Nice opening descriptions, I like the attention to details. Good tone perhaps install stronger emotions. Nice description of the room, great diction. I love the sombre mood, aww poor flowers. Nice analogy with the cards. Maybe watch out for potential grammar issues but the plot is incredibly intriguing. I like how you mentioned Haru and Rin, very cute. I like Kureno's and Hatori's nonverbal communication, expertly handled. Great characterization but you need more depth.

Yay I like how Hatori's emotion seems to spark like that, I really like him. Excellent diction and figurative language. This feeling is so scary to be surreal to all of it but I really love reading it XD. Aww, the Shigure-Hatori interaction is so cute but the characterization on Shigure could use some work. I love the part at the end with Aya, so cute. That ending line was so random but the one before it was a perfect close.

Great work

~Myst

oh boy...Tequila is a very bad idea...leads to many inexcuseable moments... *accidentally flashes back to a heavy make out session with Kureno*...yeah...

That was absolutely amazing. I haven't been reading a lot of fanfiction lately, I despaired of finding anything decent, but this is a GREAT reintroduction. This was beautiful. I couldn't see a single flaw. You dealt with their relationships in such a deft and intelligent way, it's all very complicated and hard to understand but you did it wonderfully. I adored this fic, and I'm favoriting it. Great job.