English is CLEARLY not your first language, so you REALLY need to get a native English speaker as your beta reader! This is incoherent rambling! It makes no sense!

Too many commas and too many (one would be too many) plural apostrophes.

Terrible. You seem to like those little nearly vertical lines too much. I'm talking about commas and apostrophes. Because there are far too many of them, almost hurting my eyes. I only didn't stop reading to see if you'd misuse them in the whole text, or if your beta finally woke up somewhere. And if I'm disturbed, as a non-native speaker, what do native speakers feel while reading this?

Also, I'm leaving out a couple lines, but the facts are the same (quotation marks are mine):

"Would you fight for a world like this, so, why should I?

Silence.

And scene!"

There's no visual sign where the letter ends and the narrative picks up again, and no visual sign between the story and additional author's notes.

Awesome stry, all the way.

Wow! Just Wow! That was fantastic! Harry telling off the wizarding world and leaving it and Albus and snape get arrested! It just doesn't get any better. I love it!

HILARIOUS I loved it, thank-you!

I love it. You should write a sequel to this one but it should be another one shot. The great Muggleborn exodus. How fast would it take for the pure bloods to fall flat on their faces with them. Just an idea but you may better ones.

absolutely amazing!

Like it

Damn.

Unoriginal and horrible grammar, spelling and style

It's nice enough, but the grammar is absolutely miserable, and you use Far Too Many commas.

Ha in your face dumblshit!

HAHAHA! Those lowlife losers just lost their Savior due to their own actions. Serves them right!

Standing ovation! *clapclapclapclap*