I don't know that to think about this oneshot.

Thank you for the oneshot!

CMY187 I'm amused you actually reviewed all of the lines, if not most of it, like, why the hell do i find it funny

"I could end that sentence in so many ways"
He still finds her fascinating after all this time.
"a perfect composition of long black hair and glistening blue eyes"
He has gotten to know her better, and has seen the flaws and imperfections beneath her facade of perfection. It only made him grow closer to her. Also, I wonder what Mr and Mrs Yukinoshita were like in THEIR youth. Considering that Haruno is even more damaged than Yukino...
"I can't even get away from her eyes"
I wonder how Yukino would describe Hachiman's eyes. I still find it fascinating that Iroha's reaction upon making eye contact with Hachiman for the first time ever was to give a smile that wasn't insincere. Then again, now that I think about it, Iroha is a manipulative (and possibly sociopathic) liar who is often teased and harassed by the other girls in her class. Perhaps Kawasaki is not the only person who found a kindred spirit in Hikigaya Hachiman.
"every simple face that I've previously forgotten without issue"
When Iroha smiled at him for the first time in the Service Club, Hachiman frowned and internally flinched; he immediately realized that she is dangerous. How many boys were fooled into thinking that she may fancy them? While Tobe did everything that Iroha asked of him, Hachiman refuses some of her requests.
"the much renowned romantic comedy Gods"
(looks at GenericOregairuFan, SouBU, Sage-of-Eyes and ZeroXSEED) So who's getting which pantheons?
"I'm a very pedantic person"
Have I mentioned that he's a natural investigator? (looks at The Life Awaiting) That story is going to be terrifying. For me, I'm going to view it as Yukino being the protagonist and Hachiman being a villain or antagonist.
"she'd probably comment at great length"
Yukino is usually curt and formal, coming off as cold, aloof and arrogant. She becomes more talkative and animated when she is around Hachiman.
"Service Club sessions don't usually last longer than that"
There's so much that can be done with the Service Club that not enough fanfics utilize.
"Yukinoshita could probably become a serial killer"
...there's more than one fanfic with this premise. The scary thing is that I find it believable.
"whether the image is hilarious or just outright disturbing"
Light Yagami was a good man who hated injustice and the law not only failing to condemn but even protecting criminals. Receiving the Death Note turned him into a psychopath. Give a person power...(looks at Yukino) ...
"Oh no, I can"
In my opinion, Yukino is one bad day away from becoming a truly horrible person. As it is, she is still a child with hopes, dreams, fears and worries.
"I'm pretty sure even Kirito is ashamed of me"
Which one, SAO-Canon-Kirito or SAO-Abridged-Kirito? Also, I have a pitch for an isekai-into-game-world story; a comedy where everyone is trying to escape because the game is legitimately terrible and BORING ('Lemme outta here!').
"I will just be stabbed"
You might be surprised by how she would react. Also, Hachiman is unfazed by Komachi being in a state of undress in front of him. What are Haruno and Yukino like in that regard?
"I'm going to her apartment"
I imagined a noir-story in which Yukino is a lawyer and Hachiman - with some guilt - breaks into her home to find and examine whatever information she may have that could help him for his own case.
"you'd think I was wearing a bandolier and cradling a semi automatic"
I've been watching too many videos of Red Dead Redemption 2 lately.
"activate dead eye"
Speak of the devil!
"If only"
Careful what you wish for, Hachiman. You practically are already at least 30 percent Max Payne.
"very much trapped in the Edo period"
I wonder what Hayato's family is like. He never talks about them. For all that he is surrounded by people who call themselves his friends, none of them really know anything about Hayato. Yukino and Haruno have known Hayato since early childhood.
"somewhat unfortunate acquaintance"
Anyone with any sense could see that Yukino enjoys interacting with Hachiman.
"my usual study partner"
Yui's friendship with Yukino is so goddamn underrated by the Oregairu fanbase.
"that I in no way harbor any romantic feelings for you whatsoever"
This is like someone immediately denying any involvement in a crime before the police had even started asking them anything.
"an aficionado in the art of voyeurism"
Hachiman honestly could easily tell if a person may or may not be having an extra-marital affair. Put the man and the woman-who-isn't-his-wife in the same room and he'd pick up on it immediately. The guy is dangerous.
"bewilderingly unnecessary vocab choices"
I can tell that you enjoy writing Yukino.
"Or both simultaneously"
