a very good storie, the fight scene was awesome but maybe i need to read more Madoka to understanted Mami way of thinking. can i ask your opinión on a idea the i have?

Let's be real, Nanoha would have finished this fight in 10 seconds. Didn't you watch the movies? she got put through a massive stone pillar at high speed, and came out pretty much without a scratch, and you are telling me she got hurt from a kick from Mami? You need to do more research. Nanoha didn't even use her flash move, barrier or protection? I like Mami and all, but you know it's wank if you have to make an excuse for it.

Mami is the perfect one to have in a crossover fight. Her abilities are versatile in a way that the others aren't and it allows her to compete with a character like Nanoha. Sayaka would get her shit stomped in, Kyouko would retreat if she felt she was losing and Homura would stop time, put a bullet in Nanoha's head and go on her way without feeling much remorse. And of course Madoka would have just engaged her in a conversation to begin with and never fought.

And that was a very good fight, if I do say so myself. Nice work.

If you ever write a sequel to this, I’d like to see Madoka and Sayaka become MGLN-type magical girls instead of Puella Magi, other kinds of MGs besides mages and Puella Magi, and/or Kyubey being exposed as a fraud.
Just a few suggestions.