Whilst a nice start, the flow of the dialogue is poor. Read it aloud as if telling someone else this story, and then place commas and full stops where appropriate. While not totally grammatically incorrect, it lowers the overall quality of the writing.

awesome. please update more

wow. so mountain and tyrion are dead

awesome chapter

wow. great start

So cool!

This is a self insert, done right. The different point of views give life to this story.

In a way it reminds me of 'Wearing Robert's Crown'. If you enjoy this story, give it a try.

This story deserves more reviews and favorites.

Hope to see this story to its end. Please don't leave us hanging.

Wow, just wow. I don't know why there aren't more reviews man maybe it's the word count. This fic takes a place in the top 5 best SI fics I've ever read, everything is to my liking apart from a few punctuation errors. Kudos man.

I never get tired of self-inserts. Its like sunsets, pizza and puppies, even if you've seen them a million times you can't say no to another one.

Oh snap this is goooooooood. I'm loving the strategic alignment of those 3 realms too.

Oh so amazing he was friends with the man ducked the king and pushed a small boy out a tower...ohhhhh wwwwooooooowww such respect they had for each other.

I like this story so far. I hope you will continue.

Tyrion dead ? Why ?!

Oh my !

The Vale to Harrenhall would more logically use EASTERN And Central Riverlands troops as the Golden Tooth is on the Western border and the troops gathered for that fight would be colected on their way West.! Please download a map of Westeros from the web. It is under the general heading of Game of Thrones/ maps. ..the LESSONING of the guards... ...Ser Stafford was ORDERED to... ...at LANNISPORT... ...ROUT they, not route. ...with our HORSE of about 2,000 ... ...5,000 armed men to DESEND... ...I TRIED to reform... ...if I had killed him THEN... ouch.! Painful And embarrassing !