Never mind it was Kasper, love the story aha

I’m so confused, I thought Zander killed himself?

Why would you do this to me? Well now I’m going to go fine your other book

okay, first off, i love you style of writing and plot. some writers have amazing ideas but ruin it with incorrect spelling and grammar. YOU do not! only thing i think i can say that is wrong about your story is that thrice isn't a word. sorry.

I can’t wait of the mental stage to start!

FINALLY! As per usual amazing! I love your story. It’s by far the best divergent fanfic out there. Can’t wait to continue reading.

Wow I love this story! What a cliffhanger!

Just finished your story and overall, I found it super enjoyable and fun to read. I think it’s really interesting that you didn’t follow the book or movies and even made their physical part from initiation so long. I liked it a lot and I honestly feel like such an extensive physical fighting stage was needed to show that an initiate can’t just learn to fight in like a few short weeks. I liked the romance between Avery and Eric and I think they have amazing chemistry and sparks were just flying everywhere. I like that even though Eric claims to lack control around Avery, he actually has a lot of control. He likes her and because of it, he respects her and wants their moment to be perfect which I think is a really sentimental and romance trait to have.

As far as some critiques. I think Avery is a tad bit too perfect and too good and can come off a bit unlikable. You can be a strong and independent women without being perfect. In this story, she is naturally An amazing fighter that she can beat everyone with just using half her abilities and even take down a leader. She learns to shoot perfectly within a day and great at knife throwing even with her non dominate hand. I know you did that whole “she has bad eyes and it always goes to the right” thing, but still she’s a perfect shot. that’s kind of like saying “she’s beautiful but has a pimple on her left cheek” she is also busty and boys love her and can drink 16 shots like one of the boys without throwing up or being hungover. She also is kind of a bad friend yet gets mad at her female friends for being wierd around her? She literally ditches her friends to sneak off with Eric every chance she gets. She kind of lacks depth if I have to be truly honest.

If you were to ever go back and edit through this story, I think it can really help ur story to add more personality and depth to Avery. Think about weaknesses and character flaws. She’s the central character yet she doesn’t really grow in a personal level. I would have loved to see her struggle and fail a couple of times and how she works her way around it to find Inner strength.

Thank you for a great story! I always love reading Eric fanfics!

This is such a well written fanfic. Really hope the sequel is not too far away!

Is there going to be a sequel?!

I rally love the story. Please update soon.

Disgasting. Unfair. Stupid. Weak. Lily should be out, avery should be fined for cheating, Eric should be disciplined and ranked lower. Yack...

Great job! And I love how you can be so excited by your own writing.

Plzzz update

please write the next part. I really want to know what's going to happen...