Hi, I just read your story Slave.
I found it by chance, but it was so enthralling that I couldn't stop reading.
Thank you. Especially for the happy ending.
Take care!

This was a swell story and well worth the read :)
I dont know if you are still writing but if you ever get the chance a good sweep through to correct a few errors would help future readers understand some parts in the story.
Overall it was a happy and devistating story in my opinion. Good job. Poor Obi-Wan. Life never seems to be good for him in anyones mind...
MTFBWY

I know this fic is old, but I still love it! It still gives me a heartache and happiness everytime I read it. Please, keep up the good work

Great story, thank you for writing for us.

Awesome story!

A happy ending indeed. Well done! I enjoyed this story very much.

Thank you for sharing.

"So in other words if Obi-Wan moves, it could kill him?"

*Gapes at the author* You... you... You wouldn't dare to leave him a cripple, right? Right?

'However, the Obi-Wan who stood before the council now, was confident of his place in the order, and no escaped criminal would make him shy away from his duty as a Jedi.'

Yay! Good for Obi-Wan.

"We must capture him and send him back to prison, before he can hurt anyone else."

In Gerota's case, I think capturing him will not be enough, though.

'Gerota shuddered, sliding down the wall, and then he died.'

Finally! He was one very creepy character.

'Abruptly, Mace and the other Councillors sensed wild and chaotic emotions radiating from Obi-Wan, even Qui-Gon sensed trepidation from his Padawan.'

Well, I sure hope that 'even' Qui-Gon senses turmoil in his apprentice. After all, the training bond is there for something :) At least they know the nature of the threat, now.

Obi-Wan's introduction to life is chilling.

'Is it just me, or have we all become so uncaring and so uncompassionate that we do not see these children as anything but little Jedi. Are we teaching them to be uncaring, hard, and sceptical beings?'

Oh... That is indeed a danger of taking the children solely for the purpose of making them... whatever the society of the time needs them to be. They are used, not loved. Great point.

Good job with giving Obi-Wan a rebirth of a king. In the real life, without the Force and the magic, it takes a little longer :)

"Thank you Master, yet I wonder how you will survive, if you aren't there to hold my hand."

LOL!

Qui-Gon smiled. "Now if only Obi-Wan would wake up, we could get our lives back on track."

Hmm. That's too fast, Qui-Gon. Just because you want it, doesn't mean Obi-Wan wants or is ready for it too. The boy calls him 'Sir', for Forth sake!

'He closed his eyes and delved into Obi-Wan's mind, coming to the place where their bond had been. It was splintered, and there appeared to be a void – a gaping hole in his soul. Qui-Gon pressed his mind to the spot. He brought with him the flickering candle light, which was what remained of his end of the bond.'

Oh, beautiful image.

'Obi-Wan was huddled near the tree stump, shaking and full of self-loathing Qui-Gon was standing at the edge of the bushes shattered and disgusted with himself.'

Oh my. Those two need to find healing. I hope they will.

'All these years, Qui-Gon had held onto the charred remnants of his bond with Xanatos. He realised that he had to purge the ash and soot from his mind – virtually sweep it clean, and make it inviting and welcome for Obi-Wan.'

Nice imagerie. Nice chapter. I wonder if Gerota's obsession with Obi-Wan will come to fruition in the later chapters.

Oh, and there were a couple of question marks missing :

"Did Gerota have an unhealthy desire for Obi-Wan," Master Gallia questioned.

"When will the sentencing transpire," she asked.

Thank you for sharing

'Obi-Wan watched as Qui-Gon left the stables. He had a bad feeling, and wondered if this day would be his last. He had prepared for three years for this day. He knew that one day he would break his silence and tell Gerota to go to Hell. He also knew the day he did it, he would die.'

*claps cheerfully* Go Obi-Wan, tell him!

Glad to see that the boy is not completely broken, after all. Yay!

'His time had come – he was free. He would dwell in the garden of peace and tranquillity forever.'

Sniff. Qui-Gon should have deflected that blast from Obi-Wan. Sniff.

Good chapter!

'Gerota ran his hands over Obi-Wan, who had reverted to his submissive stance. "Let me look at you, Boy." Obi-Wan lifted his head up, keeping his gaze down. "Gods, you are beautiful! I am so fortunate to have such an obedient slave."'

Argh! Twisted, obsessed freak!

"No, Sir. I was never really your apprentice. I knew that, deep down, you did not want me. I felt it in everything you said to me. The Council didn't want me either. They wanted to send me to the Agri Corps. They forced you to take me. I heard Master Yoda telling you to take me. When I disobeyed you on Melida/Dann and you silenced the bond, I knew I was doomed. But Cerasi made me feel wanted…needed. I liked her a lot. She made me feel good about myself, and even Neild seemed to like me. They appreciated that I had stayed to help. When Cerasi died, I think a part of me died as well. She was the first person I ever met who liked me because of me, not because I was a Jedi. Then I turned to Neild, because I also thought he was my friend." Obi-Wan snorted. "That's when Obi-Wan Kenobi died."

Wow! Obi-Wan is very articulate for someone in his position, articulate in a good way, saying what's in his heart. A pity that there is only devastation

Good chapter!

Nevertheless, he is not for sale at any price. He is mine, and he will stay mine until the day he dies. That's right, isn't it, Boy?" The slave simply nodded, much to Qui-Gon's frustration.

Obi-Wan nodded? He agrees? That's... that's sad.

'The slave had prepared himself for the predictable beating. He expected punishment. He deserved it. It was as it should be.'

Oh, no. Obi-Wan is truly broken, then?

I liked the fact that Qui-Gon seemed to see Obi-Wan in every slave he encountered.