CUTE!

holis!como estas?esta buenisimo el fic!te felicito!la verdad nunca se me hubiese ocurrido esta pareja!fue re original!me encanto!.y me parecen bien que escribas de amor entre mujeres porque por mas que a mi me gusten los hombres,tanto pene cansa! asi que escribis re bien!te deseo suerte,besos y cuidate...chauchis...kare*

Loved reading this story. I swear I know what Rei is going through. Hope to you can update it soon.

This was really amazing. The plot was so believable, and I could actually feel the pain Rei had for Usagi.

"Something I figured out in the later years was that Mars loves her even more than me, Rei and Neo-Queen Serenitys passion for her was more burning that the one Usagi have for Rei..."

These words summed up the entire one-shot, full of pain, pleasure, torture and touch. Thanks for giving me this little piece of sadness to feed off of. Well, I better start on the next chapter of Lonely Miracle. Ja ne.

It was good. I liked it

-MT Night

Angsty Rei/Usagi rules and I must say that I really liked this story, the plot was well formed. The song too, fits them well. However, I found, while reading it, that there were rather a lot of grammatical errors.

For example

"And I leave that day, to forget... but tell me how do you forget a girl like her?, a girl that haunt you at night and visit you at day.

Should be

"I left that day, to forget...but tell me how do you forget a girl like her? A girl that haunts you at night and visits you during the day.

Its mostly just mistakes with tenses. I would suggest running it through a spellchecker, if you have one. Otherwise, you could get a beta reader to correct them if you want to mail it to me or something, I'd be willing to do it.

I must admit, I am pickier when it comes to grammer than a majority of people. Sorry if this review sounds harsh, it isn't meant to be, just constructive criticism really.

You rock! This story was great and I really enjoyed how you made it seem that Rei was almost tortured by her feelings for Usagi.

ah that such a cute story kinda sad too but i liked it. -

Aw... . how cute...

great story

poor rei

grammar was a little off, but it was all understandable

Cute fic. If you can, make the lyrics a bit more distinct in the text, not that they're not distinguishable, but it makes it a bit easier for some readers to follow when in your story it's not separated by a flashback or something.

Do try to get someone else to read your work to proofread grammatical errors you don't catch. For the most part, they can be understood, but it can still be cleaned up just a little. :)

hey,

good story,

was a little hard to keep up with in some places but I enjoyed it. you have managed to make an old idea into something that doesn't seem like every other fanfic n the site.

Good Job.

Try and work on your spelling and grammar a little more or ask someone else to do it for you, although the story is wonderful it can be a little hard to understand in some places. But I loved it anyway.

Congrats on a great story.

Hugs

Heaven Sent Angel

P.S. Shameless self promoting, check out my fics

I love your story it was great. Keep up the great work. You are a great author.

You did a good job with this. I know I liked it, but I'm a sucker for Rei/Usagi stories whether they have a happy ending or sad ending. All stories don't have to have happy endings. I liked how you did end it, with Chibi-Usa reading the diaries.

I will suggest one thing that I suggested to another writer of a songfic; do something to differentiate between the lyrics and the actual story. I find that italicizing the song lyrics work well. I'm not sure if this was a typo or not but its Tokyo not 'Tokio'. The final thing I have to say is watch out for little mistakes. For example, you wrote 'Everytime I wanted to forget her I just leaved without a reason and everytime I thought I have forgot her...' It would make more for sense to be, 'Every time I wanted to forget her I just left without a reason and every time I thought I'd forgotten her...' I hope all of that was helpful :)

Overall though a good story, one that I enjoyed reading and I hope to read more in the future :)