Oh...my... god... I really truly honestly Can't beleive I ever thought any of this drivil was worthy of putting upon the site *hides face* Please please please don't ever read this crap, it makes me feel like CRYING!

this is such an underrated story - it should have thousands of reviews! Plz keep writing

Your story is an okay start but there is room for improvement.

I would give your story a title. When I see a story tittle Untitled it makes me not want to read it because usually they are bad stories. I was bored when I clicked on yours. Titles are hard to think of so the one that you put on for now could be a working on. But any title is better than untitled.

Thank you for following paragragh rules. A lot of people don't and there stories are hard to read.

I would get the focus of the story away from Katie a bit. She has sorta become a Mary-sue. It is a mistake that a lot of people make but you should try and focus the story more on cannon characters. It is hard, I have writeen a few Mary-Sues that i am kinda embarrassed of but learn from your mistakes.

Author's notes should also be kept at the begining or end of a chapter. It is kinda annoying when they are in the thick of things. Keep working on it and revise it as many times as you feel you need to. I can see you writing really good stories after a bit of practice.