Firstly, well-written. Never would have figured that it was translated. All critic-ness aside-I really like this ending alot better then the one in FIREWING. So, thanks from one sucker for happy endings to another.

Aww, this is SO much better than the bitter-sweet ending of Firewing! It was really short, and I wish there had been more details, but as you have already said, this was earlier in your writing... career? adventure? Dang it, English language, why don't you have more words? D: ( Perhaps I just had a random instant of forgetting vocabulary words. Oh well, moving on...)

I thought this was how Firewing should have ended. It would have made I, and a lot of Shade fans, much happier. *sigh* If only. Anyway, I think you did a good job on this overall. Any advice would be futile, since you've improved so much from this already awesome fic. So, I shall say, continue on with your awesome writing child. Continue on!

(P.S. I've read nearly all of your Sonic fanfictions, but haven't reviewed one yet because I'm normally speechless after reading their awesomeness ;) Just felt like letting you know that ;) )

I really liked it, it was cute and I was really depressed when Shade died in Firewing, I was actually pretty upset. I think this would have been a nice ending if it had been the end of the series, but Kenneth Oppel still has some books to go since Goth was revived off Griffin's life. So I get the feeling that Shade being dead but still being able to watch over Marina and Griffin will play a part at somepoint, and I hope Marina gets a bigger part then she did in Firewing...

Anyways, excellent story!

Kipcha

What a heart-warming ending. It was written EXACTLY like Kenneth Oppel would write it. I can't wait till you post your next Silverwing story, maybee you could give me some hints on my Silverwing story. :)

Very nice. Great job with the emotions and narrative.

this one was cool. I liked the way in which you portrayed it, as if shade was stuck in spiritual limbo. But I wanted a story in which the humans could redeem themselves (cause we really aren't all that bad) Perhaps translation of the bat language to human is the key...

Have to say, I far prefer this to the original ending. I hated the ending of Firewing-Shade was too awesome to die, and that afterlife just sucked. Even if this is one of your older stories, it's very well-written-beautiful ending to a story that shouldn't have ended the way it did.

perfect, never seen a well written story like that in a long time.

Good job! Yeah, I can imagine that translating is hard to do-not that I have done that before.

Before I start, I must tell you that I had no idea this was a translation. You write english very well. What is your first language, if I may ask?

To the story. It's a good alternate ending and fits into the story nicely.

Your writing style is good. Of course, like every other fanfic author, it could be better. I suggest using more inversions and different sentence structures and widening your vocabulary. I do think you could flesh out the paragraphs some more-just more detail. Also, the first lines in at the begining of the story are just kinda floating there. You should combine them into a real paragraph.

I like your characterization of Shade and Noctura. Using the parts of bats that Shade admires/loves is a nice touch because Noctura would very much appreciate that.

When Shade finds Marina and Griffin, you should have put in some of their thoughts. I know that the focus of this fanfic is Shade, but these are his mate and child. They should have some sort of reaction other then a "surprised cry". Something like disbelief-maybe Griffin had already told Marina that Shade gave him his life. Something like that.

This is definitely a good piece, but it not could be editted and made better. I hope this was helpful. Happy typing to ya!

You shoulkd continue this story. It's really good.

Goodness gracious, me! A translation? I never would have thought! Such a superb way of bringing Shade back to life, it sounded like Kenneth Oppel himself were trying to rewrite everything to a happier ending.

Altough, I should point out one thing, Shade was never there to see Dante, and had never heard of him, that was Griffin. If you were going to have it differently, you could have said that Griffin had mentioned Dante to Shade.

But, overall, quite exquisite. I especially enjoyed when Shade gave Nocturna a "body", it was... surprising, better than anything I could have come up with, I can tell you.

~(Zealak Silverdirk)~

Wow, this is one of the best Silverwing fanfictions I think I've ever read, despite the happy ending and all, lol.

The writing style is very good, /especially/ considering that you had to translate it from your first language. I salute you for it! *salutes*

The detail is incredible, you describe everything with an accuracy that most proffesional authors aren't capable of, in my opinion, anyway. The only thing I would point out is that at some points the story seemed a little rushed. It would seem more real if it took longer to read I think.

Anyhoo, that's just what I think. Don't take anything I say to heart if you're happy with your story as it is. I would be Great job!

thank you... I really hated the ending for Firewing. I just was so mad at Shade for killing himself, although I know he did it for Griffin, I kept wanting to change the end. So I really really like this story! It's written really well, too.

This is a really good story. It was very creative of you and I look forward to more of your stories.