Lylla is a bit of an idiot really. Or at least, she has got a very weird sense of priorities. Like... it's already past midnight and that's when she brings up the new clothes bit? I-is clothing taht important? I mean- you'd think if it was that she would have mentioned it before right? She also knows nothing about Darvin. And yet doesn't ask a single question. He technically bought her so like... she's still a slaaaave. Is she not at all concerned about being stuck with an older, bigger and more dangerous beast?

But then again she ran away from Redwall Abbey for a life of adventure so foolhardiness must come naturally to her.

But if she had asked what Darvin wanted from her befooooore she certainly wouldn't have been surprised by the Long Patrol fortress. Does Darvin intend to saddle her with the hares and walk off with his bounty? Because that's what I think he's doing.

Also loved the 'Piss off' line, and how quickly it turned into 'I'm terribly sorry about that, the doors will be opened shortly'- hares. You gotta love em.

Nice work so far, I look forwards to more.
Update soon!

Haha! Flitch daydreaming again! He's one of the more prominent characters, and I never really imagined having a vermin have a crush on a woodlander. Usually it's the other way around...

Then we get another establishment of Darvin's character. Beating up a few vermin is no small feat, and he seems like the type to enter a fight only if he knows he can win. Lylla's wide-eyed towards Darvin for obvious reasons, and they're off to some incredible adventures. Fun.

Have fun writing!

You know... I kind of wish we had gotten some of Filtch's dream of Lylla, though a part of me only says that because I love dream sequences to an absolutely stupid degree. But like, I can just imagine lots of stupid and silly things happening. Mostly Lylla acting incredibly out-of-character and falling in love and accepting his proposal to marry in seconds. And you just know that in Filtch's dream land he has got a whole garden of roses and he plucks one every day to give to her.

Ahem, moving on. I like that we get a demonstration of Darvin's strength, fitting for a story of this style and calibre he's ridiculously strong to the point of parody. And it fits the tone so well that he can one-shot a fox and send them sliding through the dirt. I love that Darvin is genuinely competent at his job. He gets Lylla away using his brains, sure, but he's got the brawns necessary to do some dirty work, as befitting his advertisement.

New partner, eh? Daaaarvin... weren't you hired to bring her home? Still I'm not complaining, who doesn't like a good buddy-cop story? I imagine I'll be getting a lot of Arya and the Hound vibes from this story and that's a very good thing indeed.

Update soon!

This is a very cool twist on a woodlander being a slave...how she could walk around and not be chained up, of course she had some issues and then Davin shows up...cool!

Finally! An update. I've kinda missed this story for a while, and seeing it pop up after three years is certainly welcome.

I certainly wasn't expecting Darvin to just show up, buy Lylla and leave, but it's kinda refreshing to see some vermin come up with the most obvious solution. No need to shed blood if you're willing to part with a few coins. Though what Flitch would say would be another story...

Happy writing!

I like Dran and Flitch, hope they show up again at some point. I like the angle youve taken with Lylla's slavery. She's a slave and everyone pushes her around but slaves are valuable things and these slavers arent stupid enough to just throw her away.

They sell her instead, though I'm guesssing to Darvin. So, *that* should be a lot of fun XD Interesting method of retrieving a slave I gotta say, just buy them off!

I don't think your writing is sloppy or rushed. Maybe a bit rough around the edges but its been yeeeeeears man. Hard to keep things consistently consistent ya know? For what it's worth though I think your writing style works well for the story as a whole. Keep up the good work!

I love the lighthearted, almost campy tone of this chapter. I love that Darvin isan assassin for hire, a bounty hunter of sorts, and he informs people of his services by... giving out leaflets XD

One word that perfectly summarizes your characters here is -quirky'. Wè've got Crak the artist who's definetly very good at art (its just artists are never respected in their time ya know?) We have the concerned otter mum (who has every right to be concerned considering Darvin's physical descriptions). I love the glimpses we get of Darvin's past. He's fought a wolverine, eh? Is *that* how he got his paws on that sword? And of course we have Darvin. The assassin for hire that works on a leaflet system. Things are going to be very fun indeed!

i will follow this story

I think you should have named the tavern The Broken Stoat, instead of Broke Stoat just to be more grammatically correct.

Your description of the roasted pigeon sounded so good. &is Filtch the ferret suppose to be a version of Gaston.

"Don't go dyin' on me."

F*cking jinx him some more, ya ass!

Three years later, and yer still on about them otter women, eh FW?

Good to see your writing prowess only grows in time. Lovely opening, great descriptions, and a promising start to what I'm sure will be yet another classic. Cheers mate.

Filtch... I REALLY like him, but damn that beast needs some lessons in charm.

Ok, so we to see the damsel in "distress" and you know what, it was a good idea to switch it up so good work in this chapter see you soon .

Only real note is the line "That horrible even in his past". I'm Guessing you meant "event".

Outside of typos though, I am now VERY interested in the full story. Question is, are you going to write any chapters from Lylla's point of view or will it all be Darvin? Will we as the readers know where she is or will we have to uncover the mystery alongside the bounty hunter?

Also, will any of your older characters make an appearance?