I'm only here for the . I live off of

Most of the cliches/problems you expressed in this story I think about too. You didn't touch on the Metroid fanfics where Samus is CRAZY and has skitzophrenia (however you spell that), which I think would have been funny. Like I said, this pointed out some things I've had in my head too, so it's nice to see someone else thinks how I do.

now i don't like fanfics but this is not the normal creepy kind this is funny if you have played metroid this is humorous. but if not it will still be funny and make you want to play metroid

great story. very good humor and wit. especially loved the parts where she gets news about her new mission, and when she has ridley scatter her items XD. keep writing!

I liked it. I have always wondered about some parts in Metroid, like the Torizo, Chozo stuff, and I love the takes you have done here like Ridley hiding the items. The casul conversations are fun too read too, oh and a quick suggestion, The mystery of the Deleter from Metroid Other M, another mystery for them too ramble on about

Hmm. I must say your writing IS impressive. Hehe, acting like one of those selfish snobs who think they pwn is fun. Overall, great story, it couldn't be more canon, I especially liked the:

"Can you take all the powerups from my suit and scatter them in well-defended and difficult to reach locations where I can only access with my most recently obtained item and is guarded by a one-of-a-kind creature which can only be defeated by said item?"

That was gold, considering how annoying it can be to find a weapon, but to get THAT weapon you need another powerup, but to get the powerup you need a weapon. This experiance is derived from Echoes, and I'm only exaggerating how frustrating it can be. Well, at least to my little bro, who isnt all to bright.

And Samus is a lesbian? To think of that, it's so weird.

Oh and the U-Mos part was also good. Along with the Chozo/chozeri debate.

The dragon snorted. "Me? It seems like you're the one who's paranoid about someone discovering your 'secret identity'. I remember when you didn't want anyone to know that you're female, or even human!"

Samus turned red and she crossed her arms defiantly over her chest. "I didn't want anyone to see me all feminine and fleshy. It...ruins my dangerous and mysterious aura!"

Ridley rolled his eyes. "'Dangerous and mysterious aura' my butt. You grew up among the Chozo. I don't know what sort of taboos or standards they maintain, but I really don't think they socialized you to be secretive, stoic, or bad-ass."

This part was really funny, it relates to Metroid alot, along with Samus dying her hair. So anyway, I liked it. Was that long enough to not get you ped off? XD.

Oh, this is a gem. How did I overlook this for three years?

(You know, I'm actually pretty sure I'm responsible for the popularity of the Samus/Ridley pairing - I mean, I didn't write the first fic with them, but I was slightly inspired by the first (which had a rather icky vore theme). I dropped the vore crap, added amnesia, and the rest is history).

Very entertaining :D

First things first, the story is hilarious. As Exilo mentioned, it does bear some resemblance to YGO: The Abridged Series, but then again, it was the intended idea.

Your grammar and spelling were great. I don't think I caught a single error at all. Some of the scenes could have gone for more description, but on the other hand, this might ruin it, as most fanfics have poor description.

Reading through the other reviews, I find myself agreeing with many of them - and yourself for that matter. Everyone sees Samus a little differently then the next, and it it those ideas that are being expressed in their stories.

As I've said other places, I'm not really in to the whole Metroid universe. I enjoy watching my brother play and help with some of the puzzles, but I'm no good at first-person-shooters, as I see Metroid (Prime series, mostly) from time to time. But I do like the universe and the stories, I loved how you could learn a lot of background story in Prime 12 (chozo, Space Pirates, Luminoths). I loved all that.

But many of you bring up a discussion about Samus; whether she is a caring or homicidal person. I'll admit that I don't have nearly enough insight to venture a guess, but I'll go with the justice belief. Why? She's a Bounty Hunter, but when was the last time she got paid?

Back on track, I think you did a fantastic job. You hit most fanfics right on and, let's face it, they exist in every community. Exploding Deku Nut made a similar over Zelda, where Link and crew (even Ganondorf) got together at Link's house and read fanfics and commenting upon them. They also made another cool one where they really build the tension, setting the scene for teh climatic battle between Link and Ganondorf... only to bring it all come crashing down by making them send out cuccos that worked like Pokémon. Yup, I kid you not.

I'm not good at staying on track, am I? Long review short: you did a great job, don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Good writing.

PS: just to go along with some of the others, I'll throw in a link for a Metroid fic I wrote only a few days ago. It's a one-shot, at 1.500 words. It revolves around Samus and is titled 'Flight of the Huntress.' You'll have to read it to learn more. /s/4648892/1/

LOL! This is awesome, perfect parody that I could picture each piece in my head.

I was wondering though.. since this story caught my attention, can I turn it into a small comic? I would give you full credit and It would be only for non-profit usages ' w '

If you've ever seen Yugioh the Abridged Series, this is so much in the tone: pointing out the conflicts of canon and continuity not in some whinny essay but in an extremely humorous light. The best aspect of the humor is that you never fall into slap stick. It just wouldn't fit for this sort of parody. You maintain an extremely serious undertone will pretty much ripping the Metroid franchise (and a number of authors on this very web-site) a new one. Samus, Ridley, and the others glide through this with questioning anything too heavily, which just adds to the comedy.

Great work.

I think this should be required reading for all starting Metroid fanfic writers. XD

I haven't read that many Metroid fanfics, or played that many of the games, but you addressed pretty much every irksome issue that I've seen or could imagine seeing. Trashy shower scene, conflicting personalities, the magical reappearing Ridley...Random, ambling brilliance!

I try to step away from the norm when writing fanfics; I do a Pikmin/Metroid crossover. That's something you don't see everyday. ...Right?

Well then . . . I'll do my best not to bore you. You seem like a very to-the-point kind of person. I like that.

I never really got into Metroid. Its odd, really, seeing as how it met every requirement to entertain me. Sci-fi, aliens, explosions, and boobs. Halo could have done a little better in that last department. And by better, I of course mean less holograms. But I digress.

This is an excellent piece. It is not only humorous, but it serves to illustrate a point that I feel many fandoms suffer from. Its too bad there aren't more sensible folk like you around.

Excelsior! Bravo.

HAHAH! I like what you said in your author's note.

Hilarious. I liked it.

It probably adressed every single controdiction with-in canon or "fanon". I especialy like the RidleyXSamus joke. Very funny, and random.