Ah, I should probably also criticize you for giving me such a hard time finding certain characters. Try typing in ash and actually figuring out who that is. Annoying.

I rather enjoy this. There is an issue of switching between so many points so rapidly. I would recommend getting everyone together so their story lines are intertwined. Would make it easier to follow.

Okay. Did you insert a bunch of characters into warhammer? You mad man. Fantastic idea.

Ok... Too many diverging points and the flow of this just breaks with how short each section is. . Multiple character perspectives are fine but again the way this story is structured to this point just flies by any coherency as the perspectives jump from point to point with no real rhyme substance or reason. There's a page here and there for each. A lot of what you put in is pure descriptor for characters that are just popping in. The actual meat of any of these that involve character development, thoughts, and story ideas probably constitutes about 2-3 paragraphs of actual content if that by the end of chapter five. Your current structure is

Meet character x

Here's about a paragraph and a half of a description of said character.

Here's 2-6 lines of an event.

Rinse repeat 3 times.

Where is any character thoughts on the new world.

Goals.

Motivation.

Developing interaction.

Conflict (physical or mental)

I'm sorry if you find this insulting but this feels more like an outline and a shotgun blast of material onto the page hoping something sticks. Normally I would offer story criticism/praise but so far there isn't enough "story" in this but rather a summary. None of the characters really mean anything here. If I had to offer some advice I would suggest buckling down and focusing on one character at a time and trying to say something with each chapter for them before scene jumping. I would probably start with Shirou or just focus on him because he seems to be the one you have the most to say about with what you already have.

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Oh and if you need to clarify things about the lore don't be afraid to ask other Warhammer fans, the community is generally very welcoming and loves it when people want to learn about the lore

A more ambitious crossover than infinity war Indeed, the story is great, though there's quite a few discrepancies to the lore, like 4 greater daemons just showing up out of nowhere, or how grom is still alive (I'm assuming this is using the total war Warhammer timeline), the wood elves would have killed anything that trespassed in athel Loren, more so if it burned even a single tree, and summoning the undead would be considered necromancy/vampire magic as opposed to death magic which cannot summon or control the undead this would also make everyone extremely suspicious of ainz or outright try to kill him, the ungors are also all small, a big ungor isn't a thing, it's just a gor at that point, a single grail knight wouldn't be able to fight even a single greater daemons, they might be blessed and near immortal but they are still human, and magic in any form is viewed with suspicion within the Warhammer world, and most people would be suspicious of strangers anyways (pun intended)

Skaven weapons are unreliable, but extremely destructive, being only one of the few races that know how to kill god level beings

Either way, you did say you were knew to the Warhammer world and it's all understandably confusing, i hope this story does keep going as it is quite entertaining, and good luck with mastering the lore.

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I am more interested in our dear hunter

Well written so far, also love the Jojo reference with Grom.

I like to think the non chaos/other evil Warhammer Fantasy gods saints of the Emperor

Remember how much life for medieval peasants sucked to preindustrial cultures (before modern medicine and transportation) nature is a ruthless brutal b-word that whole harmony with nature is a city dweller concept

Commandments of Handrich

Be fair to consumers, employees, and the environment

Be sharp but not dishonest

Only cheat cheaters

Give charitably but within reason

Anakonda Amazons Greater than Slann High Age Weapons

Lizardmen Temple Cities giant space ships
Gator-Chamelean-Dino-Dragon (Rainbowfeathered Serpent/Ryu) Men

Duardin

Truthsayers

Reborn as noble abhumans-Dwarf/Giant
Beast(flora(chimera/kaiju)/golem/robot)folk/ogre/troll/Heroes of the Storm

Orks become Krork- Maestro/Leader/Doc Green/Professor/Green Scar/Sakaarson/Nul “Breaker of Worlds” as well as Hobgoblin/Demogoblyn

Eldar become Asurai organic Amazos/ Warhammer Fantasy Elves

Krork-Maestro/Leader/Professor/Doc Green/Doc Samson/Green Scar/Sakaarson/Nul “Breaker of Worlds” as well as Hobgoblin/Demogoblyn, Eldar become Azurai Magno organic Amazos/Brother Grimm Warhammer Fantasy Elves, halfangel-half devil demoness/Fairy/Pyxie/NegaSpyte/Genie, Gnome, arch/uber/ultragremlin/demiimp-antifairy, replicae (genetic diversity different races and genders) perfect human (captain America/Nick Fury/Cable) clone, enhance (cybernetic brains) completely under thrall Symbioids Justice Titans-Supermartian/Rann/(Skorp Von Warstar)Adam Strage-John Carter/Flash Gordon, Wonderhawk, Aquaorion, Alakazam-Captain Marvel/Shazam/Zatara-Doc Fate(Wyrd)Mandrake, Bat-Lantern, Zauriel, Superdemon, Squad Superman (Earth 14/33/13)

The Empire is never alone unity is their strength they may not always get along but the moment someone outside the Empire wrongs their neighbors they come to the aid of their countrymen) and Karl is not just an amazing warrior and general (who leads from the front and is a skilled and strong enough warrior to do so and keep his tactical and strategic mind which is far more useful the silver seal allows him to go toe to toe with orc warbosses, giants, and chaos champions) he is an equally skilled politician and diplomat the type of man who comes along once a thousand years

The Tzarina doesn't lead from the front using her tactical and strategic mind far more value but she is an extremely powerful and skilled warrior

One of Sigmar's well the cult of Sigmar's commandments is Thou shalt render all reasonable aid unto dwarf-folk from when the king of Dwarfs gave him the Ghal Maraz for saving his life

Delicious Halfling food

Prefer call it Sigmaria or something

Sometimes Karl Franz is the only noble who gives a damn about his subjects sometimes the Empire is fair and just, an enlightened ideal Renaissance-esque with industrial revolution just around the corner if not for Orcs, Chaos and all the rest, well as fair and just as possible in a medieval, feudal system of hereditary aristocracy

Mechanical horse their version of the car

Combine Alluminas and (never fallen/reformed) Obscuras into benevolent Tzeentch
Necoho
Malal

Archer's last act in Heaven's Feel: did he simply give his arm to Shirou in order to give Shirou a fighting chance against the Shadow, being completely unaware of how the arm would slowly kill him, or could he have been aware of what fusing his arm to Shirou would do to him, and thus believed that Shirou killing himself by overusing Archer's Projection could technically count as Archer "killing" Shirou?

salamanders are LIT

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