OH THAT'S WHY I HATED VOLTARIE WHY CAN'T HE JUST
LEAVE KAI ALONE!

NAME:DARK YIN

HAIR:BLACK AND WHITE

SKIN:LIGHT TAN SKIN

OH MY GOD! RAY GOT SHOT! oh yeah when you make another story put my ocs in it let me give you their names,their and the bayblades and bio in the next chapter.

Ok... I just read this whole thing... And now I have no frickin' clue where to start. These last few chapters just made me cry. They were so emotionally gripping. The whole thing was just so friggin' fantastic. (please excuse my use of language, but I'm having a REALLY hard time expressing this. And i'm sorry, but this may be a long review ) And as for Suki and Stephania... Wow. I don't usually like characters being added to anything, ya know? But I have to admit that I absolutely love those two! Ah geez.. I'm sobbing now, thanks a lot! But nopt only was the story amazing, but just those side notes you put in the top and bottom of the chapters... whoa. Most people put really pointless stuff in there, but you. Wow. Has anyone ever told you, you're inspiring? Because I think you are! Ah man, when I get my bearings back, i'm going to have to go back and review on every chapter 'cause I'm a mess right now! This whole story just keeps sucking you in! I started it yesterday, and was thinking about it all day before I could back on and finish it! Ah geez, still kinda sobbing here... I'm not sure what else to say right now, other than I have so much respect for you, and I don't even know you! ( not in a harsh way, but, ya know...) wow... I will definetly reread this SO many times! :) Once again, if I haven't already said this. You're AMAZING! ( and the story too of course! but WOW.) Just the idea of the story itself! .. ok! I'll have to continue this later because I feel like i'm spamming you :/ (sorry) but ohmygod I LOVE IT!

I thoroughly enjoyed this fic! First off, hats to you for making me enjoy it! During some places I was worried that Steph was a tad marysueish in places, especially with your slight controversial statements sometimes. First Steph wasn't that interested in the sport, next she's so good she can beat Tyson 3 times in a practice match and help win the tournament, and then suddenly she thinks she's not very good at it.

Yeah, I wondered about that.

Loved how in character everyone one was a lot of the time. Note I say a lot of the time, as just occasionally, I felt that there was something that I didn't think that character would say. Tyson and Max are the main victims for this. Max didn't get a lot of screentime in this fic anyway really, and I would have liked to see more of him, but whenever you brought him into the spotlight, a character would usually comment how he wasn't being his usual self. You could have put some stuff of where he is fairly normal and chirpy in, but it's okay as it is. Tyson is more around personal predference, except with the stuff in the first chapter where he argued with Kai. Yeah, bit OOC.

Next, pacing in the story and description...all round great, though you could work on setting the scene a bit more. You hardly said anything describing the scenery. Saying the hospital or the Abbey brings up an image, but it would've been nice to see how you imagined them to be. The change in scene sometimes got me too, as you didn't really make it clear when exactly you were moving onto someone else and their situation and I had to think for a few moments to get my bearings.

The plot is where you were strong though. There was an amazingly awesome amount of detail and thought into the story, and I'm really awed by how you made use of everything! Even managing to make stuff which I thought were a bit of a marysueish trait into a plot point. (In this case Steph's phoenix) Nice work!

All in all I give it...8/10. I'll probably be looking at that other Beyblade story of yours soon ;)

:O You really got the intensity in the last scene down well. I thought it was kinda OOC for Tyson to accuse Kai of all that stuff, cause I didn't really think he was one for grudges or jealously. Other than that I really enjoyed it! I'm definitely reading more of this.

I know you finished this in like '07, but I just HAD to comment on it!

...

Wow...

...

That's all I've got to say...I haven't read anything like this since starbugkenney's Crossing the Bridge that she finished back in what... '05?

Wow...

This fic was amazing...I couldn't take my eyes off the computer screen till I finished it...I do feel bad that Stephania had to die...That sucks...but at least Ray's still alive!

Great job!

Definitely a fave!

Ja Ne

this story was amazing, it was really good. the ending made me feel sad but a bit happy as well. Good work! (formally known as Kai Hiwatari1)

memo:must kill voltaire

voltaire:ah

me:yes scream but no one will hear u

voltaire:your insane

me:look who;s talking you syhchotic bastad

voltaire:fuck u

me:NO FUCK YOU

okay some advice run while u still can

omfg! this has to be the best story ever! 12872987529/10 .. o_0

*adds to faves* -

best story ever! and im so glad that some body finaly put boris is dead in their story!

that is so sad. sorry for the late review. i was at camp. i loved loved loved it. can't wait for anothor story.

That was a brilliant ending to an even more brilliant story! I can't believe that after so long its finally finished. I mean, this must have been one of the first FF stories I ever read. That's quite weird that its over now:( I hope you'll have some new work out so I can move onto something else of yours since I'm sure it'll be awesome if its anything like The Power of a Phoenix!

jellybean-kitty

p.s I'll fill in that survey and pm it too you:P

Ah, it's been a while since I've read this story. I guess I've just been lazy; very interesting chapter. Things are definitely getting quite dramatic and angsty...

I see I've missed quite a lot; well, I better get started, ne? Wonderful story you have by the way.

This was a gread ending for a happy beginning. Thank you for writing and finishing this great story

wow - is basically all i can say!

loved it from start to finish