Holy crap, I want to know what Joel did, but have a feeling I know. Excellent story!

I really liked this little one shot and the unspoken words shared between Joel and Ellie while they finally ate their meal. So sweet and perfect! You write for them so well, the characterization was down pat!

I really liked this story. It's well-written, interesting, and the wording overall is just fantastic. Great job on this story. So far, one of the best TLoU fics out there. You know, where it's not JoelxEllie...JoelxEllie is just...no. lol

Part 2
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Of course, this is all just conjecture on my part, because we don't know exactly what happened when Joel told Ellie he was going to take a shit. By the way, I had to laugh at the euphemism they use to let each other know it was time for a bathroom break. It's just one of those things you never really think about, the need to relieve yourself, and how you communicate that to someone without coming right out and saying, "I'm gonna go take a shit." I mean, with family, you can be that blunt, but with other people, there's this need to kinda dance around the subject with more polite phrasing. Huh, I wonder if Ellie and Joel would ever reach the point where they could be that blunt about bodily functions, where they could say, "I gotta piss", or whatever and not bat an eye. But I digress. I actually love the way you left things ambiguous with regards to how Joel got the meat and what happened to the woman and kids. For all we know, Joel may have asked nicely for the meat. Not likely, but there's a chance it happened that way. Or, Joel may have simply threatened them, maybe took one of them hostage until they handed over the meat and then let the hostage go. Or, he may have knocked them out and took some meat, making sure he left some, before leaving. Or, as I believe he did, he may have killed them all, one at a time, stealthily, using his bare hands or a shiv or a bow and arrows, something quiet, because Ellie would've heard gunshots, and after they were dead, he simply took as much meat as he could carry and made his way back to Ellie. I think the case is strongest for Joel killing them, because he made sure to keep Ellie out of the situation, even going so far as to lie to her about what he was doing and making sure she was nowhere near the scene of the crime, like he was protecting her from the evil act he was committing, keeping her hands and conscience clean, preserving what's left of her innocence. I mean, it would've been safer for him to have Ellie watching his back, and she didn't seem to have too strong of an objection to killing those people in order to get food, so she would've done it, would've watched Joel kill them and probably would've helped him do it. However, I believe he was trying to protect Ellie from having to witness or participate in a heinous act and also preserve her vision of him as this noble protector, even though she already knew that he used to be a hunter and killed innocent people. Still, KNOWING Joel has killed innocent people and actually SEEING him kill innocent people are two completely different things. In a way, Joel was being sweet and kind to Ellie by keeping her out of the loop, which seems weird to say, since he probably slaughtered two little kids and a woman in order to feed Ellie and himself.

Even amidst such ugly thoughts/possibilities, you still manage to add some moments of lightness, like Ellie thinking about the meat being smoked, and Joel assuring her that cooking meat over an open fire is NOT smoking it. Being from Texas, I'm sure Joel subscribes to the 'low and slow' theory of barbecue, which I happen to agree with, even though I don't have the patience to do it myself when I cook with a grill. Also, I love the way Ellie had to fight to keep from openly sulking when Joel led them away from the camp and how she had to scold herself to stop thinking about the meat, how good it smelled and how desperately she wanted to taste it, lest she drive herself nuts. And then there's her extreme excitement, bordering on giddiness, when Joel showed up carrying some of that delicious meat. She was like a kid on Christmas, and it was a wonder to behold. Even Joel seemed amused by her reaction, and I'm sure seeing her so happy and knowing that she would be fed made Joel feel good, made him proud and pleased to be able to take care of her.

