Dunno if you still check reviews for this fic, but anyway, i wanted to let you know this is awesome! Found your fanfic on your daughter's profile (i had just read her new fic and had commented on it) and decided to give it a go. You really stay true to Eiri's character. I always love to imagine what is not said in the anime (or manga). And i always loved those few seconds showing Eiri missing Shuichi (when he looks at the seat next to him and it's empty) and always loved to imagine his thoughts at that precise moment and some other ones. Well,you've just put into words what i had in mind and you've done it very nicely. I love your writing style! Shame you didn't write other fanfics! Ps. I find it really cute you share your daughter's "obsession"! I know no one who's a Gravitation fan here. My husband couldn't be bothered. But my mother -who's 54- came to visit us last week (i don't see her often and had never talked about gravitation before): I played Gravitation songs on the piano and she loved "Sleepless beauty". She wanted to know more about it, so I showed her some anime extracts, my artbooks, my Kumagoro plush... and she really liked it and even said she'd like to watch the anime someday! :-) pps. Sorry if i talk too much! ps. Write another fic! I'm adding this one to my fav!

HI MOM~!

Why do you write better fan fiction than me? This is something I find unfair. D:

You portray Yuki's personality really well! I always love stories that fill in the gaps that are made from where there is no narration in a story; such is the case with this plot right here. :3

You should write more stories! Just like I should get to work and post some! xD

BRILLIANT! I love how you convey Eiri's thoughts and feelings. It's really in character and that really drives the story. It's really hard to find a good story from Eir's point of view nowadays, so I do hope you continue this. :)

I'm sorry I've missed this - I've been scouting backwards, trying to find decent Grav fics (not easy at the moment, if I'm brutally honest) and I found this!

It's really, really excellent. For a start, your writing is of the highest quality. The pacing is excellent - it's not easy to keep someone's interest when there's hardly any dialogue, but you managed it.

I am fond of what our dear Vindalootoo calls "Between the Lines" stories in general, but what I really loved about this is that you have obviously paid close attention to the manga (and the anime) and really understood it (at least as I interpret it!) You haven't dismissed Eiri as a complete bastard who doesn't realise his feelings for Shuichi until some crisis happens; you've shown him as doing what I thought both formats made clear - trying to protect Shuichi from himself and the disaster he thinks he brings to those he loves.

It's so clear you've thought this story out carefully, drawing on small scenes and conversations from the original. I loved in particular Eiri's memories of Shuichi sitting beside him as he worked (Eiri's glance at the empty chair in the anime, though in an earlier part, came to mind here!) and the idea of Shuichi's energy and warmth and the void left behind when they're gone.

You've really said so much I want to say - I feel like you've pulled this out of my brain! (So if it ever seems like my future stories are too much like this, I swear it's a coincidence!) I really hope you'll write more - so many fanfics (for me, anyway) concentrate on silly pairings or portraying Yuki as a complete sod or Shuichi as a hyperactive moron - we need more like THIS!

It rocked!

Yay! Your first Gravi fic...and well done. You've a lovely way with words, excellent grammar, and the viewpointing is very smooth. Yuki's core dilemma at this juncture is very nicely handled.

Love the ending. (Go get him, Hiro!)

Good job!

Two small suggestions...(a) when you have a time/scene break (like when Yuki leaves for lunch which then segues to his disgust with lunch) put in some sort of visual alert. In a novel, this would simply be a line drop, but that's not practical here. Personally, I use a funky asterisk, but anything to indicate a break is useful. Otherwise the reader has to stop and think about the relationship of one paragraph to another.

(b) You've got some pretty long paragraphs, which gets a bit hard to read online. Not surprising in an introspective, limited dialog piece like this, but don't be afraid to break them up at any excuse.

Small. very small, details in a very nicely written piece! Thanks for posting!