wish there was more chapters
but your spaceing was atrocious
you really need to learn how to properly space a paragraph and when to start a new paragraph
hears a hint its not in the middle of a sentence

I like this story!

This $hit isn't getting updated, is it?

HEy HEy I like the pairing and your story, are you going to update?

I love the fic! Please continue your story ASAP! I love to see Keiichi and Mara kissing each other. :)

hey not a bad way to go with this, I like the fact that your dragging it out a little bit..but if I could make a suggestion, your sentences tend to run together without to much space between the context, now please don't take this as a flame because its not I like your story I would just like you to consider a beta reader and I would be more than happy to help with that.

Wopw you should really do some more chapters it's so good. In fact it's the second story I like on the web site. Congrads.

next chapter please

It was really cool but YOU CAN'T SPELL! Sorry. The story is good but it almost sounds like you are copying from some of the books. If I could give it a rating it would be 7/10

i like what your doing so far but maybe mara should get saved by Keiichi to fall in love!

_ Wow, that was very well done; I like your writing style. And what a cool pairing, too! I was just wondering... do you think you could do an OMG story with Hild in it...?

I loved the first chapter. Even though it was soshort. reading the first sentences really got you into the story. i have read the real book-Oh My Goddess (no offense to your book/chapter) and this one seems like it would be much more exciting. all in all it's a really great first chapter.

hm...where r u going to go from here? i guess its a surprise but i cant wait to c how u put this 1 together!

ill be a waitin for the next! XP

it is nice to see more non offical pairings around. :):):) I don't feel lonely at all anymore! Want to join my C2?