Electrical potential. Hardy har

Damn, this was the best P5/RWBY crossover I’ve managed to come across. My only critique of note is that the pacing early on is a bit on the choppy side, and my only(Totally personal) concern is the lack of stated intent to capitalize on this crossover with a pairing, which my inner shameless romantic is positively SCREAMING for. Otherwise, it’s been a pretty great read.

Needing to start over would, quite honestly, suck, but sometimes these things happen, and thus I hope the rewrite is going well, and is still, you know, happening.

I dont like Ren's decision to not tell his friends what is going on in the slightest.

Ghosting, especially a ghosting of this magnitude, is super fucked up. Plus, his lie about studying abroad doesnt even make sense. Why wouldnt he say goodbye to his friends if studying abroad was what he was actually going to do? They're going to immediately know something's up, especially if he's refusing phone and video calls. And what if they wanted to go visit him during a break? They're going to feel super shitty when they figure out what is going on, and of course theyre going to figure it out, because why would Lavenza of all people be giving them updates instead of Ren just calling them.

I know its a pretty inconsequential factor in the grand scheme of the story, but its a pretty huge feel bad when the story starts off with the protagonist being a giant douche bag.

So when are you going to return and continue this?

Hello there I just stumbled upon this story a little over a week ago and I've to say, it was an absolute joy to read but I wondered why it hadn't been updated in so long. Finding out that you were making a rewrite only made me anticipate what the new version would be but there hasn't been any news of the sort. Did you give up and abandon this story? Because all of us that have read this really enjoyed and want to see it grow into something great!

All in all the story was amusing if rather basic. I liked that true to form in the games Ren was building a relationship with various cast members in different ways. His interactions with Coco, Glynda, Blake, and now Neo being standouts in my book. Though, conversely his interactions with Pyrrha and Velvet were awful. Those two didn’t even remotely resemble their canon selves nor even how you initially portrayed them in this fic. Whatever angle you were running with them, I’d promptly forget all about it.
I wasn’t as fond of all the moralistic grandstanding you made Ren do. The Phantom Thieves are an undeniable force for good, but presentation matters quite a bit. I think toning down the speeches and making sure to not forget about Ren’s rebellious side could go a long way in such regards.
In general as I said, the story was fun. Not fantastic but at the very least I enjoyed myself. I’ll be curious to see your reworked version. Cheers, mate.

What’s with the random 180s in personality for some of your characters? Since when is Pyrrha a jealous bitch? Since when is Velvet a spitfire? What’s the point?

I know there's probably no point in saying this considering a re-write is on the way, but I'm surprised Ren didn't scold Pyrrha for caring more about spending time with her crush than training Jaune so he doesn't die or bring his team down. With the way he didn't hesitate to scold Weiss on the first day of classes, it seems off that he didn't do anything but call her jealous.

Other than that small point, this story was fantastic. I really like the dialogue and how Ren interacts with all the characters in different ways. I'm definitely looking forward to the remake.

When are you doing the remake because I really enjoyed this...

When are you remaking this story...
I wanna read it...

i hope you start the remake soon, this was shaping up to be a great story(made even better because Lavenza shows up and her personality in being sweet and dangerous makes everything better)

this story is phantastic!

I'd love to see you come back to this. This story was really nice.

Hope you do it soon

Well everything was going great (I thought so anyway) until the bombshell you dropped; I take it you're something of a perfectionist, seeing as how you want to remake your story. Whenever you do I'll be sure to read it again.

Although I'm curious: Would Neo have joined Ren and Morgana in time? How about RWBY or JNPR? Maybe Ren would start dating Goodwitch? Morgana would walk around in his true form?