Beautiful truly beautiful

Good.

Cute. I like the way you switch back and forth between their perspectives. There's a few spelling and grammar errors here and there but the emotional uncertainty and youthful excitement really come across.

While the writing quality of your story is good in terms of spelling and grammar, please note this part of the Content Guidelines:

"Please note FanFiction does not accept explicit content, Fiction Rating: MA, and the rating is only presented for reference."

You have to remove all of the detailed descriptions of physical interaction of sexual or violent nature in this story if you want it to remain at this site, or upload it to a site where "Fiction MA" content is allowed such as Archive Of Our Own.

I a d.

Nice work I look forward to more

You know, for something this surprisingly new... You're pretty good. Keep up the good work, bro.

Nice.

It’s really good.
Izuku uses ofa and u have written afo tho

So is he gonna meet Uraraka in the bathroom and possibly join her as well. Both need to freshen up after their activities last night and also “refresh” their energy , if you catch my drift.

Thanks again for another chapter

Also fix this sentence

“She gasps slightly as we connect and I become painfully aware my arousal from my thought s earlier is still with me”

First of obviously the random s I think should be connected with thought, also add in “painfully aware of my arousal” needs the of to know what is Deku aware of and the answer is: of his arousal

Figured out how to post a response review:) Thank you guys for catching my mistakes 3

Is it one-shot or there will be a next chapter? Because this fic deserve more chapter.

This is pretty good and it would be rhythm, keep writing

“Ochaco begins to twitch on my fingers as I slow my rhyme”.

I think it should be rhythm not rhyme.

But other than that I don’t think I could find any other errors that needed to be fixed.

I really enjoyed this story and I can’t wait for more. Heck I can’t wait to see how worried Inko must be.

If you need any help on proofreading your story, send a PM and I can give you a hand