anyone to accidentally get spoilered and miss out on every bit this story has to offer, but that was incredible. Thanks for writing!

I have never once left a review, had a few typed up that I backspaced on a few other stories of different authors. But holy son of a shit this is by far some of the best writing I have ever seen anywhere. The plot is both linear and dynamic, and it all flows seemlessly into one another without being lost in the big picture. There were a few times I got confused on who a character was but the story seemlessly clarified who they were to me as the story progessed reminding me of who they were without having to backtrack and without shoving it my face. Vekkar being one. Not once was I bored reading this and the tension felt real and unforced especially after I realized you werent affraid to kill people off. The characters struggles felt real as well as their personalities being on point with who they are. And then their are the Progienators. Never have I seen
spoiler alerthumans inserted into this fandom and work. Never, not even close. Even authors inserting human things like clothing brands and things of the sort always made me cringe and lose interest from how it draws you out of the story. But you did it flawlessly and I cant even imagine a better way to have done it. Also loved the military action! You did an excellent job on the lingo. There honestly wasnt a single thing that stuck out as sounding off which is impressive. Being military, dialog trying to emmulate us sticks out like a sore thumb and most people make it sound way too uptight forgetting that fact that were still people. Great example is Bills squadron, how they would sound prefesional over standard comms and then the banter beings. Loved it!

I can easily agree with other readers here. This is the best Star Fox fan fic, not one of the best, the best, and one of the best stories Ive ever read as a whole.

I honestly want command to be cannon just so we can petition for this story to be cannon. The perfect conclusion.

Thank you for your efforts, reading this was one helluva ride and theres a lot more I can say (Foxes redemption being a big one) but this reviews already long. Excellent work. simply amazing work.

P.S. You actually finished the damn story too so that already puts you ahead of 80% of the fandom right there lol.

Ok, two girls, one unlucky dude, this gonna get good. Someone pass the popcorn.

...I have read this entire story 10 times...and each time, I am driven to the edge of my seat with suspense, feelings of horror, cravings for action, and much more...

Out of all the Sci-fi stories I have read in the last 10 years of my life, THIS fan fiction continues to, not only give me nightmares, but leave me wanting more and more. Good sir/madam, you are an artist.

Please continue writing. Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue. You are a master of suspense and, if I may, do so, I speak for your reviewers and fans when we say we want to see more of your artwork in action.

Thank you for this story. It is a treasure.

Best Star Fox fanfic of all time. There is nothing else to be said.

As a whole, I still say this is the best Star Fox story I've ever read. Nothing else even comes close. I think if in the far off future English classes had a unit on Star Fox fanfics, this would be the story the school system would make everyone read for the next 50 years XD However, there's something unfortunate about finishing this fic. Now that I've seen the pinnacle of Star Fox fanfics, everything after this may end up feeling like something of a letdown, you know?

But then again, while you covered a lot of things and gave Fox an amazing amount of character development, the rest of the cast suffered somewhat. Granted it's amazing how many characters you fit into this story, giving everybody at least a chapter or two of focus, but I figured Star Fox wasn't going to come together until the final battle...yet you teased it would happen eariler throughout the story. Rather annoying. Then again, if they tagged along, I do wonder how Falco and the others would have reacted if they had to be around to see Fox brutally murder Vaccini, or what would have happened if they were in Vekker's fleet when Andross came to infect it all.

Also like I said, I notice earlier in the story your writing was quite a bit leaner and the chapters were shorter, and they just swelled up to ginormous size the further we went. I didn't like that. There were some chapters where I think you were indulging a little too much in a scene (like Paul Williams or the Progenitor's history), and I think you could have cut back quite a bit without us missing anything important.

One more thing... I think this story should be an M instead of a T. You use the F-word liberally and there's a lot of gore and violence to go around. It's about on the level of playing a Halo game, especially since the Aparoids seem to function a lot like the Flood for much of the story.

