Ha! Love how Professor Whams called Hermione by the Harry x Hermione ship name.

just what the hell.

Would read more but I hate Harry/Hermione stories if you read the books and understand what you are reading you'll see she is in fact the fan girl...like this first time he meets her she said I read all about you and named 3 or 4 books second when Ron insult her that makes her hide in the bathroom before that she is always following Harry ( don't say will they have classes together ) there are more then one way to get to a class you'll see if you read the books Name one that ng Ginny has done to be called a fan girl I can't the Valentine's poem nope Fred and George wrote that Ginny is leaving a class Harry is waiting to go in that class room but Fred and George are waiting outside the classroom why they are not in Harry's or Ginny's year so why are they there to see how thier joke is going to play out so see Ginny is the right one for Harry not the fan girl Hermione

this story is nutters

Okay, gotta say that Gates is a cocky bastard, but I found him hilarious lol. I feel like Ron’s evil subconscious has something to do with Harry’s attack. Anyway, loved Snape as voice of reason in Harry’s head lol

Why did you have to burn the album?! Other than that, great story!

this is a well written story but it drags tremendously. how many chapters does it take to prove that Gates is a creepy a$$hole? where's the plot? i usually love lengthy stories but this one is only long because its repetitive not for actual substance. so i quit here. started

Ah yes, did I talk about the plot? Yes, I, essentially did. But, like the sensible reader before me, TimeLoopedPowerGamer, I would say that your plot is quite bland, your characters are rather out of character and flat, and that your story seems to be directionless.

I decided to log in just to properly review this. This is poorly written. It is very, very poorly written. It is absurdly, poorly written. Your grammar and spelling is fine, but the story itself is poor. The whole part with Gates and the letter and Sirius's reasoning is absurd. Not only is it absurd, but none of it fits with Sirius's character, which uou have made no changes to. There is one part that is truly annoying. Sirius states that if he had died, then Voldemort is far stronger than they anticipated. There are a multitude of things wrong with that, an endless deluge. How does Sirius tie in with Voldemort's power at all? He does not influence it. His life does not serve as a measure for it. It essentially says that just because he died, Voldemort is more powerful than they thought. It makes him more important than he is with no reason, asides from the absurdity of it all. Then, there's the fact that he was killed by Bellatrix rather than Voldemort, further emphasizing the absurdity of his letter. Next, he seems to know about Gates and his instability, and yet he stills pulls this. He pretty much knowingly endangers Harry, inadvertent as it is. Then, he restricts Harry's freedom, something that he'd never do, especially considering the fact that you seem to have kept his canon personality. There is only so far that suspension of disbelief will stretch and cover for you. Then, there's the reasoning behind his favors for Gates. Gates himself, seems to state that Sirius did him an insignificant favor. That, would never cover what Sirius has asked of him. There's no way you could spin this in order to make it seem even remotely reasonable. According to the seemingly unchanged rules of magic and debts, you can only ask a favor equivalent to the debt that is held. The favor Sirius has asked has eclipsed the debt many, many times over. You didn't even give the reason for the debt, further increasing the absurdity of it all. Then, then there is the fiasco with "Dr. Perry". Never would any institution hire one as him, and should it, it'd have been shut down. The world seems to function with reality as a basis, and in reality, there are things called government regulations. Perry would never have passed the checks of morality and ethics. Your story, for it would be an insult to all fanfiction to call it such, is poorly written, with its only upside being it's relative length. Your work is shoddy, and I can not, in good mind and with good intentions, recommend the reading of this by anyone wishing to read fanfiction of good quality.

This is poorly written. It is very, very poorly written. It is absurdly, poorly written. Your grammar and spelling is fine, but the story itself is poor. The whole part with Gates and the letter and Sirius's reasoning is absurd. Not only is it absurd, but none of it fits with Sirius's character, which uou have made no changes to. There is one part that is truly annoying. Sirius states that if he had died, then Voldemort is far stronger than they anticipated. There are a multitude of things wrong with that, an endless deluge. How does Sirius tie in with Voldemort's power at all? He does not influence it. His life does not serve as a measure for it. It essentially says that just because he died, Voldemort is more powerful than they thought. It makes him more important than he is with no reason, asides from the absurdity of it all. Then, there's the fact that he was killed by Bellatrix rather than Voldemort, further emphasizing the absurdity of his letter. Next, he seems to know about Gates and his instability, and yet he stills pulls this. He pretty much knowingly endangers Harry, inadvertent as it is. Then, he restricts Harry's freedom, something that he'd never do, especially considering the fact that you seem to have kept his canon personality. There is only so far that suspension of disbelief will stretch and cover for you. Then, there's the reasoning behind his favors for Gates. Gates himself, seems to state that Sirius did him an insignificant favor. That, would never cover what Sirius has asked of him. There's no way you could spin this in order to make it seem even remotely reasonable. According to the seemingly unchanged rules of magic and debts, you can only ask a favor equivalent to the debt that is held. The favor Sirius has asked has eclipsed the debt many, many times over. You didn't even give the reason for the debt, further increasing the absurdity of it all. Then, then there is the fiasco with "Dr. Perry". Never would any institution hire one as him, and should it, it'd have been shut down. The world seems to function with reality as a basis, and in reality, there are things called government regulations. Perry would never have passed the checks of morality and ethics. Your story, for it would be an insult to all fanfiction to call it such, is poorly written, with its only upside being it's relative length

Excellent story! Glad there is a sequel to tie up loose ends. I had a moment of panic when Harry was in the infirmary discussing the extent of Hermione's wounds. Would she accept him back?

What a depressing read...

I dont understand the psychiatrist thing. Why doesnt Harry just not speak at all? That man is annoying the fuck out of me.

This is one of the most puzzling fanfics I've read in a while. The plot is complete blah in my opinion - a crazy doctor with a portable electroshock machine and a magically bound dark wizard bodyguard, really? Thankfully the writing quality, at least spelling and grammar-wise, is okay, but the tone and pacing stumbles around like a drunken man.

Is this story dark, sad, farsical? Are these hijinks or tragedies? I can't tell from the prose as presented.

I also haven't figured out where this is going, why Harry is flopping around without purpose or a logical thought in his head, or even what would make me want to hit the next chapter button. Everyone seems like a dead puppet, dancing to a chapter plot outline, without a soul or any real emotion.

Someone on reddit seemed into the story, which is why I gave it a shot. Maybe it gets better. Maybe it just isn't for me. But those were my thoughts, after making it this far.

MAN I hate Gates, biggest prick ever! and I have a feeling that Prof Whams is the death eater! you're story is awesome! the devastation the conjured Grendel brought than the chaos that ensued afterward, truly a scene out of an epic movie, I wish this were a movie :P