I adore this story!
The Crystal Gems defeating Malachite while not fused is a wonderfully compelling and inspiring moment. It is by far my favorite surprise in this story.

The action part was written excelently. I swear I was as excited as Steven for this battle

Oh my, this was creepy. The stoty Peridot told made the me imagine Peridot talking to her log with a really cold voice. It's creepy, but I like creepy things so it's great

Da feels! This was great! Loved it! Almost actually made me cry, which doesn't happen often so... congratulations, this must mean it's really good writing

soo, is peridot ever gonna get a weapon or is she gonna have to rely on her gadgets forever. because, the way I see it, it's not that different from when she had to rely on her enhancers

I love your interpretation of the Steven Universe series; redeeming Peridot the way you did and making out Malachite as big a meanie as possible. The way you presented her is astounding; making her presence as imposing and frightening as drowning in storm-tossed, brackish waters, encompassing fear of the hidden unknown of the dark while still being an impossible god-like force was just freaking amazing. I wish I had better words to describe it. It left a tangible feel of cold fear for me!

Also, your fic resembles the series closely, but it still gets away with being an AU at the same time. I love it because of that. The series gave us recent updates and all, with Malachite being canonically unfused now, but I feel like your fic is a more immersive, action-filled experience with its own take on the series. You put a work into it; and I can't wait for more.

On another note, I'm curious to see what'll become of Jasper in the future; I'm sure she is... uh, 'redeemable' in her own way, but she's still a damn bully whose likely to cling to Homeworld's dogma. Dunno about that; her behavior is questionable anyway considering she didn't have much time to show us who she really is besides being a battle-hardened jerk.

Now for the other critique I feel I have to put in despite the awesome direction this story is taking: You need to work on speech patterns. I would know: I've made the same EXACT mistakes whenever I write my fics. I still do it from time to time, and its a habit I'm trying to kick.

The characters are speaking too formerly and not enough connotations and compound words are being used. Like for example: When Steven says, "I am" at any point in the fic, you should write it as "I'm" or "who is" as "whose" or "who's". Peridot speaking in this manner is expected since she's not used to Earth grammar, but Steven deferring to another like this isn't passable. Amethyst is the same way as Steven, but Garnet and pearl are... eh. You know what I mean. English is a clumsy, sometimes lazy language, so it should be written like that. Your sentences are shortened immensely in the wrong run, and it saves time in writing when you use compound words. Its also casual sounding, and it leaves a more realistic feel to the dialogue. Your earlier chapters are especially reflective of this strange writing quirk, and I'd recommend looking back at those in the future.

That's the worse of the critique anyway; I can't see anything else out of the ordinary. *shrugs*

Whatever the case, I love what you did with the story, and I look forward to seeing more. Take your time in writing it; perfection is something we should strive for, even if we miss the mark. I manage with my fics in this manner and its worked well! I hope to see more form your within the nearest future.

Your new fan, me.

Hope there is more to come at whatever schedule is good for you!

What an amazing story! Very well written :D

Though I'm sad that you didn't gave Jasper any chance to redeem herself...

AMEDOT! AMEDOT! please amedot:')

Bravo! This chapter was very long and amazing! It made me go on a emotional roller coaster.

That chapter was EPIC! And so long, too!(thats what she said) It was totally worth the wait!

O.O soooo long

That was...amazing. I split it up throughout the day to read it all, haha!

Negahehaaa! My thought process. Oh. My. Gowsh. I love this story! Ah, can't wait for more! Keep it up! This chapter was so amazing! Great job bro! :D

I love it! Love, love, love! I can't wait to read more! Finished it in about 3-4 hours of solid reading.