You know, I thought this review of the story as a whole would be longer, but I don't have as much to say as I thought I would. The story had a very satisfying conclusion, but now that I'm done I feel exhausted, and I just want to take a break from reading/writing fanfics for a while. Doesn't help I had all those little emotional problems I told you about while reading this story. In hindsight though, you're right. I'm taking this whole writing thing too seriously and I need to chill the fuck out XD

I guess if there's anything I didn't comment on you want to talk about, we could do it via PM. Like I said, I may have some questions about how you developed your plot and characters anyway, so I may be PMing you back with those.

Chapter 64

Having read the rest of the story now, I know everything pretty well goes to shit past this point and it doesn't let up until the story ends. So I very much appreciate you giving us one last chance to relax here before the action kicks into high gear.

Slippy's little country home sounds amazing. I wish I could go there. However, I notice you mention someone has a pet, and I was kinda curious what kinds of pets furries would keep XD Was too bad you didn't go into detail about that.

Anyway, I liked the little interactions between Katt, Falco, and Slippy, plus Amanda.

However... Now that I've finished the story, I know that Avians siding with Venom and most of the other races siding with Corneria doesn't really go anywhere, so I don't see much of a point having that part in this chapter. The quote from Xiao about the emperor killing all the mercenaries was ominous but again didn't really go anywhere either. Feels kind of like needless tension looking back at this part. I would have either made this more of a plot point earlier in the story or just left it out.

Chapter 65, 66, 67

Now that I know how the story ends, Fox looks really goddamn stupid with what he did in this chapter. Same with Krystal. He almost doomed the entire universe to being consumed by Andross and the Aparoids, just because he wanted to see his father again. Vekkar turned out to be quite right about the need to not bring the Eye so close to their fleet or Lylat.

Then again, if Vekkar got to execute his plan the way he wanted to (from what I remember), I don't think the result would have been much different. Fox and Krystal would have just had a team around them on the Eye that probably would have died anyway. Krystal probably would have gotten hostile anima in her anyway and Andross would have forced Fox to make the same choice, thus giving him a chance at taking away the Lance.

Damn though, Vekkar, his army, and their ships just end up becoming food, biomass, and weapons for the Aparoids and Andross. I didn't see that coming. Didn't think it'd all turn to shit so fast.

Also, I figured what Touvier became on Corneria would end up playing into whatever Aparoid attack happened later.

Chapter 68 and 69

On the one hand, I was looking forward to seeing how the Aparoid infestation on Corneria would play out, and I was not disappointed at all. Pure Dawn of the Dead there. However, it's kind of weird how sometimes there are monsters around Lucy, Peppy, and the agent, but then they're gone and the characters don't seem to have much trouble maneuvering around the city. Feels a bit arbitrary. I was figuring the Aparoids would be more like mindless zombies that would simply flood the entire city and make it too dangerous to go anywhere...instead of being around sometimes but then wandering off at other times.

Paul Williams story was interesting, and he got an amazing amount of character development for only having two chapters. I really did love his story and shedding background on how the CIA's shadowy stuff works in Corneria. I never thought much of how Peppy's wife died but you turned it into an amazing story, with both Peppy and Paul piecing together what happened.

On the other...it felt weird having this side story going on in the middle of what's basically a zombie apocalypse. It feels kind of like you wanted this subplot to be more important earlier in the story, but then you forgot about it and realized you had to rush it in for Peppy's final scene in Corneria. Also, I think it dragged on a bit too long. I was starting to think "Would you just die already?" towards the end of Chapter 69.

Chapter 70

Goddamn this was a long chapter, but what an amazing amount of character development between Fox and his father James. James helping Fox sort through all his bad memories and nightmares was amazing to watch, before James has to sacrifice himself to give Fox what he needs to save Lylat. Eh...it may have gone on a bit too long like the last chapter though. I think it was the right decision to keep this all as one big chunk myself. How long did it take you to write this chapter anyway? Do you rememebr?

