I felt it started of a little fast and could have used some time to develop instead of just going straight into them confessing how much they like each other.

And Lewa/Kopaka... I've never seen this pairing before... not sure if I like it or not... Think I prefer Lewa/Onua and Tahu/Kopaka better. (that's just me though)

Also, a few parts were a bit confusing and could have been explained better...

But it was a good story, it's just the pairing that's got me a little on the edge of like and dislike...

the ice Toa sighed. “. . .Lewa’s . . .gone . . .” he answered sadly.

“G . . .gone? But . . .No!” Onua stood from his mattress. “He can’t be gone! Those monsters can’t . . .” he sank to his knees as tears began to spill from his eyes.

i'm no author but i would find it hilarous if it went like this(i saw one like this in my friends ff story)

K—Kopaka?. . .W—what’s going on? Where’s Lewa?” Onua questioned weakly from his bed.

“They didn’t tell you?” Kopaka asked.

“No . . .” Onua was worried now.

“. . .” the ice Toa sighed. “. . .Lewa’s . . .gone . . .” he answered sadly.

h-h'e's d-ddead! NO!

(kopaka wacks onua)

"No stupid he was je\ust kidnapped!"

"Oh"

:D

but your way is better

"I’m on spring break for two whole weeks! Wait. Only two? Urgh! Stupid school! It use to be a whole month! Stupid new principle!"

a whole month! uhh, lucky! we;ve always had 2 weeks!

i believe in all 3 of them and gali would go with tahu or lewa please write something soon please

I just had to come back for more slash, even though I've long become disillusioned with the increasingly cliche Bionicle franchise. Bionicle was the first yaoi I've ever read (it was yours of course) so I just *had* to come back. And plus, I can be sure that when I read your stuff, I get quality slash. Ah, slash... wonderful slash... truly, you must write more...

Yay, more Bionicle-yaoi-ness! You're a rather good authoress, I must say.

That was a fairly random pairing, I think I like this one best out of any of them. (*looking through your stuff* "Hmm, Onua/Lewa, that could work, yeah. Tahu and Kopaka? Hot, if a little out of character, but hotness is good enough for me. Lewa and Kopaka. Say what?")

But you managed to make it something really special, my favorite of them all. It's romantic and sweet, and a bit humorous at times. Stylistically everything works, though there's a few parts where the mood or POV could've been better. But that's to be expected.

But other than those few moments I really liked it a lot.

And just a random thing, couldn't Kopaka just stop that blizzard with a wave of his hand? Or is it in the Kal saga, and he therefore doesn't have any powers? In that case, it would've been nice to make mention of it.

Yep. Nice job!

...

...*Review already!* Fine. [squeals] It's so cute! I love it very much. I love your other stories but this be one o' ma favorites. Good job Green writer.

I NEED TAHU/KOPAKA (kopaka is the uke of course)

DO IT OR THE TOA OF THUNDER SHAT ATTACK!

LOLRL! that was so funny! i luv bionicle fics, specially, for some unknown reason, slashy ones! i cant write slash, i feel wrong doing it, but i like to read it. other people are such good slash writers. i suk. oh well. let me know if ya have a sequal!

I don't like the gayness part. but before you throw your computer out the window-i like the plot. I like the action.

Hey! You cut it off! Meanie. I'm not that big a fan of slash fics, but this one ain't too bad. mind you, that's one messed up family - they've all got crushes on one another! But hey, still a good piece. Keep writing.

Augh... I KNEW IT! It WAS you, GD! *grumbles* More yaoi... Anyway, pretty nice, even theough I ain't into that kind of junk. Oh yeah, I checked out your other fics and I couldn't stop luaghing at The Three Mexicans' stuff. Good job!

Weird. Alright which do you belive in

1. kopaka lewa

2. kopaka tahu

3. lewa onua

and who does Gali go with?

i barley read chapter 1 and have no intenions on reading on i guess i have a huge grudge against gayness

My list of idiots:

TakanCD

Jim ( V.R. boy)

Nightbug08

Great story, BTW.