| Reviews for Of 2 Worlds |
|---|
   Im New Plz review chapter 1 . 7/18 Why *bad noise* why do U keep on starting new stories and forget about the others! |
| InsertRandomUncreativeNameHere chapter 7 . 7/15 Just some general critiques, don't take it personally. 1) Repetitiveness. Especially in the beginning of the fourth to last paragraph, you used the word 'suddenly' several times. Try to mix it up a little, it makes it mor interesting to the reader. 2) Expressiveness. Your writing and grammar is good, but try to makeit more expressive, the exclamation points exist for a reason! Also, less importantly, don't stick completely to perfect grammar when someone speaks, try to follow how you would say it out loud without preplanning it. 3) Chunky paragraphs. Try to spread out the paragraphs, this isn't an essay for school, and try splitting people talking into their own paragraph for their words and descriptions of how they said it. Sorry if that one's a little confusing lol. Basically " 'Why hello,' he growled, 'quite the surprise to see you here.' " should be its own paragraph. Overall, it was really good and I look forward to the next update! |
| M.Queen chapter 7 . 7/15 Percy é impressionante |
| Owen chapter 1 . 7/12 Um, what!? Why’s Voldemort being nice? He would’ve killed Percy and Sally without a second thought since he’s a major racist and would hate that Sally married someone who wasn’t a pure blood and because Percy isn’t a full wizard. I mean when has he ever shown even a shred of kindness?! |
| Ranger Wheatley chapter 4 . 7/10 So Nero is here? Man, it feels like the only thing the Fates do these days are mess with Percy. |
| Ranger Wheatley chapter 2 . 7/10 Wait a minute, Percy's eyes are sea-green. Where did you get gold from? |
| Ranger Wheatley chapter 1 . 7/10 WAIT THEY BROKE UP?! NOOOOOOOOOOO! |
| Mitch chapter 4 . 7/9 Percy’s dad is Poseidon you retard. Also you totally overpowered Percy in this horrific excuse for a story. |
| M.Queen chapter 1 . 7/9 uau |
| InsertRandomUncreativeNameHere chapter 4 . 7/9 Good story, I like the plot. Just a tip, you could try spliting up your paragraphs, you have very long ones that are good in an essay, but if you are writing a story it is sometimes easier to read if you split it up a litle. I like it! |
| goyalaayush890 chapter 4 . 7/9 Pls update more often |
| Doom60 chapter 2 . 5/29 Wtf this is the same as chapter one |
| tiarapk15 chapter 3 . 5/28 Had been a while since i read slytherin percy. Keep up the good work! |
| P34n6t chapter 3 . 5/28 This is a really good story! Not trying to sound mean or anything, but it's helpful for reading when a writer uses the "enter" button when writing some dialog. Other than that, this is a great story and chapter! :D |
| Dartoso chapter 2 . 5/9 its an interesting idea but needs to keep working on it as in why is percy just like sure ill follow and all that |