I really, really want Yukino to become OBSESSED with D&D. Knowing her, she'd become a DM, write her own campaigns and force people to play them. Que the awkwardness and/or heated arguments thanks to Yukino putting so much thought into her campaigns that it feels like the players really are in an actual crisis with numerous lives on the line. Now I'm imagining Yumiko and Kawasaki having a heated argument in regards to one of them choosing to accept a despicable character as an ally. Iroha then chimes in, 'We can always kill him/her afterward.'
"Yuigahama mentioned, with much confusion"
She knows. Yui is NOT an airhead. She knows that Yukino just wants to spent time alone with Hachiman.
"she'd probably be doing Japan a favor"
Tell that to Sable.
"Where do people even find that kind of anger?"
Good question.
"generally poor reaction to my presence"
Hmph. Their loss.
"every other place I've ever been to"
Hachiman would be more depressed if he were at an event where everyone is polite and accomodating to him.
"intolerable social butterflies like Miura and Haruno"
I don't know if Hachiman is right to call Miura a social butterfly. If anything, Yui is more fitting of that label. Yumiko is quite elitist/tribal in that if you aren't already in her clique, she would most likely be inclined to glare. Many people, be they male or female, would at least try to pretend to be polite. Why does Yumiko have such a temperament? I would love to follow a story in which Hachiman ends up learning more about her than he ever cared to. I really like their dynamic in Broken Glass.
"What's a lone wolf to do"
Winter is Coming. Now I'm imagining Hachiman and Iroha walking side-by-side, only Hachiman is a wolf and Iroha is a fox. Sounds like a Pixar movie.
"sizeable hatred for vapid conversation"
Dammit, now I'm imagining Hachiman owning an office and speaking to an anxious, close-to-tears Japanese businesswoman who is asking him to find her husband who had only been missing for over one day.
"Where would the government raise such funds? Where would they find the appropriate land"
Hachiman isekai'd and becoming involved in governing, warring and/or racketeering.
"I'm not the only lone wolf"
Kawasaki is even more of a loner than he is. She doesn't feel the need to justify or glorify it. She just prefers being on her own. Now I'm imagining her as a policewoman insisting that she doesn't need a partner.
"The bear among wolves"
Mormont to Stark? Dammit, sorry, it's just that Season 8 is only two days away.
"I'm overthrowing the government!"
(looks at Orario) Ha!
"any form of organized resistance to their rule"
Isshiki Iroha would be the person who makes deals with all sides and comes out of the conflict with bundles of money. In other words, she is Italy during the Crusades.
"far more interested in the latest fashion accessory or light novel series"
Exactly. Instead of primarily using fear, you distract them.
"monologuing"
Hachiman as an actor. Dammit, now I want that story.
"wishing that I was literally anywhere else"
The dynamics that Hachiman has with his four love interests; he is awkward when Yui and Yukino move closer to him, and is (generally) more comfortable around Kawasaki and Iroha. All four relationships are similar and yet different; Hachiman would become both better and worse in different ways depending on who he grows closest to. In my opinion, there IS no Best Girl. They are all great characters.
"The trusty Stealth Hikki"
Hachiman is good at flying under the radar. The ones he should be wary of are the people who take notice of and interest in him.
"noticing the person you're trying to overthrow is annoyingly attractive"
Dammoit, GenericOregairuFan, stop making me want to beg you to write your own Oregairu/ASOIAF crossover! By the way, to me, Stannis Baratheon is more similar to Yukinoshita Yukino than any other ASOIAF character. Just read his character page on the ASOIAF TvTropes page. Like Yukino, Stannis isn't charming, but he has another type of charisma.
"I didn't press the buzzer"
If it was someone like, say, Ebina or Yumiko, Hachiman wouldn't be so hesitant. Also, in my opinion he'd be less hesitant if it were Iroha's home he is visiting, though no less cautious.
"If there's any dense shounen heros nearby"
I immediately thought of Aiz Wallenstein.
"I could hear your footsteps on the floor"
I thought of a certain scene in No Country For Old Men.
"When has anything between me and Yukinoshita not been complicated?"
Rivals, not friends, who love each other. Yeah, I still can't stop thinking about a possible dynamic betwen an isekai'd Hachiman and Stannis Baratheon. Seriously, READ STANNIS' TVTROPES CHARACTER PAGE. He IS Yukino.
"Only humans can be counted as guests"
What about cats, Yukino?
"I would never be that cruel intentionally"
(looks up at the line about imagining her holding a Death Note) ...
"A year in the Service Club says otherwise"
Sheesh, people are going to ask if they are dating or married if they maintain that kind of banter.
"my light novel"