Chapter 71 and 72

By far the best epic space battle I've ever seen in a Star Fox fic, bar none. I love how it advances in stages, Bill defending Katina, then killing the node that used to be Drifter's Rock, then all of Corneria's fleet coming to bear on the Aparoids, the Aparoids winning the war of attrition, then Venom stepping in to help, then Fox finally saving the day at the end with the new Great Fox. Took me by surprise he chose to recreate his ship from the ground up. That was quite an awesome sight.

Also, I figured Fox and his teammates wouldn't reunite until the final battle, with how little they've been in the story. Too bad they didn't get to do a whole lot, but you did have a lot of ground to cover here so oh well. I wish Wolf got to be seen doing something though. He just kind of appeared and then you didn't really mention him again.

I loved how Bill called all his teammates by name, and he recalled details about them with every death.

Also, I was going to ask why you put the music recommendations at the end instead of the beginning, but then you explain in this chapter. Wouldn't it have made more sense to make that little notice earlier on? Like back in Chapter 38 with your first recommended music?

Epilogue

Like some of the others, I was hoping for a more bittersweet ending rather than nearly everybody pretty much getting exactly what they want and living happily ever after. Well, except Bill perhaps. He seemed to get the worst out of it. Ah well... All of these characters worked their asses off to get this good ending, so I think they deserve it.

WHen you mentioned in your profile you don't want to do anymore fanfiction, I felt sad at first. But now that I've reached the end, I can see that you really need a bigger stage. You're far too good to settle for simple fanfiction, so I say chase your dreams in getting a novel published.

It's not like there's much left for you to do with Star Fox after this story. You've included almost every major canon character and canon location in the game, referenced all the plots of all the games to hell and back, tied it all together with a nice big bow, and made a kickass story out of it. What's left after that?

I may post another review soon discussing the entire story as a whole.

Chapter 62

It was pretty cool having a Dash focused chapter, but I started cracking up partway through when I realized what his little thoughts to himself reminded me of. It sounds exactly like the Civil Rights Movement in the 60s, what Dash's father and himself seemed to be trying to achieve. Nonetheless it does make you believe in his cause more, rather than him simply being Andross 2.0 like one of the Command endings would have you believe.

The lore you're dropping on Corneria's history is interesting. However, I think you went on for too long about it, and I also think I'm ready for the story to just move towards its conclusion now. It's pretty late in the game to be getting even more exposition. Of course, you have to keep feeding us new things to keep us interested (like Chapter 60), but maybe the info about the kingdoms would have been better positioned earlier in the story. I did enjoy the parts about how the Simians ended up in the position they are now, and how that affected Dash, Oikonnoy, and Andross. But aside from that, the rest just didn't feel that important to me.

It was nice seeing Wolf again though, and what he's been up to. Although I don't think we really learn any new information from the conversation between Wolf and Dash, except for the fact we know now what Wolf was doing after he left McCloud on Fortuna.

The bit about masks at the end was great. I have to do that from time to time too, depending on who I'm talking to.

Chapter 63

Jesus, I was wondering why Vekkar was freaking out so much, but then kept reassuring himself the voices can't hurt him. What's going on with his hand explains it, but...damn. Wow. That's quite brutal.

So from what I understand in the 'light battle' (or that's what I've nicknamed it in my head) the red light wants to kill Fox, I guess? And it also wants to stop him from cleansing the Cypher. But with Loopy's and Orian's help, he managed to overcome that, cleanse the Cypher, and render the station dormant. Okay... Not sure why, and not sure why he's so sure James is in there, but I guess it will make sense once I read further. Also caught the reference to Fox descending into Venom.

I may have accidentally spoiled James appearing in this story though. I accidentally saw a review that mentioned he was here. Plus you've got him in the damn characters list so...kind of like a spoiler in plain sight, huh?

You know, the longer this story goes on, the harder it is for me to comment on it. I guess because everything kinda moves rather quickly from chapter to chapter, and it takes quite a bit of effort to simply keep up and digest all the new information the story keeps giving me.

