A delightfully warped version of Wonderland that retains the childlike innocence of the characters mixed with a dark horror. Great until the whole buissness about the Jabberwocky being the Shadowland crown prince.

A magnificent Introduction ,my friend. There are no obvious flaws with this chapter.

I really, really like how you showed us Alice's love for he grandmother in that one exclamation point at the end of 'okay' when Alice Liddell, Sr. asks Alice Liddell, Jr. to get the photo albums. (It is also one of the things I love about writing. You can change everything with a well placed comma.)
I think you sometimes had the White Rabbit asume things too quickly, like when he asked, "Is Alice Liddell your grandmother?" It would have been more realistic for him to ask 'mother' or not understand.
The showing of Time in a way that we can remember him, but not in a way that he would be in the front of our minds constantly until you show him was amazing.
The cliffhanger and Alice's grasp for Bob (reality) is a nice ending that makes you want to read more.

Oh my goodness! So good! I am going to immediately read your sequal and I can't wait! I loved how you didn't make sides for evil/good. The Jabberwocky being Alice's 'father'-just plain amazing! The Hatter really scared me, but thats good. There should always be one person who scares you. I didn't really understand the begining or Chapter 39 and Alice seemed a bit too naive. But all in all (I love that phrase!) it was a magnificent story!

Random comment: Although they in no way match (at least appearance-wise) the version of the characters you've created here, I keep thinking of the Mad Hatter and March Hare - in this chapter, at least - as the versions of the characters from "Dreamchild." Can't really say why...if you haven't seen that movie, I'd highly recommend it. Just don't watch it on YouTube if you can help it: the picture quality is awful. VeeHD, I know, has it available for a free download. (Or you can get an account there and stream it. Take your pick.)

Random comment completed.

Ahem...anyway, I never noticed before, but, although I favorited this story a while back, I never reviewed it. I have to admit this is my favorite chapter; it's disturbing as can be, but, for some reason, there's still a sense of sympathy I feel towards the characters. The cat as a tiger is kind of neat...and that's just in the third chapter! Having read this story through to the end, I feel like the twists (no pun intended) are well-placed...although, I must confess, the fact this is only rated T bothers me a bit; some things in here seem like straight M material, in terms of horror.

Oh, well. Bravo to you for a good story! :)

Sincerely yours,
J.

I'm retreading this story for about the fifth time. I really enjoy reading it and know that it is a great read that I can keep coming back to. Thank you!

Its a good story besides the little errors. Alice seemed older than 15 at times and other times like 4.

I loved this! I'm so excited about the sequel! Thank you!

Alright, so far... I can't say that I love this. It's rather gruesome, and I think some of Alice's reactions were a bit off. I would have freaked out a LOT more than she did. (How old is she, anyways?) And I wouldn't exactly call them 'maniacs'. I'd call them CANNIBALS.

Your story is absolutely FULL of errors and typos, and the beginning seemed slightly rushed. Quite a bit of this is a little confusing, and it might help to explain a few points.

Also, one thing that bugged me- I believe it was chapter 3, but you mentioned some named 'Mariah'. Did you mean March? I had absolutely no idea what you might be referring to until you wrote 'The assassins glared at each other.'

I loved your story! I have to admit, I was skeptical at first but the farther I got in the story, the more I fell in love with it. Thank you for such a wonderful read.

I really liked the ideas and thought you put into the plot for this story. The only thing that bothered me was that there seemed to be no character development in Alice. Her only characteristic seemed to be ‘nice’. It seemed like she was always bending to the will of the other characters and not really developing any opinions of her own. And things that would bother her in the moment, like Hatter and March eating her mum’s boyfriend, didn’t bother her after or leave any scaring effects on her personality. I understand she didn’t like the guy but I still think she should have been even a bit jaded after witnessing a scene like that.

Anyways, other than that I really like your story. It’s an interesting twist to the Wonderland tale and I really liked the morbid Hatter and March. You took ‘mad’ to a whole other level to which I greatly enjoyed. It makes me look forward to how Alice will transition from being disturbed and fearful of Hatter’s love, to loving him in return in the sequel.

It took me three days to read this but I say...woah...

Well as a fan of Alice let me say that you did a brilliant job! It took me a while to read to the end coz i had to wait to read chapters. (Taken me a month to read due to school) I shall start the sequel tomorrow. You have a wonderful imagery in your writing. Some small grammatical errors but nothing major.

10/10!

:D you made something thats supposed to be slighty terrifying and dreary actually bright and rather humorous (

Lovely! :D