Cue a monologue of Hachiman criticizing this new and wildly popular light novel series entitled Love & Coffee, specifically its protagonist Nagatomo Etsuji.
"something as disgraceful as distracting me"
You sound so narcissistic, Hachiman.
"A slightly out of place table?"
Hachiman has a keen eye for details. Kind of reminds me of Adrian Monk. Goddammit, he needs to stop making me see him as a natural investigator. I imagined Hachiman being asked to meet with and question a group of people and within minutes telling his client/requestor who is lying/hiding something and who isn't.
"for that cold, unforgiving reality"
I wonder what it would be like for Hachiman to find himself in the world of a harem-comedy anime and promptly sidestepping all of the pitfalls that a typical dense/stupid male protagonist would have fallen into.
"I'm only about fifty percent distracted in Service Club sessions"
Honestly, it would be awkward for anyone to spend an hour almost every day in close proximity to not one but two people who clearly have romantic feelings for you.
"if I underestimated Yukinoshita's attractiveness"
Nagatomo Etsuji insists that Machiko Mei is not good-looking.
"far more interested in the practicality of clothes than she is in their appearance or fashion credibility"
I wonder how Yumiko casually (or formally) dresses. Also, Yukino clearly feels that no matter how she dresses, Haruno would always be more attractive due to her charisma and charm.
"that Bunny Girl Senpai show"
I read the manga and liked it. I still find Hachiman to be a better protagonist, though. Not going to deny that Sakuta's a great protagonist himself. Sakuta's entertaining, but Hachiman just strikes me as a better character.
"indulging in the let's-give-it-a-stupidly-long-title will largely be awful"
I agree, Hachiman. What kind of dumb name is my Teen Romantic Comedy Is Wrong As Expected anyway?
"how much Mai resembled Yukinoshita"
Okay, who wrote Bunny Girl Senpai in this universe?
"very uncharacteristically feminine"
Why do I suspect that Yukino started buying clothes different to what she usually wears after she met Hachiman?
"instead of black-lace girl"
Elsewhere at that exact moment, Kawasaki feels the urge to strangle Yukino for some reason. Also, GenericOregairuFan, you are a cruel person. But that goes hand-in-hand with great writing anyways.
"she's wearing those adorable reading glasses"
I imagined Kawasaki wearing sunglasses and Iroha, for some reason, wearing military-grade night vision goggles which she probably stole.
"she stuttered painfully. I bit my lip"
This made me smile.
"Just be a gentleman, Hachiman"
Iroha: 'I want to watch this one!'
Hachiman: 'Then I'll watch THIS one.'
"a few more pauses and stops"
Yukino isn't stupid, and neither is Hachiman. They like each other, care about each other, and find each other attractive. They both know what could happen if they are alone together. Yukino knew it when she set up and offered the meeting, and Hachiman knew it when he accepted.
"Zaimokuza-kun"
The 'kun' made me grin. Not even Totsuka gets to be openly acknowledged by Hachiman as his friend. Only one person has that. Which I find curious since Zaimokuza could not possibly be the only otaku in Sobu High. Maybe the reason Hachiman likes him more than the others is because of how earnest, sincere and shameless Zaimokuza is about it. Come to think of it, that's what he likes about Iroha as well.
"a person always has a reason to do or say something"
Dr Hannibal Lecter: 'I was curious what would happen.'
"Upon getting past her front door"
Iroha would have just took Hachiman by the arm and dragged him over the doorway. She does that a few times in Oregairu. Out of the four girls, Iroha is the least shy/averse to physical contact with Hachiman, with Yui coming in second.
"It was made of glass"
I thought of the party in Broken Glass.
"if I allowed myself to be that rude"
I thought of the Oregairu fanfic 'My Psychological Crime Thriller SNAFU'.
"my light novel smirk"
Wait, what?! What even is that?! Hachiman is such a strange person!
"The art of eye contact is an ancient and deadly one"
It's a key component of manipulation and seduction. A fleeting look can be more effective than pressing oneself against the mark. People who are very good deceivers can lie not only with their words and gestures but with their eyes as well.
"not relevant to the task at hand"
And what is the task, Yukino? Because it obviously isn't studying.
"I have no doubt those hardships will persist"
Things may get worse than ever before if the Service Club receives a very serious and troubling request/case, far more than chain-mail, the Cultural Festival or the Student Council Presidency. I'm curious if in the event that something like that happens, if Hachiman would do something that would get him suspended or expelled if he is caught. He already does something illegal in Oregairu; fixing an electronic poll/election.
"if they hadn't asked questions?"
