I've just binged this entire series and i gotta say. Just fucking wow this is a great series i'm really looking forward to how everything will progress from here on out.

As he had already posted on the website, a suggestion would be if Akeno was part of the harem of naruto , because it doesn't fit with sasuke, in the harem of sasuke you could put xenovia she fits with sasuke in my opinion, because the stories of naruto x Akeno Most of them are rubbish, but I think you're going to know how to carry the story, otherwise you don't find a naruto x kunou very much? I think Naruto will be taken away by the police.

But the truth is your story is very good, you won a new follower, and I hope you keep writing because the truth I enjoy your story and I want to see what will happen with isse.

So goodbye by the way I'm from chili :v

I forgot to say I'm Latino :v

Naruto x Akeno? It's an interesting couple, But it never develops very wel, that's why I'd like to see if you include it in the harem of naruto, because I'd like to see what happens if in the life of akeno enters Naruto, since I feel like she's better off with naruto than with sasuke, if that decreases you the pairs of sasuke you can get xenovia I think she fits better in the harem of sasuke

Your story is very good truth, I hope you followed no one had come so far with a fic, so I hope

"!"

Amazing 500k words, read whole 3 books in 2 days, enjoyed it and i didn't even watch Naruto before, thanks a lot.

YOU. OFF'ED. ANKENO? WTF MAN? YOU BETTER DO SOME DEUS EX MACHINA/EDO TENSSAI BULLSHIT TO GET HER BACK!

Really like this. Naruto's always, ALWAYS, got the sheer power to make his mistakes fine. Not to spit on him, but Might Guy. Does a super move to kill Madara, is disintegrating before everyone. But hey! Naruto likes him! So alive. Really like the fact that grief is actually reverberating in their perceptions of things rather than just blindly lashing out before resolving back to 'default'.

Always like the way you characterize character's through perspectives. Makes me feel like I'm actually seeing through their eyes and thinking how they would. Respect

so are you going to rewrite the rokudame hokage story i really liked the naruko pairing with sasuke.

So. Having read ALL of it now I can actually properly review it. And... I'm ambiguous about it. To be honest I don't really know why I read this far. Usually from what I've seen in fics like this I tend to exit sooner rather than later. Maybe I'm a masochist, or maybe hungry for a dxd fic that isn't a trainwreck from the beginning.

Ugh.

Anywhoozles! Theres a lot of stuff to unpack so Imma start now.

First, the characters. Both the best and worst thing about this fic is definitely the characters. I like the interactions between them differing stemming from all their different backgrounds and how they're all forming them. But. Well they tend to feel samey sometimes. The character traits and outlook tends to blend. Maybe it's an author signature but I dont see why everyone seems to randomly pick up smoking one way or the other. The outlook is weird in that they're all negative and cynical and violent for no reason on the smallest of things. It gets annoying when theres no precedent for it. Grayfia's characterization in the latter part really exemplifies this best I think. Smoking outta nowhere, hating Yasaka's guts when throughout the story they've interacted like once? Never? I understand they're all devils and stuff but having to read another female and how they're soooo jealous they want to rip out some girls heart with their bare hands cause they took their man away or something gets annoying very quickly. Especially when it doesn't really add much. On that note, Valerie's personality seemed to do a 180? Randomly with no explanation? I'm confused. Theres a lot more I can unpack there. Like the lack of focus on characters more diminishing than enhancing but whatever. Next.

Pacing and plot. I honestly have no idea what's happening or why. Why the hell is Zeoticus looking to expand his power base? He has plenty of power. He's a Duke. His son is the Satan Lucifer. His heirs are prodigies. He has ties to both Phenex and Belial(roughly). Why would he randomly start upsetting the power balance in the Shinto faction? For Kunou? Why? Shes gonna be powerful one day yeah but it's not worth starting a whole war over it. Especially when it could and did get him tangled up with the entirety of the Biblical faction. I understand you need to fill decades of content but the story really feels like it has nowhere to go. No goals no aims. Your main characters dont have anything to do so the instigators have to force them to play their game for some reason or another that's barely relevant to them. Neext.

