Beautifully written the flipping between narratives was perfect and I love how you portrayed two of my fav side characters. Kudos to you!

weph i thought u were gonna kill raidou for a second there

It's always nice to read such detailed and thought-out backstories for the side-side characters. This was written spectacularly well; I loved how you switched back and forth between the narratives.

There were a couple lines that caught my attention in particular, like the bit about blood and sex being serious, and the brief conversation between the missing nin and Raidou ("Don't take your mask off, ANBU-boy. Take it off, and there's only one monster left here."), and, of course, the ending dialogue between genma and raidou.

Well done. Thanks for sharing!

great fic! :)

This is AMAZING. Actually, I have yet to read a fic of yours that isn't spectacular. You have real talent, you know. And I'm extremely glad that you use said talent to write about some of my favorite characters.

nice and deep

Great job. The way you changed the scenes was very good.

It flowed really well, and you could feel the emotion, and like many great stories there were parts that made me say 'I really like the way that was written.'

/Only two people in the village who’d do that, and Genma never really carried through with his teasing./

Should it say "There were only two people..."?

/The whispering leaves still at last, leaving the forest far too quiet for Raidou’s comfort./

Should be "The whispering leaves were still at last," I think.

/Mist Village hunter-nin couldn’t kill this man/

'The' Mist Village hunter-nin?

/“You gonna take Midoriko up on it?” Genma asked, sliding off the bed and padding towards the little refrigerator with all the purposeful grace of a hunting cat. “When you get back.”/

I think there should be a question mark at the end of that.

/“Figured I lived dangerous enough anyway.”/

Dangerously.

/this is a scent as familiar almost as the metallic tang of blood, but far more welcome./

Lose the almost? Or move it before familiar and lose the as.

Wonderful story. I loved the transitions, and how fluidly you moved from past to present. *adds to c2*

wow! I love this story! _ It's soo good! Just like all your others!

Awesome fic as always. Quite a good speculation of where Raidou got his scar on the face. The characterization of Raidou and Genma were perfect.

I agree with Wedge: we need more fic like yours on the net.

holy shit that was mad scary

Awesome. So awesome. They should have two categories in Naruto to distinguish between fics like yours("People who can write") and fics like most of the authors on his site ("Rabid Yaoi Fangirls")so fans don't have to wade through two tons of fangirls' mastubatory fantasies about Sasuke and Naruto making out just to get to the decent stuff. I appreciate what authors like you do- provide real entertainment.

Oh my gosh, Ki, this was just beautiful. I just...I do not have words o.o; I adored the characterizations! You really got into Genma and Raidou's heads especially, and Midoriko was lovely as well. I just...oh gosh, I can't even be coherent ;_;

I loved the format of this fic. Just *loved* it. Getting the flashback background mixed in with the events of the battle...it was the *perfect* way to write this fic. Seriously. I adored it.

And the Raidou and Genma interaction was just beautiful. And I *loved* Raidou's train of thought and all his determination through everything that was going on. Your whole writing style was just gorgeous. And good gosh, you can write an awesome battle scene. It was so easy to follow and picture, and so detailed.

Basically, I am in awe. This fic was *wonderful* and I adored it. *faves!*

interesting, poor Raidou, pain makes for a good read though