I loved this! I'm more of an Atton/Exile shipper myself, but I was curious about the Mical/Exile pairing and I wanted to see how others dealt with it, and this made me kind of ship them.

horrible, the dixciple lost it, dang...

i like how the disciple was fighting with himself on what to do and i like how cold the exile was to him :)

That's so sad. :(

Evil Disciple isn't good, but I have a feeling that side of him is in there. So sad, though...

And what a repulsive Exile Alia is! Viewing Mical as obscene? How revolting.

This was an... interesting fic. I enjoyed this very much, even the Exile Alia.

...Yay?

He lost, but he also won... So confused~

I like it :) It was really good, and so true. Poor Deciple never gets any love~!

Cool story. Disciple's misguided thoughts are well-realized and have a "logic" to them that's believable. Nicely done.

Great story! thanks so much for writing this! God bless!

Why would we have been disappointed in it? Who told you that you are a crappy writer? Because they lied. I'm envious. Your writing has more feeling in it, better flow, than mine will ever have. Want proof? cariniabean. If you're the one telling yourself that, stop it. You don't know me, so I guess I can't expect you to follow that advice, but seriously, you are not the one to judge your own work. Because NO ONE is EVER happy with their own work. There's always something else they could have done better, differently, etc. If there was something wrong here, I'd let you know. I have no problem pointing out problems, giving real critcism. But you did well. My only criticism is this terrible self doubt; it makes me very sad...it makes me doubt myself, too. You have no reason to doubt.

Also wanted to say, one of your reviewers, the one hung up on cliches (which, by the way, the things he lists there aren't necessarily cliche), sounds like one of mine. "Where's all the 'saber fighting, Star Wars is about action..." whine whine whine. Seriously, I watch Star Wars to see if Han will realize, five minutes sooner, that he's in love with Leia; to see whether or not she'll still call him 'nerf herder' this time or finally give in. I don't really care about the fighting. But I swear this one reviewer is obsessed. That and women who are too strong or something. And too many emotions get him down, too. There's one in every bunch! Remember the good reviews, of which there are...14 out of 15! We're not idiots, our opinions are valid, too. And we liked your story! Loved it, in fact, enough to beg for more, judging from your reviews.

So, do I get a reward for my awful long review? Hm. ;) Smile a little, and give yourself some credit. It can't rain all the time... *

Ooh...that was great! I like how the disciple sees Atton's attitude as cocky and arrogant and infuriating. And the voice, the ever present voice of the darkness (or Kreia? Hm...). Off to see if you wrote anything else. :)

Oh.. I desPISE the Disciple. I don't know what those stupid developers were THINKING when they put THAT rat in. He's too... noble. Atton is so much hotter. I am delighted Disciple died, morbid me. I have some slight issues here. One, Exile sounds suspiciously like a Sue. Not outright, but a subtle hint here and there gave it away. Work on that. Two, slight misspellings lightly sprinkled here and there, but that's just my picky self. Three, overused themes, in example "emerald eyes" "etched on her face." Four, I have no idea what more to say. Nice, intriguing. Good finish.

I loved seeing the different take with a jealous Disciple. His thoughts were so twisted and dark. I liked your writing. The conflicting thoughts during the Sion scene were very good. I like how he went back and forth with pity and hate. And it was a perfect ending to the hopeless love you portrayed.

Great story! There were a few errors here and there, but wonderful nonetheless.

I really like this! Its too often we hear of Atton being jealous of the Exile and Mical spending time together, it was a refreshing change to hear it from Mical's POV. Your writting style is fine, its descriptive without being long winded and your writting is done with a sense of purpose. Something i worry that i don't have, lol.

Don't worry that your stuff isn't good enough, cuz its great!

I'd really like to see more from you :D

Jess

Oof, love it.

I despise Disciple's character in this perhaps more than I do in the game... not sure whether that was intended or not but smeh, it made it more of a fun read .

Poor Atton [

I love the thoughts of the Disciple as he's dying. Normally I'd be glad to see him dead (oh, how I hate him) but this made me kinda gutted for Atton's sake, which is an awesomely presented twist in my view ]

I fear I have rambled on more than I should but I loved it :)

Even Gods Dream

I really enjoyed it. I thought it was well written and I was not at all disappointed at the ending. It was very cool. I just wish that the fic would have been longer... I wanted to see how he got this plan in his head, and more of his jealousy growing. I just wish it would have been longer. But i still loved it!