The writing itself. Yes I'm doing this. Sometimes you produce absolute gems. But most of the time all the words to describe everything that's happening while actually saying absolutely nothing extra does get annoying. Reading this I have to skip several paragraphs of text to get what I'm actually here for. The characters and how and why they react to the plot. Especially in the politics talk let the reader infer instead of literally telling them everything that's happening and how they feel about it. It makes it more real and immersive than if you were reading a transcript from a mind reader. I understand you're trying to get to a word count but is that really worth it? Also pacing and cadence. All over the place. Things that hold narrative weight are built up and up and up for chapters on end and then dropped like a half inflated balloon. Sadly. It isn't something you can teach you just kinda have to feel it so I'm saying nothing on that.

Uuuh. So yeah. I could talk about the world building and stuff, which is really hit and miss but that'll just inflate this whole thing so I'm not gonna.

To get to the point, the cast of characters you've managed to assemble together can do something amazing but everytime something would happen it either gets lost in a stream of words or thrown to the side and abandoned. It's kind of frustrating. You're probably too deep to fix it though so. This is just an overly long note to say I'm following instead of favoriting lol. Sorry not sorry for making you read all that if you're even still here.

Have a good day.

~cordo12

Naruto is BIG mad, huh? Yea, lack of sleep eats at everyone, but he was a slight away from biting off Zeoticus' neck and ruining everything.
I also enjoyed how...
Okay.
Let's take a breath
Jingo, listen.
These are supernatural beings. They don't feel the same fatigue that we do. Exaggerate things a bit, but not to this extent. I know you want to bring a bit of realism to the supernatural, but when doing that you also have to drag a bit of the real world into the supernatural.

Hih guess thats what rais and narutos family gets gor using fam like tools. Theres always the chance that they'll say fuck it and take matters in their own hands. Especially when their world tilts sideways becuase of politics.
Now i get why there becoming sell spell-swords?(eh, say that 5 times fast). But either the underworld sees the gremories clan as either incapable or incompetent to keep their successors under control. So im looking foward to seeing where this goes becuase shits about to hit the fan. Also im betting reviving akenos is going to cuase val to go ape shit or perhaps batshit crazy. Shes gonna break,idk enoufh about her gear but the fact that shes insane in the brain already does not bode well. Which im betting is going to escalate during a crucial moment later. Anyways glad to see another chapter and thank you for the story

Alright, good chapter, thoroughly enjoyed myself while i touched all the right places. I definitely loved the scene with Zeoticus and Naruto, because I feel like it truly cements Zeo's character as someone who is so far removed from being a human (because he never was) that any form of trauma involving death is just another day, and any form of trying to give condolences to Naruto comes off as disingenuous. It almost shows that Naruto still has a lot of human in him, and probably always will.

Kinda fell asleep reading the Yasaka meeting scene, but it was passable, had its purpose, served its use.

I do however think you are playing a very dangerous game with your in-accurate 3rd person writing, I like it, but you need to know that people on fanfiction have an Iq no higher than 4, and will forget, and will complain that you are being 'Inconsistent'.

#Smoking,Really?AManOfYourTalents?
#SasukeSaucekaySaucegayHahaPleaseLaugh
#WhatIsTheEggOfHell?

Once again great chapter. I love to hate the shattered feeling of the group. Seriously every character shown thus far is effected but they are all effected differently. I am excited to see where it all goes. I am hoping that the groups unique position gives them a chance to fight so cool opponents and flesh out some other factions like with the Aztecs back in the previous part.
Hope you continue to move forward.

Great chapter as usual and this one cleared a lot of things up
The addition of Yasaka having a hobby was actually something I rly enjoyed
I also like the political insight in this chapter
I just hope the next one won't take as long