In my opinion, what holds humanity back as a species is the oft-repeated phrase 'Don't ask questions, just do what I/we tell you.'
"the last strands of her sanity"
She wanted to be alone with him. That is the main reason that she arranged this. And in my opinion, Yui knew it as well. Honestly, I don't find it unbelievable that Yui may try or be accepting of entering into a polygamous relationship with her two friends. If so, while it would solve some problems, it would only create others. An Oregairu fanfic which follows this 'route', and takes it seriously rather than gratuitously...that wouldn't be an easy story to write.
"fixated on something beyond my comprehension"
While at an elementary school overseas with Hayato (in the light novel it is in the USA), then later at a middle school in Japan, Yukino was bullied, ostracized, tormented and scorned by most of the other female students, the majority of whom were in the same classes as her. Her upperclassmen harassed her mercilessly as well. Like Hachiman, Yukino was betrayed by peers whom she thought to be her friends. She attributes the bullying to her excellence and appearance, and states that when she defeated her in the tennis match, the look on Yumiko's face reminded Yukino of her past bullies. False rumors of her being a lover of Hayato, who did little to nothing to stop her from being bullied and harassed, caused their childhood friendship to become strained to a point where they now hardly ever speak to each other. In my opinion, Yukino's assessment and conclusions in regards to her past torment is incorrect; her excellence and appearance cannot be the main reason, for Hayato is the same yet was never once ostracized or bullied like she was.
"getting straight to the point"
This is what separates Hachiman from Hayato; Hayato chooses to try to keep things civil and comfortable. Hachiman would rather go past the lofty clouds and dive into the dirt and mud.
"If you want to improve yourself, invite Hayama Hayato"
This isn't about academics, and Hachiman wasn't referring to them when he spoke of her 'improving herself'. He knows that Hayato and Yukino cared for and perhaps also loved each other in the past. And as for Hayato himself, he and Hachiman have a fascinating relationship; like and dislike, respect and contempt, envy and pity. All present and all mutual.
"proud to be from Chiba"
If Hachiman becomes a private investigator or a policeman, he'd be seeing the uglier sides of the prefecture. But as long as it is real rather than fake...
"If you're not willing to say what you want, then I don't see a reason that I should stay"
He will tell Yukino what she needs to hear, rather than what she wants to hear. Honestly, a romance between Hachiman and Yukino would be anything but perfect. I agree with you that he would probably have the most comfortable and stable romance with Kawasaki.
"I always ended up having to manipulate someone"
'It's time to demythologize an era and build a new myth from the gutter to the stars. It's time to embrace bad men and the price they paid to secretly define their time. Here's to them.' - James Ellroy
I wonder what Hachiman and Yukino would think of the Punisher, especially this line spoken by him in the Marvel Knights comic series: 'The world you live in, the one full of words like 'civilization' and 'rehabilitation' and 'fair hearing' and 'law and order'...it's a LIE. It works right up to the point that it doesn't. After that there's me.'
"something I could call comfortable, and unchanging"
In my opinion, Hachiman would be a wonderful lover and husband to whoever romances him, and all four of the girls who love him know it.
"I've never known...how to say these things"
Isshiki Iroha: 'I'm starting to want the real thing too...You'd better take responsibility.'
I'll say it now, GenericOregairuFan: a fanfic centering on a dynamic between Yukino and Iroha, taking place after Iroha's confession to and received rejection from Hayato, would be fantastic. I've noticed that Iroha has yet to make so much as an appearance in any of your stories. I'm curious of how you would write her.
"who you have tried and failed to find the adjectives to describe"
Hachiman can find out so much about a person, but he deliberately blinds himself to the evidence that a woman is genuinely interested in him. He kept trying to tell himself that Iroha is only using him to get to Hayato when it is OBVIOUS that it isn't Hayato she is truly interested in. He also told himself that Yui was only nice and friendly to him out of a sense of obligation. Hachiman lies to himself, just as much as other people do.
"I never answered the ones that I asked"
In Sage-of-Eyes' story, Hachiman is faced with a cruel dilemma; to return home to the people he loves, or stay with the people he loves.
"I've had bad study sessions"
Ha!
"I never stopped contemplating"
This made me smile. Now I want Hachiman to be a relationship counselor.