The best moment of the whole story was the end, where Joel made Ellie sit down while he cut her a small piece of meat and how he made it clear that she was to take small bites and eat it slowly, lest she make herself sick, and she dutifully obeyed, thoroughly enjoying the tasty treat and appreciating Joel for getting it for her. The feeling of family and love as Joellie sat and ate together was simply beautiful. And, even though it seems counter-intuitive, even Ellie's thoughts about how Joel got the meat, what he might have done to the woman and those kids, didn't dampen the moment. If anything, it only made the experience, the moment of bonding between them more powerful and meaningful, because she knew there was a real possibility that Joel killed those people, innocent people, and yet it didn't bother her as much as it should have or as much as she thought it might. I don't blame her for wanting to know what happened, but I also don't blame her for letting it go and being okay with not knowing. It's like she was able to overlook or justify whatever Joel may have done, because he did it for HER, because he LOVES her. Granted, Ellie may not know exactly how Joel feels about her, whether he truly loves her, but she does know that he cares a great deal about her, and his actions have proven that. Him getting her the meat is just further proof that she's important to him, which is why she was willing to overlook something horrible he may have done and why it didn't really seem to bother her. Everything just looks different when filtered through the lens of love. Of course, she may feel differently if she knew the grisly details of what Joel did, but I don't think there's anything Joel could do to make her stop caring about/loving him. And let's not forget Ellie's 'thank you' to Joel. I don't know why, but it surprised me a little that she even thought to thank him. I guess I just assumed that pleasantries like 'please' and 'thank you' aren't necessary between them, that those things are implied and don't need to be said. Plus, when you're trying to survive, things like 'please' and 'thank you' aren't exactly priorities. Still, I love that she both thought to thank him and felt the need to say it. But what I really love about that exchange was what they didn't say. It kinda reminded me of the Princess Bride and how Westley would say "As you wish." but really meant, "I love you." The 'thank you' and 'you're welcome' between Ellie and Joel kinda felt like they were saying "I love you." to each other. Either way, it was sweet and absolutely beautiful. :)

You know, Ellie raised an interesting question about whether Joel would've done whatever he did in order to get the meat if it was just him, if he had never met her. That's a tough one to answer. You'd think it would be easier for Joel to kill, anyone, in order to survive before Ellie started working her magic on his wounded soul. However, since there were kids involved, I'm not sure if Joel would've been able to kill them, because he knows what it's like to watch a child die, and it nearly destroyed him when it happened to Sarah. So, I'm thinking, in this instance, without Ellie involved, Joel might have just moved on without stepping foot in that camp and possibly ended up starving to death. But, since Ellie was involved, I think Joel was willing to do ANYTHING in order to provide for her, to make sure she continued to survive, and if that meant killing a couple of kids and an innocent woman, then so be it. That doesn't mean Joel wouldn't have been affected, negatively, by killing them, but he'd be able to live with that guilt for Ellie's sake.

Anyway, this is a beautifully crafted tale of life and love in a harsh and cruel world. As always, you've done a masterful job of adding to the world of TLoU by creating a moment that could have and may very well did happen off screen during the game. It's realistic, in character and adds another layer to Ellie and Joel's relationship. It's just a pity that we'll never know what really happened to that woman and those kids. In any event, I'm thrilled that your muse is in a groove, and I can't thank you enough for creating and sharing this wonderful story with us. :)

Extremely well done, Baby Girl! :D

P.S. - My review is over 3k words. Yep, still got it. :P

Another snapshot of life for Ellie and Joel in the cruel reality of Outside. FUCK YEAH! *does happy dance* Sorry, but you could write hundreds of these little vignettes set "off screen" during the game, and I would be happy as a pig in shit. :D Seriously, this, like all the others, is BRILLIANT! It's easy to imagine this happening during the game, and it's moments like this that I wish were actually shown during the game, because it adds a richness and realism to the world of TLoU and better shows us the depth of Ellie & Joel's relationship.

