Wow. This is so classic. It's the most hilarious parody version of a horrendous cliche and it nearly killed me with laughter. PLEASE write another chapter?

This is good. You've inserted a Mary Sue warrior who is completely undefeatable, and a bumbling sidekick who is the real main character. You've even included the plot device of "mysteriously" ending up in another world.

In case you're stuck for ideas, put a bunch of fangirls into the world of Redwall, let them scream about it for a few chapters, then make their lives come to a violent, abrupt and permanent end.

*falls out of her chair laughing*

*crawls back up and rereads*

*repeats process many times*

This is lovely, as usual. You do, indeed, have some spelling mistakes which can be distracting, but Mack is a fabulous character. I hope he finds his aspirin!

Also, HypoCritic? I think you should read your reviews out loud, at least once, before you submit them. You used "their" instead of "they're" and "unlock" when I believe you meant to use "unlike." Or were you just living up to your name?

Neat. A pretty well done flow from one end to the other, and I do enjoy reading about Mack; he seems like the sort who would like hockey, though as a spectator, not a player. That's always a good quality in a character.

I also want to say that while your writing is among the upper echelons of this site as far as grammar is concerned, there's always room to improve. That said, read over what you type, at least once out loud. You've separated a few compound words that oughtn't be, and tagged some 's's on words that shouldn't have had them. Also, and though it was probably some uncommon typographical error for you, watch the possessive on the word 'its.' It only needs the apostrophe for the contracted, 'it is.' Otherwise, let it lie.

The dialogue was done well in this chapter; I like the exchanges between Sharang(?) and Mack. There is always some measure of humor to be found in bombastic monologues, especially when their coming from an idiot.

Which reminds me! Great introduction for this chapter. If you had made the writing even more florid, it would've added to the effect you achieved with the abrupt change of style (which be the way, seems to be leaning overall towards a dryness not unlock Douglas Adams, which is where many attempts at comedy seem to end up lately. Yours is well done so far, but don't let it spoil).

And that's about all I have to say. Glad to see you decided to continue your story, so until next time.

It's a parody. Please tell me this is a parody. It has to be a parody.

If it is, you're doing a fine job of it and you should continue.

If it's not...let's not go there, shall we?

Still, it was quite funny.

This is funny. Do you want something more constructive? Too bad. The only way this could be funnier is if someone got smacked upside the head with a salmon. I love your not-exactly-disguised rant about the stupid self righteous bints. Keep it up!

Vlad the Bad seems to be all we need in a villan! Prone to monologuing and nottoo bright, huzzah!

My Cossacks have a date with the Pope!

This is the best random humor fiction I've ever read in my... what, four month membership? Yeah. It's good, update!

Nice! I hope it doesn't sound patronizing, but this is excellent parody. I'll admit I was skeptical, and the mention of disco made me cringe just a tad, but the mental image of anyone (let alone a talking rodent) moonwalking to safety is just a bucket of chuckles.

I can see this is going to be laden with random references and jabs, but I do hope you'll try to keep it free of such jokes to the point where it loses all direction, as some other parodies tend to do.

Overall, some brilliant stuff; hope you can (and will) keep it up. I'll got some more feedback and praise and all sorts of other nice things for you if you do, so don't slink away! It's awful when authors do that, and even worse when the better ones do.

Till your next update-