love it please write more

LOVED IT!

Everything seems a bit rushed here- only in the 6th chapter and one of the marauders have already found out who Harry really is. Not only that, but their reaction to this seems so... tame? Like they are super calm about the son of their best friend coming into the future trying to prevent something "life or death". Again, only chapter 7 and there have already been 2 death eater (or well I think the first one too. It wasn't explained who threw the killing curse at Lily anyway) and Harry has already fainted/collapsed twice. These attacks also just seem so... random. Like you don't even expand on maybe why these attacks happened- or the details or anything. Shouldn't this stuff be the gossip of the school? We all know Hogwarts is full of that. A hoard of Dementors attacking the warded and 'safe' Hogwarts (along with apparently death eaters, although that is unclear) and people using unforgivables (almost killing a student) are just glossed over. This isn't normal during this time period, yet no one seems to care. How did Dumbledore save Harry? How was the attack of Hogwarts possible? Why is no one reacting to this? Is no one shocked, scared? I haven't seen the characters really act scared or shocked at all. I mean, in the dialogue they say they apparently are, but actions speak louder then words.

The characters are- well- they aren't exactly OOC. It's more just... they aren't really acting like a real character. One thing I really enjoy about time-travel fics is how people portray their own takes on what the Marauders, Lily, Snape etc. acted like when they were younger. Here, they seem to have the basics (Marauders are pranksters, Lily is good at charms, James is good at transfiguration, Lupin is more bookish, James and Lily don't get along and Peter hides behind other who are more powerful then him because he's a coward yada, yada) but what else? James isn't just a 'prankster', 'bigheaded' and 'likes Lily'. He is lacking a true personality. Like- they make comments about these things every now and then, but they don't actually act out those traits. Also, add onto those personalities! They are super 2D with those few facts standing alone. You aren't bringing anything new other then just regurgitating facts about them from the books occasionally in dialogue. What about their flaws to? Other then James, everyone is just 'perfect' and lack depth. James doesn't even act on his arrogance a lot of times! (Or at least so far)

I guess I won't really find out if any of these things are fixed/expanded upon. I'm not going to keep reading this. It has a lot of potential, the plot seems really good, and you are a decent writer. But, this story is just too fast for me I guess. Everyone else really likes this, so it might just be me over thinking things. Sorry if this sounds mean (please don't misunderstand my tone, this was meant to be more confused/constructive response.) maybe I'll pick it up again in a bit. Thanks for writing this anyway, even though I'm not a huge fan it was entertaining enough. I wasn't bored or cringing or anything like that. 3

So the younger Voldemort is gonna try to hurt James, Sirius, Remus and Lily ahead of time? How would Harry's scar still hurt in the past?

I wonder how long it will be before the rest of the marauders find out who Harry really is?

This is sad. And Harry's thoughts and feelings are understandable.

I really love this . Hope to read more fanfic like this .

I love this although the last part with the ocs was confusing.

what's with all the 8s?

okay, I'd stop right here for a sec. Harry was so Off-Character at the end of this chapter. No offense, but he "sounded" like a girl with all the "I hate you". It's normal for James and Sirius to be this curious since in their time, you don't know who to trust, but then, Harry, as we all know, is hot-tempered and it was too quick for him to shout like that. I imagined Harry to snap at James and Sirius but not shout unless they're being offensive. Asking him if he's a death eater is not that offensive, for me maybe. Plus, Harry should have not expected them to trust him immediately.

Why was there so many 8?

This is an amazing story

Why are there so many errors all of a sudden?

What's with all the 8's?

I'm typing the review for the entire story here. Just wanted to say that this story was very well written. Sirius is my favourite character and I loved seeing him safe. I love the ending, especially!