Was really well done I like the way you made Crocea mors look like Excalibur from Fate

I think this story was amazing and for your first lemon fic it was really good

this is great compared to most lemons out there, it doesnt feel like its written as a lemon at all actually. the way you set the story and the pace it took that leads to the lemon scene is well done, even the actual part is incredible, tbh it doesnt feel like your first time writing one at all

I dont usually read lemons because they are done poorly. but this was written really beautifully. you set the scene well, werent over the top and made the entire moment not only erotic, but romantic and beautiful. I think you did very well. I'm sucker for fun reactions so I would love to see what would happen after they returned to their teams but this is fine without anything else at the same time. well done and thank you for the lovely short story

That was good you must continue this. Imagine the two hidding there relationship for the time while secretly doing it almost getting court. Imaging if winter found out.

For a first time Lemon writer this was really good, there were a few very minor errors that didn't at all detract from the story. I can't wait to see other lemon stories from you, maybe an anthology series of Jaune with other ladies throughout the show.

really like this chapter sad there wont be full story would really like to read a full rwby fanfic from you .also looking forward to reading the next one with yellow

Niiiiiiice.

Wow that was intense. Loved it

Don't know how you can call this shit man. This is pretty good stuff here. I can get into White Knight with more stuff like this.

this some serious gourmet stuff

Dude. This way better than some of the hardcore lemons I've read. Has a lot more feels. Great job

This is anything but shit this is beautiful

This is great! Nice work!

This was really good