I realize the makers of the game didn't wanna take the time away from the overall story to focus on the little things like how difficult it must have been for anyone to survive outside a QZ in the game, but you really brought home the truth that finding food and water would be a major challenge at different points along Joellie's journey to the Fireflies, especially during the time in and around winter. Ellie's reaction to starving, literally, is pretty much what I'd expect from her. A little whiny, but I'd expect that from anyone her age. Still, she handled the situation better than most adults would have, and I credit that to her innate toughness and her not wanting to disappoint Joel by being an obnoxious, complaining baby. Plus, there's the fact that Joel was just as hungry as she was, and yet he didn't say a word about it. So, basically, if Joel could tough it out, Ellie figured she could, too. Then again, Joel must have experienced periodic bouts of starvation during his time as a hunter and perhaps even before that, like immediately after the world went to shit, because people would've hoarded food and supplies for fear that there wouldn't be enough to go around. Either way, I have no doubt that Joel had experienced near-starvation before, and while maybe he wasn't used to it, he at least could tolerate it better than Ellie. Although, even in a QZ like Boston, there wasn't exactly an abundance of food, so maybe Ellie did know what it was like not to have regular meals. Still, I doubt she went for nearly a week without eating.

Speaking of eating, I don't envy Ellie and Joel their last meal of creamed corn and squirrel. Blech! I HATE creamed corn, and though I've never had squirrel, I doubt it's all that tasty. Still, when you're starving, ANY meal has to seem like a scrumptious delicacy. Kudos on the realism, though. On a slightly different note, Joel was right on about substituting water for food in an effort to trick your stomach into thinking you were eating. Of course, that trick only works for so long, and it doesn't give your body the nutrients it needs. Still, you need water MUCH more than you need food. I mean, you can only go a few days without water, but you can go as much as a couple of weeks without food. It may not be pleasant, but it can be done. However, the longer you go without food, the weaker you become, and when you're out in the wilderness with all kinds of people and animals and Infected who would love to kill you, you can't afford to succumb to weakness from lack of food.

You really set this bleak, near-hopeless tone initially, with Ellie & Joel slowly starving to death, and then you introduce this ray of hope with the smoke from the cooking fire, or just a campfire used for cooking. I just love how excited Ellie got when she thought there might be people nearby with food. I can't blame her, either. After four or five days without food, the prospect of ANY kind of sustenance would get me excited, too. I also like that Ellie refers to the many times she and Joel came across camps, occupied or otherwise, and how they would raid them for supplies. It's just another layer to their story of survival and a record of what they've done on their journey. I just wonder if they've killed people at any of these camps they've come across. Anyway, Ellie's excitement is palpable, especially when she starts smelling cooking meat and sees how much meat there is, more than enough to fill her up and keep her full for a few days, if not more. I had to chuckle at Ellie's growling stomach as she and Joel scoped out the camp. To Ellie, it must have seemed like her stomach was growling so loud that it might give away their position. LOL

The description of the camp itself was really well done. It was so easy to visualize the kids and the woman, presumably their mother, as they went about the business of cooking meat and keeping an eye out for trouble. Speaking of that, I LOVE how you handled the kids. I mean, I can just see that little boy being bored outta his skull, standing there with the shotgun, charged with keeping watch, but being more interested in the fire and watching his sister, if she is his sister, cook the food they'd soon be eating. And the mother, I can see her tending to the meat, cutting chunks off the carcass and looking up occasionally to check on the kids and seeing her son "goofing" around and scolding him for it. It's actually a sweet little scene, or it would be if not for the fact that Ellie & Joel were looking down on them from their hiding spot, plotting ways to get their hands on some, if not all, of that meat. And that brings us to Ellie and her rather dark musings about the various things she'd be willing to do in order to fill her belly with food. It's sad to say, but I can easily understand why Ellie would be willing to kill in order to satisfy her hunger. After all, when you're starving, it's all about survival, and people will do almost anything to survive, including kill. Of course, Ellie's almost callous/indifferent attitude toward killing in order to get food is thanks in no small part to her experience with David during the winter. Ellie's killed, more times than I'm sure she'd care to remember, but it was the brutal, very personal way she killed David that I believe helped desensitize her, at least somewhat, to the prospect of killing. I think Ellie learned a hard lesson during winter, that life is all about survival, and sometimes that means you can't afford to have morals or allow your emotions to guide you. In other words, when it's life or death, you choose life, for yourself and those you care about, even if that means you have to sacrifice innocent people, including children, in the process.

