Could have been great but fell short by a lot

What shit is this, 7 chapters and only three contain something worth reading.

Semblances should reflect the soul, lunar charge and illusion breaker are not good ideas because Percy was affected by the mist for a year in the 2nd book even after multiple explanations in the 1st. Percy would probably have a healing/retaliation type of semblance. His wounds are healed by his semblance and others' wounds need water for his semblance to transfer over to help them. Major damage to Percy gets a minor rebound on the attacker, which extends to allies through water as a conduct. Water conduct varies on aura usage, but it is always a decent amount, depending on how far away allies are and if the presence of a Grim or silver-eyed warrior is near since the Grimm are of the god of darkness and silver-eyes are from the god of Light, Poseidon would be neutral between light in darkness since the sea gives and takes. Artemis is proud yet understanding, she would probably have a semblance that would allow her to see half of a half. She can see past an illusion/ know when people have a disguise/illusion, but she is unable to completely identify the person's true looks, as she spends more time understanding others, her accuracy in seeing/detecting tricks (ie. illusions, lies, disguises) increase, but it would take up more aura as she focuses her semblance to increase accuracy. This allows her to control how much aura she uses by how much she focuses her semblance. Her understanding the Grimm is an account of her being a goddess and the fact that the two gods of Remnant left long ago. That is why she isn't as affected as Percy.

Ok seriously, out need to quit wasting chapters by putting this useless crap. I want to read a fanfiction not a D&D Background

The Artemis “Call of the Wild” semblance didn’t seem all that great considering the difference of abilities of normal animals to Grimm. Since Artemis can hear the Grimm’s voices, I think the semblance should be revise as to “temporarily bind Grimm to her will” where the strength and quantity of the Grimm will affect the expenditure of her aura.

Nice job on this chapter and welcome back :)

This is a good story. I find the concept interesting since all others that follow this formula either have Percy with Annabeth or by himself. Having Artemis as a side character brings a new spin on the parallel worlds idea.
For Percy’s semblances I would opt for Flame Control. The reasoning is that he is still a Demi-god. Unlike Artemis who’s power is derived from her sphere of influence Percy’s is via his blood. His powers are born from his blood so it can’t be eliminated only suppressed (by dust particles in the air). His Flame semblance would make sense in the form of remnants of Hyperion’s power from a blow taken from his True Form. Percy wouldn’t have any semblance that took power from his Fatal Flaw because that is what it is...a Flaw. It would cease being a flaw if it was turned into a semblance. The flames could be intertwined with the lava under the ocean and mixed with his a ability to create his own personal hurricane. Both are Percy’s improvements to Poseidon’s title of Stormbringer and Earthshaker.
I am not saying for Percy to have all his Demigod abilities in the beginning as that would destroy any story development, but it shouldn’t be ignored out right simply because he is on Remnant. Having Artemis lose her power makes far more sense than Percy losing his.

percy's semblance: elemental control... (his heritage as a demigod originally allowed him control of water... but different world different rules so what says his control over one type of element isnt extended to the rest? water in the air as vapors... hydrogen and oxygen.. can control the wind... ice is made of water... what about fire and dirt and gases? the house of hades had him control a few poisons because they were made partly of water...but what if his power could extend passed that?instead of just seeing THRU illusions why not being able o make them? i dont really give a shit about illusionry as a power of his unless he has a dozen powers to supplement that... elemental fkery going to space and a bit of time...maybe souls...as part of his direct heritage..being of a family of those that rule over the very world... what if its just dormant in his blood..his soul? practically all of the things listed above as part of percy's semblance or possible facets of it...would have reasonable purpose or a point that brings it all out...he could be a natural metal worker... cook.. wielder of general elements...he made a hurricane that summoned some lightning... so why not various types of disasters of any form? just being around the gods could have suffused his soul with parts of or most of their blessing...which got screwed around with by being brought to remnant that interpreted his relationships with the gods and their blessings their affection for him or their hate... as being a part of his soul... therefore part of his semblance...? what if his semblance was generally and bluntly stated by the rules of remnants semblance rules... as being the power over general creation? the entire world? over all energy? i dont care whether other people decide to back this kind of idea for percy...i just want to see a kind of dreamy and wonderful world where all the stories in them all of these things are possibly capable of being part of his soul constantly striving to do more and be more... be better...stronger... faster...to empart his strength and values and more it just seems like it'd be so 'percy'... dont you think? or is that just my thoughts on what i want and what i feel like percy should be based on what ive seen in other stories...?