This was short but sweet. I especially loved the last few paragraphs; Yukinoshita's flustered state is always cute to behold.

Honestly though I'm still reeling from Broken Glass. At this point I can't see Yukino and Hachiman's relationship as anything other than toxic sadomasochism. Especially since I feel like Broken Glass is actually a realistic interpretation of the Oregairu cast, in that if Hayama was actually murdered I could totally see Hachiman forsaking all of his friends and family to reach the truth and him destroying the Service Club in the process.

Oh well, you may have ruined Oregairu for me but it was worth it.

So good. Well written and entertaining dispute not much actually happening. Such a mean cliffhanger but it also just really works well. :)

I like this a lot

nice chapter

Your Hachiman monologues are on point, as usual. Some grammatical errors here and there, but nothing too glaring.

Thank you for this one-shot.

There was nothing generic about this piece. I'm of the firm belief that anything related to Hachiman should begin with a monologue and you nailed it.

Funny and pretty good.

This is like, 5% dialogue and 95% monologue. You are trying to hard to emulate 8man from the LN. It simply went over your head.

Wow there was alot of words I even can't understand LoL

Damn, why is the reviews section here so shriveled up.
Another great oregairu fanfic from you, yessss
Always a treat whenever I see your writing in this archive. This one no exception, though the ending did feel a bit cut off/abrupt imo...
Funny enough I thought that this scene felt like a reversal of the setup the ending of vol 13 had, with Yukino being the one fumbling for excuses to interact with Hachiman outside of club duties and the frustration of not just spitting it out

But did they ever speak those words to each other? What did Hachiman decide he wanted with Yukino, whart thing was she going to say? If they only contemplate things will be stagnant

I came her for the fluff