Also, reading this story that took a decade to write over the space of a few months, I notice how your writing style changed over that time. It started to become more apparent when I noticed myself getting more and more tired the further I go. Granted though, part of this may be me getting fatigued from reading so much text over a few months' time.

But anyway, in the earlier chapters, I recalled your writing being a lot leaner and more to the point. I told you that I loved that, because it made this story very easy to quickly read. But in these later chapters you seem to dedicate massive paragraphs to just about everything, like Fox reflecting on what he did after he thought he saw his father's ghost in the tunnels under Venom. Or taking a while for Vekker to reveal what was under his glove. Or most of Chapter 60.

I don't like that. I preferred your leaner style from the earlier chapters. See, I like writing that gets to the point rather than being elaborate and flowery. Some people may feel the former style is boring, but the latter style just makes me think "Get on with it already!" And I find myself thinking that more often the further I go in Chaos Effect. The earlier chapters felt better balanced on how much text was dedicated to each element.

Well, I decided to read one more chapter before I went to sleep tonight. I wasn't much of a fan of 60 or the preceding few chapters, but the story feels like it's right back where it needs to be with 61.

That training sequence was super intense. Serious props to you to make Fox doing martial arts in a room all by himself seem so furious and venomous, even though no one is there. And you definitely revealed the cause with Fay. Like you said, Fox doesn't like being alone and he likes having problems to solve since they distract him from his failures in the past. You know, I think that happens to me a lot too since I spend most of my time alone. And I exercise too when I'm feeling pissed off about something, like for example before I sent you that PM earlier.

And you definitely took me by surprise with Oikonnoy. So, looks like Oikonnoy's not so sane after all, huh? And we finally get to see this damn Cypher too. That was quite the brutal fight as well. Was very telling how Andrew regained his senses at the very end and ordered Fox to put him out of his misery.

And oh shit, the Eye's here now huh? The thing everyone's been looking for. It seems that the Cypher did work insofar as bringing them the Eye. However, the things Aparoid Oikonnoy said were definitely rather...disturbing. Also, Fox looks like he's been modified again by his anima. I'm wondering what will be the consequences of this too.

I know I said I was going to be focusing on my own fic in the last couple reviews but...screw it. I can't get this story out of my mind. I decided to read a whole 'nother slew of chapters today. I considered trying to go all the way to the end today...but then I saw the length of the last couple chapters by checking the size of my scrollbar. I've decided I'll save my last reading session for those monster couple chapters towards the end.

On the bright side, I do feel much better now that I wrote you that PM. Writing that PM helped me sort through my feelings quite a bit.

Chapter 53

You said not to talk spoilers in this chapter, which is a shame. There's a lot I wanted to say here but it's rather difficult to do that with this limitation. I guess we could talk about this in PM later maybe though.

Without getting into specifics, I was thinking this story's canon character body count was going to be higher by the time we got here. Yet there's been relatively few casualties all things considered. Of course, you could start slaughtering people en masse towards the end. I've seen lots of books/tv shows/etc. where all the deaths are saved for the end where the author doesn't need the characters anymore, but I don't think they carry as much impact as a mid-story death.

You know, when I read the first bit between Vaccini and Horus, I was wondering if this chapter may have been even better if you'd left that out. I actually forgot Horus was mentioned way back earlier in the story until Roddick mentioned him again. This may have been a pretty big surprise.

Also, this is a very clever use you have of the nebulas here. Most Star Fox authors just ignore them.

Chapter 54

Another dream...but this one's much easier to follow. Obviously the angry phoenix is supposed to represent Fox when he comes to save the day later.

So now Vaccini is dealt with too, and it was a satisfying way for him to go too. He got his just desserts.

Now I see what you mean when you based the suit he's got in his body on Venom. It seems to be taking over his mind, especially with how Krystal needed to snap him out of his anger consuming him.

