Great read, I wouldn't mind reading more.
However, this story is in the wrong category! I'm not sure which one you ought to place it in because the fandom is unclear, but the story itself has nothing to do with this category, which is about a manga titled "Anima". I recommend reading it. But if you want more attention on your story, I advise you to move it to a more relevant category.
Good luck!
Kraehenhexe

This story is looking great so far. Quite a few grammar errors, but all in all, decent story. Keep up the great work! I look forwards to the next chapter.