I hate to say it, but I was kinda proud of Ellie for at least considering killing the woman and kids in order for her and Joel to survive. It's a horrible thing to even think about doing, especially for Ellie, but it shows that she's growing up, learning the harsh lessons of the world, becoming more like Joel, a survivor. Then again, it's also pretty sad that Ellie's reached the point, after less than a year with Joel in the "real" world, where she can consider killing innocent people, including children, and she doesn't feel all that guilty about it, and that she's actually capable of killing anyone in cold blood. She's lost a lot of her innocence, which is both good and bad. It's good in that it will help her survive, but it's also bad in that life isn't as precious to her as it once was. Sadly, growing up, gaining experience and wisdom, often means you have to give something up, because nothing in life, except maybe love, is free. Everything has a price, and it's just a matter of whether or not you're willing to pay it. Still, even though Ellie is showing a darker side of herself that didn't exist before she started this journey with Joel, she hasn't become as jaded, callous or disconnected as Joel, at least not yet. There's still some of that childlike innocence to her, that youthful optimism and altruism, and I love that you've managed to strike a balance between the darkness and the light within her and still have her be the Ellie we all know and love.

Gotta say, I was a little surprised that Joel decided to just walk away from life saving food, especially since Ellie was starving, and it didn't appear like it would be that difficult to actually get the food. I didn't think Joel would risk Ellie in order to get the meat, but he could've left Ellie at their perch, told her to cover him, and then he could've infiltrated the camp, taken out the woman and kids, and he and Ellie could've feasted on delicious meat. Or, if he didn't wanna kill the woman and kids, he could've tried to negotiate for some meat and still left Ellie safely out of harm's way. However, I never really thought Joel would try to get the meat by any means other than taking it by force. Any other method would open him and Ellie up to too much risk, and he wasn't willing to risk her life for anything, and I even think he was reticent to risk his own life for fear of not being around to protect and take care of Ellie. When they were both watching the camp, and Ellie was thinking up ways to get some meat, I just knew Joel was thinking the same thing, but I have no doubt that Joel was thinking of the fastest, most efficient and humane way of killing the woman and kids without too much risk. I imagine Joel struggled with the thought of killing kids, but keeping Ellie alive won out over any moral objections he may have had. However, just because Joel decided on a course of action doesn't mean he was completely without compassion, which is why he led Ellie away and made her believe that they were giving up on getting any meat. He had no problem dirtying his own hands, but he didn't want her getting innocent blood on her own or even witnessing him doing the deed, because he was afraid it would cause her too much guilt or make her look at him differently, like he was a monster.

Of course, this is all just conjecture on my part, because we don't know exactly what happened when Joel told Ellie he was going to take a shit. By the way, I had to laugh at the euphemism they use to let each other know it was time for a bathroom break. It's just one of those things you never really think about, the need to

Once a Hunter, always a Hunter.

Joel Miller long ago considered himself damned to hell so what concern was it to him to commit yet another crime to preserve the one life that is left that has any value to him? Hardly a nice mindset but one that, regrettably, you can understand.

Wow, that was nice fic. Im already so hungry that I want some of that too. LOL I always like the way you use Ellie some time she is just like a kid and other so more mature. But the real mystery is what Joel do to get the meat? That is so genies to let the people use they imagination to think how Joel Obtained the food for Ellie, thanks that was a nice piece.

Reading his actually made me hungry. I am wondering what Joel did. 'Cause there are kids there, I hope he gave them ammo or a gun or something in trade for the meat. Great one shot, by the way.