Not exactly a big fan of the rewrite you have going. I much preferred what you originally had (with Kaiba's sadism, Jounouchi's psyche, and Honda actually having more than just a mention), butheck it's your pen and your story.

I'll keep following the rest to see how it turns out

And the snark about put in dangerous situatiojns back!

First of all, Bakura is the cutest thing since the invention of teddy bears. I love how Jou and her father mothers him...The mental image of Jou shooing away his hoards of fangirls keeps plaguing my mind. Not to mention, Jou and her dad tending to his wounds. ;w;

Layla's character grows quite a bit too with her knowledge of all things mysterious.

Yami and Yugi finally get their shit together, too. Time to take on Pegasus

The plot thickens...with the awesomeness of Death-T.

I really love tongue-in-cheek the characters are in this chapter. I mean, death-themed attractions are pretty sketchy.

The Kaiba brother's creepiness is highlighted here and it'll be interesting to see how their relationship goes through trials and tribulations, as well as their connection to Jounouchi.

Layla's mysterious actions are starting to creep up on the plot now, too, which is pretty neat.

Very very interesting. I liked it a lot.

I really like how Yugi & co's reputation around school hasn't gone unnoticed. With Yami dishing justice around, it's realistic to assume that sketchy things happen around them. Kaiba not taking the rumors is a serious turning point in his life, especially with his disappearance shrouded in mystery.

Jounouchi and Kaiba's initial interaction is a neat set-up. They didn't exactly start hating each other but they didn't hit it off, too. Of course, with the brief-case smack, being a total shit to Yugi and his grandfather, and the impending doom of Death-T, that'll probably change.

Yami's relationship with Kaiba would also prove to be intriguing. Needless to say, Kaiba's a sick bastard for enjoying that Shadow Game...seriously. xD Gives more of a reason for Yami to be fascinated by the guy.

Finally, Yugi's still cute as a button. It's great that he's gotten more awareness over his darker half, even if he can't control him. Snuggly dragons are an awesome source of comfort, anyway

This is very interesting. I like your interpretation of events. Especially of Yugi and Yami's relationship.

Love the backstory of Jou’s home life. Yeah, Hiratani’s shadiness is really creepy and disgusting. Thank God for Layla’s influence. The call backs to her half-American ethnicity is great it points out how fucked up Hirutana really is. And ugh, rape imagery…this is intense.
Ahaha, love the cliffhanger. Yes, children’s card games ahoy!

All In all, an excellent installment. The drama and suspense was great—so was the emotional highs and lows.

Honda's characterization is nice. I like the fact that he's given more of a backstory, and a compelling and realistic one at that. Girl gangs are awesome. It's like a fun mix of Season 0 and the manga version of Honda, only with more purpose other than being a cheerleader of Yugi and co's adventures.

Jou's personal life is more and more intriguing, I love the callback to fact she's partly responsible for paying her father's debts, therefore, picking up jobs whenever she can. It's a sacrifice for her own so-called teenage life for real world adult issues. And hints that she's of mixed-ethnicity/race is lovely.

Again, I like how Anzu is less incompetent and more of a good friend in Yugi and Jou's circle. The jabs at the girls being lesbians made me laugh. Ah well, people are jerks.

The ending was perfectly angsty but it all came together with Anzu and Jou being sweet people. Poor, poor Yugi. Yami being a total douchecanoe amused me well enough, though.

I know you heard my opinion before, but I'll post an actual review. Woohoo for the revision! I'm really touched at some of the ideas that you incorporated from me when it came to Jounouchi (e.g. the name change and skirt thing). And that you went into greater detail with the character motivations! It makes your story come off fresh and different, standing out from the original series. It's not just a mere genderswap, and it's a neat expansion on the series as a whole.

Speaking of which, It's a blast getting into Yami's head as well. His level of crazy is enjoyably horrific and it's good to see Yugi's friends wise up to his change.

PLEASE WRITE MORE OF THIS PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE! I LOVE IT! and please make a yugi/yami a couple X3

this is one of the most kick ass stories i've read on fanfiction. can't wait for more!

I should have probably reviewed this first. xD

Lovely characterization. The manga is kick ass. I love how Jou stays true to her character, despite her sex change. I'm also hooked to this story. :]

that was nice

It's an interesting story, but you skip around a lot and I don't understand what's going on half the time. Granted, I've never read the manga or saw this part of the series, but that's still basing it all on the assumption that all your readers have. A bit more detail would be nice, like what happened after Yugi and the others saved Jou from her old gang or what happened in the room with her and the Chopman and what Johji was doing during the fight. Otherwise, it kinda looks rushed.

Don't get me wrong, I like the story. I just think I'd enjoy it more if it were more detailed in some areas and wasn't skipped around so much.

Wow, this is the 1st time i seen a female joey fic. It's VERY interesting, im hooked on ur story. Im looking 4ward 4 more! update soon asap plz!"