You make me tear up and grin at the same time, well done. Loved this story!

You can't beat Enty's luck

Eeeeh, these things always seem to ask you to ignore massive sections of the canon to justify the story. I cannot understand how a precaution could be taken. If the shipgirls beat the sirens and the sirens completely curbstomped all of humanity than how can they stop something that has demonstrated to be stronger than something that beat them?

That was cute. It does raise the question of what happened at Operation Crossroads

This is very well written, but certainly not perfect.

The first half of the story before the meeting with Yorktown was the strongest. You made me wonder about why Enterprise was staying in such squalid conditions, why she was ball-and-chained, who were left in the post-war, how they were doing, what's going to happen to Enterprise, and etc. Through this, you set up an incredible somber mood, mystery, and a lot of intrigue.

Unfortunately, all of that is spoiled when Yorktown is introduced. Yeah, she talks about some serious subjects like meeting the shipgirls that killed her and the ones that she herself has killed, but she basically reveals that a shipgirl afterlife exists and that's what really takes away from what you set up earlier. The mystery and intrigue are gone. And early in their conversation, Enterprise reveals that she's afraid and doesn't want to die but there's no reason set up to establish why this should still be true after talking with Yorktown. Enterprise wants to see her sisters and friends again. Well, happy days, an afterlife exists and doesn't seem to be the suffering for eternity kind. No reason not to die. That somber note established in the beginning is gone because of this. It's actually quite uplifting and probably not the mood you were going for.

At the end of the day, still a really well written story. Really, my biggest issue with this story is that it wasn't as downer of a story as I thought it to be. You original idea sounds intriguing though. Having Enterprise converse with someone that's not a ghost that reveals the existence of an afterlife could fix some of the problems listed. Maybe you can write that story next? Whatever the case may be, this was a really good first fanfiction and I hope there's more to come.

It’s really good. And I think it would be awesome if you wrote a sequel.

God you can write an excellent story, & I hate that. I nearly cried like a baby when reading this. Though I do want to see a part 2.

minor thing but please watch the honorifics like nee-chan, nee-san. They both mean older sister. you can't have two sisters refer to each other as nee-chan. It's small details that ruins the "authenticity" if you know what I mean.

Ow. That hurt. I love that this fandom is starting to make more stories like this. For a first fic, this wasn’t bad at all.

Great fic dude can't wait to read more. I had kinda a similar idea but from prinz eugens point of view to here thoughts on being given to the U.S and and operation crossroads as all ships there help comfort eachother in their final hours before bombs fall.