This is is not good. You do not even make it beilvable

His mother sucked anyway, because she never went easy on shaming her own child, but simply refuses to protect her own flesh and blood from older teems and a cat who stalk him. And everyone else goes “Delia is a wonderful mother and blah, blah, blah, blah!” Yet somehow, she is oddly caring. I don’t like her character.

This story is one of the worst fan fictions I have ever skimmed over. I couldn’t read it because it was so full of cringe. If it was a spoof I would have a different opinion but it’s not. A reasonably smart 10 year old could write something better than this. It’s bad. It really, really bad.

This story seems rather rushed and really OOC, and also lazy. The beginning was good - but then it only got worse. I dislike the beginning of the kidnapping - if Mew knew where Akira was, they should have at the very least sent a rescue squad to save him, instead of spending time away *despite knowing where his son is* and if Ash cared about him so much to be willing to commit a lot of murder, then he should have tended to his son first, and not his petty revenge against the professor. I didn’t mind the OOC-ness of the entire thing until everything else took a dive, I mean it’s kind of expected with the “Ash Betrayal” idea, but I feel like Ash should’ve at least stayed himself, but just more depressed. The descriptions were severely lacking, and I failed to accurately imagine what this would’ve been like. Also, the note you put with Garchomp’s mega thing, where you said you forgot and to tell us to look it up ourselves — I shouldn’t have to say this but as a writer you should at the very least put in the extra effort to do a quick google search yourself. The ending was very abrupt, and left a bad taste in my mouth. It should have been extended more, it seemed like you just wanted to get this entire thing over with. The final chapter held no new information - basically just a copy and paste of previous scenes until the final few sentences which basically just tell us something that was very heavily implied the previous chapter. I’m not a fan of this work, so much so I felt the need to have to write this review. I hope you take this into consideration, and maybe try to improve if you haven’t already - that is if you care. I hope writing this wasn’t a waste of my time.

All story is wtf

not happy,not sad,not angry, just relaxed and mildly cofused...

Akira should become like Bucky Barnes

I always enjoyed a Pokemon story that Ash catches Mew and all that, I hope Pikachu, Mew and all of Ash's other Pokemon will be able to help Ash recover from the betrayal and all that, and i think Pikachu and Mew would make a great couple as a shipping between Pikachu and Mew is rare and all that, good luck with this story.

At the end, child abuse should be assault on a minor

This was a fantastic read well done

just to let you know, steel types have no advantage over dragon types. i do agree with you though on drapion

those are all correct acusations.

Killing Arceus is definetly a unique choice!

Nice story glad Ash made all those traitors pay anyways keep up the great work!

You know what, this seems a bit morbid, but I am honestly cheering at every death and I'm not sure why.