It's a good think Vekker intervened when he did a few chapters later. I'm a bit disappointed you took the suit away though. You surprised me when he showed up here. I thought Fox was just giving himself up to the CDF at first, but it turned out to be him. And it also makes sense he's here considering he was planning to take the Cypher back too.

Also, Krystal and Fox are sticking together this time now, for the first time in 54 chapters.

Chapter 55 and 56

Good update on what's going on back on Corneria. The riot ended up being a more peaceful affair than I thought it would be. You made a good decision not telling us that Bill was only there for the sake of intimidating the crowd, not actually using weapons on them. Also a good description of the mindset of a rioting mob.

I didn't mention this in my last review, but I'm guessing what led Jacques to becoming that monster was his near assassination attempt. The anima in his body took over to save his life, but then it took control of his entire body, and now he wants to raise up the Aparoids again. I'm guessing what's going on under that island is going to be the birth of a new army of Aparoids? Like they'll be the final antagonists of the story?

Chapter 57, 58, 59

I like how you strongly hint that while Vekker is helping out Fox and Krystal, you also leave the door open that he may not be their friend and might have his own agenda too. They seem to be warming up to him but...for all I know this could be just to get them to drop their guard.

Also, interesting that we get to see Orian 'in person' for the first time too, and we get a lot of backstory on him, and the significance of Loopy, and why Loopy is so important to what Vekker wants. That part about the multiple Orions talking in committees was actually pretty awesome.

I think I'd be pissed though (like Elarix) if I was reading this story as it got updated. Vekker strongly hinted he had a ton of information on the Progenitors and Vuplans...and then not a whole lot was said during these chapters. I don't think I have a lot else to say about these chapters, considering 60 spills all the beans on what's up here.

Chapter 60

So this is the second version of the chapter, and what you added on were visuals to provide more illustration for what Vekker was saying in 57-59. The illustrations do help to make the info dump in this chapter more palatable.

I'm actually a bit disappointed it's humans that are behind the whole thing. It makes the most sense but somehow it feels like a letdown. I was like "Oh, humans did it. Okay." Perhaps it's because I've seen this plot twist in a number of other sci-fi works already. Once you mentioned Earth, humans, and how they were the Progenitors, I filled in most of the blanks on my own long before Vekker did it for me.

Also, upon my first reading, I feel like this chapter could have been cut down significantly. Like instead of Vekker talking in a philosophical, dramatic tone at length he could have simply gotten straight to the point about certain things, like Fox asking why they have free will now when they used to be servants. Also, instead of going into detail about those three different branches of humanity, I think it would have been easier to just say "they wanted eternal life, so they created anima as part of their experiments." In the context of the story, that's really the only thing that seems to be important about that part.

Of course, I'm not finished with the story, so some of the lore may become important later. As it is now though, this chapter feels rather bloated and takes too long to get to the points it wants to make.

Chapter 51

You know, what happened to Jamison and the others at the end of this chapter could have been completely avoided if they'd just turned the freak around as soon as they felt something was wrong. Unless...whatever was in the air took control of them before they felt it was wrong? Really freaky the way this chapter was going anyway...broken down into raw genetic material and just stuffed on those machines by the Aparoids.

This feels like something from Halo, where the Flood will convert any they find into more Flood and use the bodies to assmeble Graveminds which become the leaders of the Flood. That's what this feels like to me. They seem to be putting all the nobles into that thing. I'm guessing it's for their knowledge. Probably would make it easier for them to achieve their goals.

Chapter 52

Interesting details about X and Z. However, while you can warp from X to Z in Star Fox 64, the warp gates seem to be an artificial construct built into the destroyed base itself...like they'd been built by Venomians before the base got destroyed. Or maybe the gates just take advantage of the natural warp energy of the location and harness it?

So I guess this is the part where Fox is going to confront Viccini, and Krystal being held hostage is going to come into play. Also, maybe Star Wolf's relationship to Viccini, considering Wolf name-dropped him back on Fortuna briefly. I think I'll leave off here for tonight. The next chapter looks rather long, going by the scroll bar's size.