Destruction and call of the wild

votin' for wind abilities for Percy

Why not a combination of power sponge and the gift? loyalty to someone in a large amount of cases requires the one who is receiving said loyalty to give something in return after all, could call it 'The Bond' or something along those lines

I am so glad you are continuing this story because it is one of the best stories I have seen in a long time. It is well thought out and actually looks like how a normal author would write.
On a different topic, the idea of using his fatal flaw as a reason fo his semblance makes a lot of sense. To claim a certain semblance because he is simply the "Son of the Sea God" makes it seem like that is all he is. He is a person with his own beliefs and ideals, not just a demigod. A semblance is more a reflection of a personality than heritage. By using his fatal flaw as a reason for his semblance, you are reminding your readers about who Percy is as a character, rather than playing off his heritage for power.

Semblance for Artemis Retrieval anything she shoots she can bring back to her, by either when she chooses or when it stops. This is the reason she uses a bow and arrow, not a gun, using a gun would just bring back the bullet or used dust both of which are more useless than an arrow. Also, Artemis is able to retrieve her arrows.

I read some of the original story, but stopped as it seemed kind of forced. It’s nice to see that you have improved your writing skills, though I personally think the censoring of swear words is a bit annoying. Sorry if my advice is a bit blunt or comes off as rude/like I’m trying to take over the story (I did enjoy reading the chapters you’ve written). Now prepare for my 1:54 A.M. scatterbrained rant.

As for Percy and Artemis’s semblances whenever/however they get aura I think Wound Transfer (though I think Burden is a better name) and Cloak are the most fitting.

Percy has a tendency to go far out of his way to help those he cares for. It doesn’t matter what it is, from aggravating powerful immortal beings to shift their attention on him instead, falling into Tartarus, giving up godhood and so on he makes dam sure any and all forms of malicious intent are focused on him the most. He is always the most dangerous when someone he cares for is threatened/harmed, as that is when he usually makes a breakthrough with his abilities-so a semblance that helps alleviate said person’s pain.

As for ideas on how it would work is rather straightforward. Similar to how Reyna can lend others her strength at the cost of emotional backlash, Percy could connect aura’s with someone and transfer injuries from their body to his. The affects of the Styx would normally prevent that, but as the Styx affects the soul to give the blessing and semblances are thought to be extensions of the soul perhaps it doesn’t recognize it as a threat or something along those lines. My theory on how the blessing works is that it ups the durability to Styx’s level, similar to when Clarisse got Ares blessing-just amplified to the level of a Titan and permanent with that one weak spot. The semblance should be able to take on someone’s emotional turmoil as well, altering his thought process similar to Ares’s anger inducing aura.

As for Artemis’s Cloak semblance, it’s rather obvious why that would be fitting. As the goddess of the hunt, stealth is a must lest she tip off her prey on accident. From what little we have seen in the books of her fighting style, she isn’t a head on fighter, relaying on skill and speed to avoid getting hit and taking down her opponent with precise strikes-something a cloaking ability would fit well with.

As for how it would work I’m not sure. At first I thought it could tie into her moon domain and be a form of highly advanced moonlight manipulation. She could summon and bend moonlight however she wants, such as bending the way light reflects to make illusions like Annabeth’s cap but more versatile. But that idea was discarded as fast as I though of it as she could probably already do that and it wouldn’t account for blocking out noise. If need be, the reasoning could always just be divine/auric bullshit until a proper reasoning can be created. Then again a reason doesn’t necessarily need to be created, Yatsu’s semblance is a memory wipe without much explanation on how he can do that.

What the reviewer meant about enhancing Percy’s lightning/wind control was that he manipulates both with his stormbringer powers. He can’t control them, but it is canon that lightning is summoned in his storms and hurricane force winds are created. Now onto my random ideas that could be helpful, or at least make you think.

Will other abilities show up that most authors seem to forget about? Such as Percy’s earthquake powers.

The mist is something big as well that gets sidelined a lot, in canon it is the first layer of the Duat, an ever present veil that distorts reality. Maybe the Duat isn’t a thing in Remnant, but using some divine power they can create their own mist temporarily.

Their is also magic, will we see any shapeshifting, spells/enchantments/curses and such?

Maybe they could create their own divine metal similar to how Imperial Gold is made as well by channeling their divine power into metal to give it that extra durability/properties to make any sort of gear.

Will Artemis’s Symbol of power and Riptide be used to their full potential? A symbol of power is pretty such an empty stale as far as I know, just a weapon with a ludicrous amount of power stored in it as described in canon. People seem to forget that Riptide wasn’t forged as well, but willed into existence being formed by the immortal essence of a Titan. That is definitely symbol of power material.

Interesting premise, but I can't stand that you have review replies as chapters. Use the forums man, they're there for a reason. And your "rules" on reviews are kinda ridiculous.